


It Takes a Village

by Siri_Kenobi12



Category: Star Wars Legends: Jedi Apprentice Series - Jude Watson & Dave Wolverton, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Death, Cute Anakin, Drinking, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Training, Friendship, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt Obi-Wan Kenobi, Hurt/Comfort, Jedi Code (Star Wars), Jedi Culture, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), Medical Procedures, Obi-Wan Kenobi Gets a Hug, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, Obi-Wan is a new dad, Padawan Anakin Skywalker, Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, Post-Star Wars: The Phantom Menace, Qui-Gon doesn't get it, SiriWan (if you squint), Star Wars Legends: Jedi Apprentice Series References, Young Anakin Skywalker, bond ripping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:35:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 51,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23680915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siri_Kenobi12/pseuds/Siri_Kenobi12
Summary: The events, consequences and aftermath of the Phantom Menace as seen through the eyes of Obi-Wan’s closest friends. And when they see their friend grieving the loss of his Master, dealing with the fame associated with killing a Sith while also taking on a Padawan (the Chosen One no less) they step in to help because they realize he is in WAY over his head.
Relationships: Adi Gallia & Siri Tachi, Bant Eerin & Obi-Wan Kenobi & Garen Muln & Reeft & Quinlan Vos, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Siri Tachi, Qui-Gon Jinn & Obi-Wan Kenobi
Comments: 141
Kudos: 264





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I got this idea while thinking about all the times I have been an outsider or a source of advice for friends when they go through major life changing events. TPM was a complete upheaval of Obi-Wan’s life, this is what I’d imagine his friends would do in response to that upheaval.
> 
> This is mostly a good old fluff piece, though I can’t help letting a little angst sneak in there. 
> 
> Enjoy!

“You’re sure he’s home?” Bant asked, excitedly. 

“Yeah, I just saw him and Master Qui-Gon walking the halls with some blonde kid.” Garen Muln stated as the two Padawans walked into the archives. “That’ll give us five for tonight’s game!” 

“If we’re even still playing.” Bant motioned towards another Padawan who seemed engrossed in her datapad with several others scattered on the desk in front of her. 

Garen huffed. “Kriffing over-achievers” 

Siri Tachi was lost in study, her long blonde hair was pulled into a messy bun on top of her head and it had three different pencils stuck in it. Her friends giggled to themselves because they knew she always forgot she left the writing instruments in her bun, the more pencils that ended up in her hair the busier she usually was. Garen poked her in the shoulder as they approached. 

“Hey Tachi, you wanna stop messing with the grading curve for the rest of us?” He asked, sarcastically.

“Well, some of us have to pick up the slack left over from OTHER Padawans Garen.” Siri stated without looking up from her datapad. 

Bant shook her head at the exchange and started looking at the datapads on the desk. She knew a lot of pressure to outperform was on Siri, she was chosen as a Padawan at an earlier age than most and by a High Council Member. Expectations were unreasonably high for her and any other apprentice would’ve probably crumbled under the pressure, but Siri’s competitive nature caused her to not only meet expectations but soar above them. It was something that Bant respected and feared about her friend. 

Bant picked up one of the datapads. “You’re researching slavers?” 

“Yeah, my Master needs a detailed report on the various slave trade organizations to present to the Council.” Siri finally looked up at her friends. “I don’t know why it’s urgent, but apparently the Council needs this ASAP.” 

“Does that mean Sabbac is off?” Bant asked and Garen whined. 

Siri sighed. “Do we even have enough for a full game?” 

“Yeah, Reeft and Obi-Wan just got back!” Garen excitedly exclaimed. “Come on Tachi, you got to give me a chance to win my money back.” 

“Okay, okay fine.” She smirked at Garen. “I’m always down to take more of your credits Gar.” 

“We’ll go tell Reeft and Obi to meet at your place?” Bant asked.

“Yeah, Master Gallia said she’ll be in Council meetings till late tonight. Apparently their scheduled ones got pushed back due to an emergency.” Siri looked around to make sure no one was listening and then lowered her voice. “I heard her talking to Master Plo, something about a Sith Lord.” 

Bant’s eyes went wide and Garen’s mouth dropped in response. 

“No way, you’re so full of Bantha crap.” Garen tried to hide his shock with snark. 

Siri shrugged and took a sip from her now cold cup of Caff. “Hey, she said it, not me.”

“I don’t think we should be talking about this.” Bant’s eyes nervously looked around the room. 

“Lighten up Bant, it’s not like it’s forbidden to talk about the Sith.” Garen clapped the Mon Calamari on the back. 

“No, she’s right. I shouldn’t be talking to you guys about Council business.” Siri sighed and began gathering her datapads. “It’s reckless.” 

Garen sighed. “The one time you actually have something interesting to say and of course you think it’s ‘reckless’. Remind me again why we keep you around Tachi?” 

Siri looked down at the table in front of her, trying to hide her emotions. She knew why they kept her around, why she was friends with them in the first place. If it hadn’t been for Obi-Wan’s insistence and his uncanny ability to somehow get his way Siri wouldn’t have become a member of their tight knit group. It had been a rocky first few years finding her place as one of them, luckily when her relationship with Kenobi became strained after the Fry mission she didn’t lose her other friends in the process. She thanked Bant for that, in fact the kind hearted Mon Calamari was the main reason she and Obi-Wan could even stand to be in the same room together. 

Siri decided to ignore Garen’s comment. “So, my place at say 19:00, and you’ll bring the drinks?” 

Garen and Bant nodded excitedly and then left to go tell Reeft and Obi-Wan about their plans. It didn’t take long for them to locate Obi-Wan Kenobi, they spotted him following his Master onto one of the balconies just outside the Council chambers. Garen pointed them out to Bant and they headed towards the balcony, but stopped short when they overheard the conversation. 

“Do not defy the Council Master, not again.” Obi-Wan exclaimed, the weariness in his voice was evident.

“I shall do what I must Obi-Wan.” Qui-Gon stated calmly. 

Bant and Garen exchanged glances. “Not this again.” Garen huffed beneath his breath. 

“Hopefully Obi will just let it go.” Bant whispered and as if right on que she heard her friend’s voice.

“If you’d just follow the code you’d be on the Council, they will not go along with you this time.” Obi-Wan tried to keep his voice calm, he was tired of having this argument with his mentor. 

Garen and Bant simultaneously did a face-palm in response. They knew the inevitable answer from Qui-Gon was coming, one that irritated Obi-Wan to his core because there was no argument against it without sounding arrogant and that was just not something Kenobi would do.

“You still have much to learn, my young apprentice.” Qui-Gon clapped his Padawan on the shoulder, shutting down the topic. After a beat Qui-Gon continued. “We can discuss this later, I do believe Padawan Eerin and Muln are eager to see you.” 

Bant and Garen nervously walked onto the balcony, Qui-Gon offered them a smile, Obi-Wan continued to look out towards the traffic of Coruscant, his back to all three of them. 

Bant bowed, followed quickly by Garen. “Hi Master Jinn, it’s good to see you. I hope your last mission was productive.” 

Qui-Gon glanced over his shoulder at his sulking Padawan. “It was Bant, thank you.” 

The Jedi Master smiled at the three friends, he knew Obi-Wan would feel better after spending time with them, as they all grew older opportunities to see his childhood friends became much more infrequent and therefore more precious. 

“I’ll leave the three of you to catch up,” he turned his attention to Obi-Wan, forcing the younger man to look at him. “Keep you com handy, the Council will want to see us after Anakin’s tests.” 

Obi-Wan, always the dutiful Apprentice nodded. “Yes Master.” 

Before leaving Qui-Gon placed his hand once again on Obi-Wan’s shoulder, this time gently squeezing it. As soon as his Master was out of sight Obi-Wan turned to his friends and offered an exhausted smile. Bant ran up and hugged him, she was one of the few who was allowed to show affection to him in public and she took advantage of that every chance she got. 

“Welcome home Obi,” she exclaimed as she released him from their hug. 

“Thanks Bant,”

Garen and Obi-Wan exchanged a clearly choreographed special handshake. “Hey man, good to see you.” Garen stated as they finished the complicated greeting. 

“Likewise,” 

“So, Sabacc tonight?” Garen asked, getting right to the point. 

Obi-Wan was about to protest, all he wanted at the moment was a hot meal, a hot shower and his bed. But, then he realized after almost a week of being stranded in the desert confined to a broken starship with a gaggle of teenage girls and a nervous security team, not to mention the frustration of his Master insisting the mission turned up not only the return of the Sith, but the prophesied Chosen One, he really needed to blow off some steam. 

“Sounds great, I honestly could really use a drink.” Obi-Wan ran a hand through his spiky hair, he could feel sand clinging to his scalp, he could also feel the sand that had collected in his boots. “But first let me take a shower, I think I brought half of Tattooine back with me.”

Bant tilted her head. “I thought you went to Naboo, why were you on Tatooine?”

“Long story,” Obi-Wan sighed. 

“Another of Qui-Gon’s side quests?” Garen asked. 

Obi-Wan chuckled. “You have no idea.” He then offered another smile to his friends and headed back into the temple. “Where should I meet you later?” 

“Tachi’s apartment, 19:00.” Garen answered. 

Obi-Wan inwardly sighed, the last thing he wanted to do after his mission was to have to monitor his mental shields against Siri all evening long. But, he had already committed to going, so he told himself that he would be sure to only have one, maybe two drinks. 

“Sounds great, see you then,” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Siri took a sip of the Ebla beer that she had planned on nursing all night, she refused to drink too much if Obi-Wan was going to be around. She unfortunately had learned the hard way that she got a bit too flirtatious when she drank, so she figured it was better to not put that kind of pressure on hers and Obi-Wan’s already complicated friendship. She looked up at the chrono on the wall and sighed. 

“He’s over an hour late, maybe we should start without him.” She motioned to the cards laid out on the table. 

“He said he’d be here,” Bant exclaimed, disappointment clearly evident in her voice.

“He probably fell asleep again.” Reeft looked up from his position on the couch, eating snacks from the bowl on his lap.

“Nah, knowing Master Qui-Gon he's probably still stuck in the Council meeting,” Garen huffed and then looked at Siri. “Have you heard anything?” 

Siri shook her head and Garen gave her a look of disbelief. “I haven’t even seen my Master since this morning, how would I know anything?”

“You never listen in through the training bond?” Garen asked, taking a swig of his ale. 

“No!” Siri became defensive. “And even if I were to try she blocks it during Council meetings.” 

“Oh-ho, so you’ve tried before.” Garen teased. 

Siri felt her cheeks grow hot. “I...I...no. Shut up Garen.” 

She was saved from having to explain herself more by the door chime, followed by Obi-Wan Kenobi uncharacteristically storming in without an invitation. He seemed to be muttering under his breath and began pacing the common room, Reeft had to lift his legs onto the couch to make way for Obi-Wan’s path. Kenobi then walked into the kitchenette, grabbed a beer, opened it with the Force and proceeded to drink the entire bottle in one long drink. 

His friends watched him and looked at one another in concern. 

“So, I’m guessing the Council meeting went well.” Garen attempted to break the tension. 

Obi-Wan placed the empty bottle on the counter with a little more force than necessary. He then picked up another and again opened it with the Force. He looked at Garen and leaned against the counter. 

“Oh it went spectacularly, Qui-Gon nominated me for the trials.” He took an angry sip of his beer.

His friends collectively rose to their feet and seemed to ask the same question in unison. “Wait, what?”

“You had no idea he was going to nominate you?” Bant asked.

“Nope, in fact not even an hour before the meeting he told me that I still have much to learn...so, surprise was on me.” Obi-Wan took another drink. “And you guys will never believe the glowing recommendation he gave me to the Council, I think his exact words were ‘headstrong, much to learn about the Living Force but capable’...you hear that guys, my Master thinks my best quality is that I’m CAPABLE.” He took another long drink.

“I’m guessing it did not go over well with the Council.” Reeft said sadly. 

“No my friend it did not, in fact I believe Master Yoda made it perfectly clear I am not ready for the trials in his eyes, calling me out in front of the entire Council...so, there’s that.” Obi-Wan placed the bottle on the counter and clapped his hands. “Now, I probably only have time for one round before I have to head back so who’s dealing?” 

“Obi-Wan...” Bant’s voice was sympathetic.

Obi-Wan grabbed his drink and sat down at the table. “Bant, wipe that look off your face and let’s play cards.”

“Why would Qui-Gon nominate you out of the blue like that?” Garen asked, taking a seat across from Obi-Wan.

“Oh, he wants to train the Chosen One and I guess it slipped his mind that he already has a Padawan.” Obi-Wan answered nonchalantly, shuffling the deck of Sabacc cards. “So, what’s wild?”

His friends exchanged worried glances again. 

“Did I miss something while I was on my mission?” Reeft asked, taking another bite of the salty snack. 

“I think we all did,” Garen shrugged. 

Siri sat down on the chair next to Obi-Wan and reached out to hold his wrist, to stop him from shuffling the cards. “Obi-Wan,” 

He sighed, refusing to meet her gaze. “Qui-Gon came across a boy on Tatooine, he is incredibly strong in the Force. He has the highest concentration of Midi-chlorians of any Jedi in history… my Master believes him to be the prophecy that will bring balance to the Force.” 

“Since when does Master Qui-Gon care about visions and prophecies?” Siri asked. “I thought he always focused on the Living Force?”

Obi-Wan shrugged. “Master Dooku apparently was really dedicated to studying the various ancient texts and prophecies. He had Qui-Gon study them as well outside of his regular classwork.” He chuckled to himself. “But, I thought it was something Qui-Gon hated, guess when you find a prophecy in the flesh it changes your perspective.” 

“And the Council is refusing to let the boy train to be a Jedi?” Bant deduced. 

“He’s nine years old with a very healthy attachment to his mother, has a dark past because he was raised as a slave, and if I may be so bold to say he has a bit of a temper.” Obi-Wan explained. 

“They think he’s dangerous.” Siri answered and Obi-Wan placed a finger on his nose indicating she had guessed correctly. “But, Qui-Gon can override the Council’s decision by taking the boy on as his apprentice.” 

Bant looked shocked at Siri’s conclusion. “But, what does that mean for you Obi-Wan, since the Council doesn’t think you’re ready for the trials?”

Obi-Wan took another long swig from his beer before answering her. “I suppose Qui-Gon will officially renounce me as his Padawan. After that all I can hope for is that someone else will take over my training, though given my age and the fact that my previous Master was a very unorthodox Jedi so there's a possibility I could struggle to adjust to a different training style, and then there’s the whole Melia/Daan thing.” He sighed. “I don’t expect other Masters will be clamoring to take on that obligation.”

Siri squeezed his wrist in support, he finally looked at her with a look in his eyes that made her desperately want to hold him. Bant suddenly came up from behind him and wrapped her arms around him, clearly she saw the same look in his eyes. Siri released his wrist and he reached up and held Bant’s arms in affection. 

“It’s okay Bant, I just...I have to trust in the Force.” Obi-Wan did his best to compose himself, unable to handle his friend’s sympathetic eyes. “Maybe I just ended up taking the long way around to get to the Agri-Corps.” He chuckled. “It’s sort’ve funny when you think about it.” 

“Obi-Wan, don’t say that.” Bant argued. 

He suddenly realized he probably shouldn’t have consumed the beer so fast, he could feel his throat constricting, wanting to cry. He suddenly felt like he was twelve years old and watching his dreams of being a Jedi Knight slip from his grasp. Painful memories and feelings of self-doubt and rejection began to resurface to the front of his mind. He shook that feeling off, deciding that no matter what was happening, he would focus on the here and now (see Qui-Gon I do listen) and in this moment he was still a Senior Padawan, still a Jedi, and he would behave like one. 

He freed himself from Bant and moved towards the door. 

“Guys, seriously I’m fine.” He smiled an unconvincing smile at them. “I’ll talk to you when I get back from Naboo.” 

“Naboo, they’re sending you back to Naboo?” Garen asked. 

Obi-Wan nodded. “Yeah, the Queen is worried about her people, she decided to go back and stand up to the Trade Federation, it’s honestly really brave of her, stupid, but brave.” He sighed. “I swear, it feels like this kriffing mission just won’t end.” 

As he turned to leave he heard Siri’s voice call out to him. “Obi-Wan, may the Force be with you.” 

Just outside the door he closed his eyes tightly, willing himself not to cry. He had proved himself worthy of being a Padawan before, he could do it again. In his heart he knew that Qui-Gon loved him like a son, and that deep down he probably really did believe Obi-Wan was ready for the trials, but that still didn’t stop old wounds from opening. Obi-Wan knew that the Maverick Jedi Master always did what the Force willed, sometimes so brashly that he didn’t stop to consider all the consequences. In that moment Obi-Wan decided that was one lesson he could take away from all of this, from this moment forward he would try to be mindful of all consequences whenever possible. 

He quickly lifted his head and headed for the Temple gate, knowing Qui-Gon was already waiting for him at the Senate landing pad. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later that night Siri Tachi woke up with a start, she wasn’t sure what was happening but the air around her felt sickeningly heavy and felt as if it was going to suffocate her. As she probed within the Force she felt as if there was a violent storm on the horizon, everything was dark and heavy. She felt her stomach churn, she quickly ran to the freshner to expel the contents of her last meal. 

When she finally felt she was stable enough to release her clutches on the side of the toilet she stumbled into the common room, deciding that a soothing cup of tea would help calm her down. She noticed that the Force still seemed thick, but that it wasn’t as angry as it had felt when she first woke up. As she reached the kitchen she noticed that the tea pot was already on the stove, she turned and looked at the table and saw Adi Gallia’s silhouette sitting in the dark, sipping tea. 

“Master, are you okay?” She asked, taking a step towards her mentor. 

“Do you feel it, Siri?” Adi asked, her voice soft. 

Siri sat in one of the chairs, wishing her eyes would adjust to the darkness so she could see her Master’s face. “The disturbance in the Force? Yes, it’s awful.” 

“Something has happened.” She stated, her voice attempting to remain calm. 

Siri felt herself swallow back her nerves. “Do you think it is because of the Sith?”

Despite the dark room Siri could feel her Master’s eyes snap in her direction. “Who told you about the Sith?”

“Master, I heard you say something to Master Plo.” Siri confessed. “Is it true, have the Sith returned?”

Adi reached out and took Siri’s hand. “We don’t know Padawan. A mysterious creature trained in the Jedi arts attacked Master Jinn on Tatooine.” Siri could sense her Master take a deep breath to calm her nerves which did not help Siri feel any better. “It would stand to reason that this dark Force-user would follow the Queen back to Naboo. It is likely the cause of the disturbance.” 

Siri’s heart lurched. ‘Obi-Wan,’ 

As if able to read her Padawan’s thoughts Adi squeezed her hand. “Be mindful of your feelings Siri, we do not yet know what has happened therefore worrying about hypotheticals do nothing but cloud our judgment.” 

“Yes Master.” 

A small red light began to flash from the comlink on the coffee table. Adi took one final sip of her tea and rose to her feet. “That will be a Council summons.” She reached out and gently untangled the Padawan braid out of Siri’s fingers (a nervous habit Siri had developed as a child was wrapping the pleated bit of hair between her fingers). “I want you to try and go back to sleep, young one. I promise I will contact you if I hear anything about him.” 

Siri was about to protest, but her concern for Obi-Wan in that moment outweighed her need to be viewed as the perfect Jedi. “Thank you Master.” 

She decided there was no use in worrying so she’d try to take her Master’s advice, but Siri knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep so she decided to try and meditate. As she headed into her room she wasn’t surprised to see her com flashing. She picked it up to see a text from Bant. 

/Are you awake?/

/Yes, I feel it too./ Siri replied.

/I’m worried about Obi-Wan./

/I know, me too.../ Siri then deleted that text and instead wrote. /The Council is meeting now, I’ll let you know if I hear anything./

/Thanks Siri./

/No worries Bant. See you tomorrow./

Siri took the Lotus position and attempted to clear her mind and send her anxieties into the Force. The suffocating feeling within the Force seemed to have dissipated, however she could sense intense grief. It was so strong that she found herself struggling to breath, she quickly brought herself out of her meditation. 

She stretched and looked at the chrono next to her bed, despite the disturbances she felt within the Force she had meditated for over an hour. The sun was just beginning to break over the horizon in the early morning sky. She suddenly heard a knock at her bedroom door, she rose to her feet to answer it and saw the exhausted and terribly sad face of her Master staring back. 

Her heart thumped loudly in her chest. “Master, what is it?”

“The dark force-user was on Naboo, Master Jinn and Padawan Kenobi engaged it in combat in order to save the Queen…” Adi began, and Siri could sense the sorrow through their bond. “The creature struck down Master Qui-Gon, he is now one with the Force.” 

Siri’s eyes went wide, Qui-Gon Jinn was a renowned Jedi Master, an imposing figure who no one could imagine being bested in a lightsaber duel. Her thoughts immediately went to his apprentice, if the Master had been slain then there was little hope her friend made it out. She closed her eyes, preparing herself for the news. 

“Padawan Kenobi was able to defeat the creature, he survived.” Adi placed a finger beneath Siri’s chin and caused her to look up. “He’s okay Siri.” 

Without thinking the blonde Padawan threw her arms around her Master, relief flooding her heart. But, then she realized that there was still a loss of life, and more to the point someone who was very important to both her Master and to her friend Obi-Wan. 

“Master, I’m so sorry...I know Master Qui-Gon was your friend.” She hugged her master tighter. 

Adi returned the hug, doing her best to release her grief into the Force. “Yes, he was Siri. I will mourn his loss, but will not miss him because he is in the loving embrace of the Force.” 

Siri bit her tongue, she didn’t want to point out that her Master’s tone didn’t sound very convinced. She instead released Adi from her hug and nodded. “Of course Master.” 

Adi offered her apprentice a sad smile. “I must go with the Council to Naboo. Master Jinn’s funeral will be held there, and the Council is also to investigate the dark-Force user.” She felt a shudder run up her spine as she spoke of him. “I will be back in a few days.” 

“Master, could I come?” Siri blurted out without thinking. She quickly chastised herself. 

“Siri, I’m not sure that would be appropriate, this is Council business.” Adi explained. 

“Of course, it’s just...I’d like to be there for Obi-Wan, as his friend.” Siri fidgeted with her sleep tunic.

Adi folded her arms across her chest. “As a friend?”

“Yes. As a friend.” Siri punctuated, but felt her cheeks flush. 

“I will permit it, but I need you to be mindful Siri, should you hear anything you disagree with please keep your objections to yourself until we have had a chance to discuss them.” Adi stated in her most serious tone, clearly this was something Siri struggled with. 

Siri did her best not to huff in response. “Yes Master.” 

The corners of Adi Gallia’s lips curled in a slight smile. “Get changed then Padawan, we leave in one hour.” 

Siri nodded and then turned back into her room to grab a fresh tunic and robe. She quickly grabbed her com and sent Bant a text, knowing full well that the Mon Calamari was still awake.

/Obi-Wan is okay!/

/What happened?/

Siri hesitated. /Can’t say much, but heading to Naboo with my Master and the Council./

/...Siri?/

/Master Jinn is one with the Force./

Bant’s response came after a few minutes. 

/Give him a hug for me?/

/I will./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
TBC


	2. Chapter 2 - Bant's plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The friends all worry about Obi-Wan and try to figure out how to help.

Siri glanced down the huge, gaping hole in the middle of the reactor chamber, doing everything in her power to shield her emotions from the Jedi Council. The Force still hung heavy in the room, echoes of pain and darkness. She closed her eyes and it was as if the Force replayed a moment for her, a haunting and tragic scream seemed to bounce off the walls, one she knew that belonged to her friend. A much calmer version of that voice suddenly brought her out of her thoughts. 

“Then the assassin fell down the shaft.” Obi-Wan Kenobi was giving a report to the Council, Siri noticed that his voice sounded distant and detached. 

Mace Windu looked down the pit. “And where does this lead?” 

“That leads to a waste disposal unit,” The Captain of the Queen’s guard answered. “It automatically is collected and shipped to Lotho Minor.” He continued as if sensing the Jedi Council's next question. “Unfortunately by the time we learned about what transpired here a shipment had already left, we were unable to recover the entire body of the assassin.” 

This was met by a raised eyebrow from more than one member of the Council. 

“...only his lower half was found.” The Captain stated, a mild amount of disgust was evident in his voice. 

At that moment, all of the other Jedi in the room turned and looked at Obi-Wan in unison, various emotions on their faces ranging from shock, to anger, to concern. For his part Kenobi was doing his best to look stoic and calm, a mask he defaulted to whenever he wanted to hide his true emotions. A mask Siri became very familiar with after the Fry mission. 

“You failed to mention something, Padawan Kenobi.” Ki-Adi-Mundi stated, not questioned.

“As you know Masters, the final blow which caused the assassin to fall was fatal. What I neglected to mention was that I severed his torso.” Obi-Wan’s eyes never left a specific spot on the floor. 

Siri felt her breath catch and the Council members looked between one another. Mace Windu stepped towards the Apprentice. 

“Padawan Kenobi, you are aware that the Sai Tok move is forbidden.” The Master of the Order calmly yet sternly stated. “Because of its association with the Dark Side.”

Obi-Wan didn’t flinch. “Yes Master.” 

Nothing more was said on the matter and Mace Windu just placed a hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder and squeezed. After another moment of tension Plo Koon addressed the room. 

“Was there anything else?” The Kel Dor Master asked. 

The Captain of the Guard looked towards Kenobi who remained quiet, looking at the same spot on the floor. “Once the throne room was secure I ran here with my team only to find Padawan Kenobi holding Master Jinn’s boy.” 

“Was there anything else you needed to add to the report Padawan?” Even Piell asked. 

Obi-Wan, still unable to take his eyes from the spot on the floor shook his head. “Not much more to tell Masters, Qui-Gon…” his eyes closed briefly. “Master Jinn’s wound was fatal, he died right after I defeated the assassin.” 

Yoda tilted his head curiously. “Something else to say you have Obi-Wan.” 

He finally turned to face the Jedi Council, squaring his shoulders as if he was prepared for another battle. Siri could see the pain in his eyes despite the mask of calm, Obi-Wan’s eyes always gave him away.

“His final order before he became one with the Force was that I train the boy from Tatooine.” Obi-Wan stated, his voice never wavering. “Therefore I will be taking Anakin Skywalker as my Padawan learner.” 

Siri couldn’t believe her ears, it was only a short time ago that Obi-Wan had been all but cursing the slave boy from the remote desert planet. He had been passed over by his Master in favor of training Skywalker, he had been deeply hurt by this and now he was taking it upon himself to train the boy? Siri felt anger rise up inside of her at the sheer audacity of Qui-Gon for placing such a burden on his shoulders. She did her best to release her anger into the Force.

“An apprentice you still are Obi-Wan, unable to take on one of your own.” Yoda exclaimed, even he looked surprised which Siri had never seen before. “Premature this discussion is.”

Obi-Wan took the time to look each of the Masters in the eyes before he spoke. “He used his dying breath to ask this of me, he held on while I fought that monster just to tell me this.” Siri could see his throat growing tight, he was using all of his training now not to fall apart in front of the Council. “Qui-Gon Jinn always believed in the will of the Force, for him to not say anything else…” his breath slightly caught, but he quickly pushed it down. “It must’ve been imperative to him to ensure that Anakin be trained.” 

Yoda stamped his gimmar stick on the cold floor and it echoed through the chamber.

Adi Gallia stepped towards Obi-Wan, her eyes full of sorrow, cutting off Yoda's thoughts. “Your Master had such faith in you Padawan Kenobi in order to trust you with this all important task.” She looked at her fellow Council members before continuing. “We will take all of this under advisement." She tried to offer an encouraging smile. 

"There is a holo-recording of the battle, if you would like to see it." Captain Panaka did his best to steer the conversation back to the reason they were in the room. 

Siri could feel Obi-Wan's panic through the Force, it was clear this was not missed by the Council members either. Plo Koon stepped forward and placed a clawed hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder.

"Thank you for your report Obi-Wan, I am sure it wasn't easy for you." He offered a sad smile, though it was hard to tell with his mask. "You are dismissed for now. Attend your Master and ready him for his rites." 

Obi-Wan bowed and exited the reactor chamber as quickly as he could without running. Siri watched him leave and then locked eyes with her Master. Adi motioned with her head for Siri to go after her friend, she didn’t hesitate and followed him out onto the catwalks just outside. 

Once out of sight from the Council Siri picked up her speed to try and catch up to him. “Obi-Wan, wait!”

She then watched as her friend fell to his knees, holding his head. She rushed to his side just in time to watch him lose the contents of whatever little food he had eaten. She reached out and pulled his Padawan braid away from his face and rubbed his back as he heaved again. After a moment he leaned back on his knees, and used his sleeve to wipe the sick from the corners of his mouth. 

“Karabast,” he moaned. 

Siri looked back towards the reactor chamber, she caught a glimpse of Master Yoda who just nodded sadly to her. 

“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” She then helped Obi-Wan to his feet. 

He motioned to the vomit now dripping down the side of the catwalk. “I can’t just leave that.” 

“I’m sure the Queen has a droid that will take care of it, it’s the least they can do after you saved their planet.” Siri coaxed, but he didn't move. “I know you don’t want the Council to see you like this, let’s at least move off the catwalk.” 

He sadly nodded and allowed her to keep an arm around his waist as they headed back into the hanger. She walked him outside to the ledge of the building, figuring he could do with some fresh air. She sat him down on the side of the hanger just outside the door, leaning him against the wall. 

She took out a canteen that was on her belt and handed it to him. “Here,.” 

He took it gratefully and swished the water around his mouth before spitting it over the edge. He watched as it joined one of the various waterfalls that surrounded the palace. “Thank you,” 

Siri took the canteen and then tore a piece of her tunic, she poured the cool water over the fabric and proceeded to clean Obi-Wan’s face. His eyes were focused on the landscape around them. 

“It’s fitting that he became one with the Force here, this planet is teeming with life.” Obi-Wan’s breath hitched as he spoke. “It’s beautiful.” 

Siri poured more water on the piece of fabric and then looked up at the view. “Yes, it really is.” 

She placed the cool cloth on the back of his neck and he shuddered. She noticed silent tears falling down his cheeks, it was then that she took a good look at him. He had a large bruise beginning to form on his temple and another forming over his right eye, then there was the way he was favoring his left shoulder told her that he had been injured. 

“I can already guess the answer to this question, but have you seen a healer yet?” She asked. 

He didn’t take his eyes off the horizon and shook his head. “I’m fine.” 

She sat down next to him, hanging her feet over the ledge. “Are you?”

He finally turned to look at her and her heart shattered into a million pieces when she saw the look in his eyes. His bottom lip quivered, she could tell he was trying to stay composed in front of her. 

“Bant told me to give you one of these.” Siri stated softly and then enveloped him into a tight hug. 

Obi-Wan stiffened at first when Siri’s arms wrapped around him, but quickly all of his walls crumbled and he fell into the embrace, sobbing. Siri tightened the hug, placing one hand on the back of his head protectively. The two friends sat like that for almost an hour and Siri just let Obi-Wan feel whatever he needed to without a word. When he was finally spent Obi-Wan sat up and rubbed his eyes with his sleeves. 

“I’m sorry,” 

Siri shook her head. “Stop.” He looked at her in confusion. “I will not accept apologies from you for the next 48 hours.” She forced him to look at her. “Because I know you and you’re going to try to blame everything on yourself, and I just don’t have the patience to sit through that nonsense and tell you you’re wrong.”

The corners of his lips curled, it was the first resemblance of a smile she had seen on his face since she arrived on Naboo. “Thank you my friend.” 

“Anytime,”

She reached out and grabbed his hand, realizing this had been the first real (sober) intimate moment just the two of them in seven years. It was at that moment that Siri felt bad for putting a wedge between their friendship for all those years. They sat for a while longer before he rose to his feet. 

“I have to get back, I’ve left him alone too long.” He then helped her up and they both walked back into the hanger. 

Siri watched as her friend headed towards the palace, she wondered if the person he had left alone was Qui-Gon or Anakin. She sighed and pulled out her comlink.

“Hey Bant, yeah, it’s worse than we thought…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(2 weeks later)

“Someone to see you honey, Jedi by the looks of them.” The waitress droid called out in the middle of the busy diner in the center of CoCo Town on Coruscant. 

A large Besalisk looked up from behind the grill and offered a toothy grin in response. “Hey guys!”

“Hey Dex,” Garen Muln exclaimed.

“Oy’ Dex!” Quinlan Vos excitedly greeted the chef. 

“I believe you already have a booth in the back, you’ve kept the ladies waiting, which is never a good idea boys..” Dexter Jettster said with his lower extremities on his hips. “I’m guessing Nerf burgers all around?”

“You know us too well Dex!” Reeft nodded. 

The three Jedi moved towards the back of the diner, finding one of the larger booths occupied by two familiar females sitting across from one another. Bant was sipping on a photon fizz while looking out the window and Siri had a steaming cup of caf in front of her with her attention fully on a datapad. 

“Sorry to keep you waiting ladies, but I promise you it was worth it.” Quinlin stated in a sultry voice, slipping into the booth next to Siri. 

The blonde Jedi didn’t even look up from her datapad. “Oh thank the Force, our delicate female brains couldn’t handle being away from testosterone for so long.”

“Hey guys,” Bant simply said, rolling her eyes at Quinlan and Siri.

As Reeft and Garen took their spots in the booth next to Bant the waitress droid stopped by their table. “You want a cup of Jawa Juice?” 

“Yes Flo, thanks so much.” Garen answered for all of them. “Actually bring an extra would ya?” 

“You still think he’s going to show?” Quinlan asked, placing his arms on the back of the booth.

“Yeah, why not?” Garen asked.

“Have you been able to see him for longer periods than just passing in the hall over the last two weeks?” Siri interjected, glancing up from her datapad. 

“But, Anakin started classes today.” Bant interjected. “He should have time.” 

Flo had returned with four cups and placed them on the table, the three male Jedi accepted them gratefully, they toasted one another before taking a drink. 

“So, who’s Anakin?” Quinlan asked before taking another sip of his drink. 

“Obi-Wan’s apprentice.” Reeft answered softly. 

Quinlan slammed his cup down in shock. “Wait, what? Kenobi has a Padawan? Isn’t he a Padawan himself? What the hell did I miss when I was Tatooine?” 

“Slow down Quin before you have an aneurysm,” Siri calmly stated. “Obi-Wan’s been through a lot over the last couple of weeks.” 

Garen scoffed as he took another drink. “That’s putting it mildly.” 

“You heard about Master Jinn didn’t you?” Bant asked, her eyes looking sad. 

Quinlan adjusted in his seat. “Yeah, I had heard a Jedi was killed, didn’t know who it was till I got back last night though...real shame, I always liked Qui-Gon’s style.” 

“Well, apparently at some point during their last mission they were stranded on Tatooine. While Master Jinn was bargaining for the parts they needed to repair their ship he came across a boy who is incredibly Force sensitive.” 

“The kid who won the Bonta Eve Classic.” Quinlan raised his eyebrows as he took another sip. “Yeah, you could sense that brat’s presence a mile away.” He then leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table. “So wait, you’re telling me that Kenobi is now training that kid? He’s got to be like ten, he’s way too old!”

“It was Qui-Gon’s dying wish.” Siri finally put her datapad down on the table and looked at Vos. “His final words to Obi-Wan were begging him to promise to train the boy.” 

“Kriff. That's messed up.” 

“Those were my words exactly my friend.” Garen concurred. 

“How is the Council allowing this, I mean, Obi-Wan is still a Padawan.” Quinlan seemed to be trying to wrap his head around what he was hearing. 

“WAS a Padawan, he was knighted on Naboo.” Bant explained. “And that’s why we’re here. We’re going to celebrate his knighting.” 

“I keep telling you that he’s not going to want to celebrate Bant,” Siri interjected. “He didn’t even have the entire Council present when he had his braid cut, just Master Yoda. And then he had it burned with Qui-Gon.” 

“Yeah, I never thought I’d ever say this, but I agree with Tachi.” Garen looked over at Bant. “If he wanted the ceremony and feast he would’ve waited to cut his braid till he got back.” 

“If it were any of the rest of us Obi would want to celebrate, so, we’re celebrating.” Bant held a tone that told the group the topic was closed for discussion. 

The group sat in uncomfortable silence for a moment, each taking deliberate sips of their drinks. Their silence was interrupted by the sound of a booming voice over the regular diner noise. 

“Obi-Wan!” Dext exclaimed, happily. 

“Hello Dex,” the familiar Core accent replied in return. 

The friends all watched as the Besalisk enveloped Obi-Wan in a tight hug, wrapping all four arms around the young man’s slender frame. Obi-Wan awkwardly returned the hug, patting Dex on the back. 

“I was so sorry to hear the news my friend, I lit a candle in his honor.” Dex stated as he released Obi-Wan from his hug. “He was a good man, that Master of yours.” 

Obi-Wan nodded, his face once again a mask. “Thank you Dex,” 

The wise Besalisk had seen his fair share of grief and was able to read it easily on Obi-Wan despite the mask he was trying to portray. He smiled and clapped the Jedi on the back instead of lingering on the topic. “The others are in your usual booth, best not keep them waiting.” 

Obi-Wan offered a half smile, he was grateful that Dex changed the subject. “No, I best not.” 

“It’s good to see you kid,” Dex’s voice was softer. “My door is always open if you need anything.” 

He nodded in response, and then headed towards the crowded booth that contained his closest friends. He was greeted with various levels of excitement, several were too excited which Obi-Wan knew was really a form of sympathy. He had become a connoisseur in the way people responded to grief, most had no idea how to act around him these days. This was one of the reasons Obi-Wan had been avoiding long interactions with people. 

The four friends did their best to hide their concern as Obi-Wan approached them. To an outsider they wouldn’t be able to see the difference in Obi-Wan Kenobi other than the lack of his Padawan braid and ponytail, but to his friends he looked like a shell of his former self. His gate was slower - seemed almost heavy, his smile was no longer so bright that his dimples showed, his youthful face held a permanent 5-o'clock shadow, and the skin beneath his eyes were dark purple. 

Flo the waitress returned to their table. “They ordered you Jawa Juice, you want anything else?”

“Oh, actually just a cup of caf please Flo,” Obi-Wan stated. “And could you box my food to go?” 

The waitress nodded and then wheeled off in the direction of the caf dispenser. She returned a moment later and handed the mug to Obi-Wan who took it with a grateful smile. He did his best not to make eye contact with any of his friends. 

“You’re taking your burger to go?” Bant asked.

Obi-Wan nodded. “Yes, I’m honestly not hungry.” He raised a hand to stop Reeft from asking if he could have his meal. “I wanted to bring something back for Anakin, not sure if he’s ever had a Nerf burger before.” He adjusted his position on the bench. “Besides, I sadly can’t stay long.” 

“But, I thought since Anakin started classes you’d have at least an hour.” Bant complained.

Obi-Wan sighed. “I’d love to Bant, but I’m just too busy. Anakin is so far behind that I am actually spending a lot of my time developing a lesson plan with Master Plo, plus Master Nu has asked me to help update the archive with regards to the Sith I encountered, I need to stop by the Halls and see if they have anything that could help Anakin with his night terrors, I also have to find a reading tutor for Anakin…”

“The kid doesn’t read Basic?” Reeft asked. 

“Slave,” Garen said, but tried to disguise it as a cough which earned him a smack in the back of his head from Bant.

“He doesn’t read any language Reeft,” Obi-Wan said carefully, throwing an angry glance at Garen. “He, honestly, has had no schooling of any kind.” Obi-Wan took another sip from his caf. “It’s been quite challenging for him truth be told, he doesn't appreciate that he's stuck in classes with children half his age.” 

The five other Jedi did their best to hide their disappointment and concern. Most tried to change their focus on their drinks and Siri went back to working on her datapad. Quinlan picked up the extra cup of Jawa Juice and motioned it towards Obi-Wan. 

“Oh, no thank you my friend.” Obi-Wan stated, raising his mug. “I’m good, it’s all yours.” 

Quinlan shrugged and took a large gulp of the strong alcohol. “Don’t you two over achievers ever stop?” He motioned to the two Jedi he was sandwiched between. He then grabbed the datapad out of Siri’s hands. “Gods Tachi, we can’t even get you to look up from this damn thing.” 

“Voss, I’m not in the mood.” Siri exclaimed, trying to get her datapad back.

He kept his elbow up to keep her from grabbing the tablet. He stopped as he read over the information on the screen. “Krayn, why are you researching the pirate slave trader?” 

“Not that it’s any of your business, but the Council has asked me to prepare a detailed report.” She huffed as she was able to grab the datapad from his hands. 

Quinlan eyed her suspiciously. “That is someone you don’t want to mess with, the Council should know better.” He took a drink of Jawa Juice, seemingly lost in thought. “Even the Hutts are afraid of him.” 

“I have no idea why the Council needs this report, but they’ve asked for one on all the slave traders.” Siri explained. “Krayn is just one they have decided to single out for a more in depth look at how his operation works.” 

“Perhaps they were inspired to look into the various slavers in the galaxy after meeting Anakin.” Bant stated, taking a sip of her drink. “Maybe they are hoping this report will help convince the Senate to do more.” 

“Yeah, maybe…” Quinlan didn’t seem too convinced. 

“Okay, since we don’t have much time I’d like to propose a toast.” Bant said and all the friends lifted their drinks. 

Bant then began reciting the words used as a typical speech at a knighting feast, as Obi-Wan realized what she was doing he lowered his cup. As Bant continued into reciting the Jedi code, which was usually how the speeches she stopped herself from finishing and looked at Obi-Wan suddenly with sorrow in her eyes. 

“Go a head, finish it.” He calmly said.

“...there is no death, only the Force.” She felt a lump in her throat as she said the words. 

Garen, unable to take the tension, clinked his glass with Reeft and Quinlan’s. “Hey, congrats man. You’re going to make one hell of a knight.” 

‘I foresee you’ll be a great Jedi Knight.’

Obi-Wan seemed lost in his mug of caf as he recalled the words Qui-Gon had spoken. It was the best apology he could’ve expected from his former Master regarding him passing Obi-Wan up for Anakin. He then realized that felt so long ago to his weary mind, he closed his eyes briefly before looking back up at his friends. 

“I um...I forgot I’m late for an appointment.” He stated and slid out of the booth. He pulled out a few credits and tossed them on the table. “Reeft, you can have my burger, I’ll bring Anakin here another time.” He then turned to leave and said over his shoulder. “Thank you for the sentiment my friends, it wasn’t lost on me.” 

They watched as he waved to Dex before ducking out through the door. They saw him walk past them in the window, he placed his hood over his head, hiding his face. One by one the friends turned back to look at each other. 

“Well, that went well.” Garen said after a moment. 

“I told you,” Siri replied. “You should’ve seen him during the celebration on Naboo, he looked like he wanted to crawl out of his skin. Any form of recognition or accolades and he withdraws into himself, like he feels guilty.”

“Being the first Jedi to kill a Sith in 1,000 years can’t be helping with his aversion to recognition.” Reeft interjected, causing all his friends to look at him.

The waitress returned with their food and Reeft excitedly dove right in. The other friends seemed unable to eat, their thoughts remained on Obi-Wan. 

“Has he slept at all since Naboo?” Bant finally asked. 

“Sure didn’t look like it, he looked like Bantha crap.” Quinlan exclaimed, tossing a tuber fry into his mouth. “The man needs a good, hard kriff in order to release some tension…” he turned towards the blonde Jedi on his left “Tachi, looking at you.”

Siri felt her cheeks grow red and she reached out under the table to pinch Quinlan’s waist. She had made the drunken mistake of implying her feelings for Obi-Wan once to Kiffar, though with his retrocognition it wasn’t like she could hide it from him. That didn’t mean she wanted the entire group to know. 

Garen almost guffawed at this notion. “Please, there’s more of a chance you could sleep with Obi-Wan than Tachi.” 

Quinlan smiled and once again leaned his arms across the back of the booth. “Hey, I’m willing to take one for the team. Anything to help him.” 

Siri rolled her eyes, she sometimes couldn’t believe how brash Quinlan Vos was about certain things. He never seemed to act like a Jedi in Siri’s mind, and it bothered her. The rest of the friends groaned at Quinlan’s offer, Garen even threw a fry at him. 

“He has a point though.” Bant said after a moment.

“Who, the man who is always one drink away from sleeping with a droid?” Siri asked, motioning to Quinlan. 

“Don’t knock it till you try it,” Vos stated as he took a bite of his burger. 

Bant scrunched her face up in disgust at his answer, but then continued. “No, about helping Obi-Wan, he clearly needs it.” 

“He won’t accept our help, believe me I’ve offered.” Siri exclaimed. 

“I bet you have.” Quinlan leaned over to her and stated softly. 

“Okay, you get one more.” Siri whispered harshly in his ear. 

Bant thought for a moment before she spoke again. “Okay, so we help Anakin. You know that Obi-Wan won’t accept help for himself, but would never begrudge help for others who are suffering.” 

“Bant, you manipulative genius.” Garen said with pride. 

“How are we supposed to help his Padawan though?” Reeft asked between bites. 

“We find out what subjects he’s struggling with and we help tutor him.” Bant explained. “Also, we can help teach him about Obi-Wan, since we all know he’s so good about opening up. We’ll take turns, this way it’ll give Obi some time to himself.” 

The five friends all agreed to Bant’s plan with varying degrees of enthusiasm. Quinlan took notice that Siri was remaining mostly quiet. After they had all finished their meals Bant, Garen and Reeft left to head back to the Temple, leaving Quinlan and Siri alone. Vos moved to sit across from Siri and ordered another Jawa Juice. 

“You know it’s the middle of the afternoon.” Siri pointed to the drink. 

Quinlan shrugged and took a sip of his drink. “I’m on leave for a while, what else am I supposed to be doing?”

“I don’t know, practicing your saber forms or meditating.” Siri returned her gaze to the datapad. “Anything but getting sloshed in the middle of a weekday.” 

“Man, they are going to eat you alive.” He simply stated, taking another drink. 

“I’m sorry?”

“Krayn and his crew, they are going to eat you alive unless you learn to drop the perfect Jedi act.” Quinlan stated which caused Siri to look up from her datapad. 

“I...I um, don’t know what you’re talking about.” She tried to hide her nervousness. 

“Sure. Piece of advice Tachi. “You will have to become this persona, and I don’t mean to look like a different person or act like a different person, but instead you will have to become them and all of what that entails.” 

Siri rolled her eyes. “Thank you for the grand insight Vos, but I already knew that.”

He shook his head and suddenly became serious. “You will witness and partake in things that will go against EVERYTHING the Jedi Code stands for, you will have to stand by helpless or in worst case scenarios participate as innocent people are hurt or even killed…the only thing that matters is your assignment and you have to remember the bigger picture and focus on what kind of a difference the intel you gather will make. No matter the cost.” 

Siri sat back in the booth and slowly nodded. “I don’t think I’m ready.” 

“We never do, but it’s not our choice.” Quinlan replied. “It takes a special kind of Jedi to be able to pull these types of missions off. The Council must see something in you to assign it to you.” He took another drink and looked at her. “When were you knighted?”

“Two weeks ago, is it that obvious?”

Quinlan shrugged. “Just to me, but then again it’s my job to be able to read things in people that they don't want others to see.” He smiled. “It’s a skill that you’ll need to develop in this line of work.”

“Can you show me?”

“Sure thing Tachi.” He then offered her a sip of his drink. 

She hesitated and then grabbed it from his hand and took a sip, feeling the sour tasting liquid burn her throat. She handed the cup back, coughing. “Gods, I don’t know how you can stand that shit.” 

“If you’re going to become a pirate my dear you’re going to need to develop a much tougher pallet.” He laughed. 

She raised an eyebrow, challenging him. “Give me that.” She grabbed the cup and proceeded to drain the entire contents in one drink. “Better?”

“I might just see why the Council chose you for this mission.” He smirked. “So, when do you leave?”

She shrugged. “I’m not sure, they haven’t told me.” 

“That’s why you haven’t committed to Bant’s save Obi-Wan plan?” He asked as he leaned against the wall and placed his feet up on the booth bench.

“I can’t get involved in anything long term, I can’t start teaching the kid something only to leave in a few days.” She explained. 

“So, do something short term.” Quinlan gestured with his hands as he spoke. “Teach the kid how to cook or something. Hell, teach him how to make that god awful tea that Obi loves so much.” 

Siri chuckled to herself. “Sapphire, yeah that stuff is way too strong for me.”

“It can be the little things that help him out the most.” Vos stated, his voice softer than she was used to hearing it. “Besides, it’ll take your mind off this mission.” He moved the datapad away from her. “If I know you then I know you have all of this memorized already. Use this time to relax and prepare yourself mentally...do something that doesn't involve thinking about the upcoming mission, trust me, it helps.” 

Siri nodded and reached out to grab Quinlan’s forearm, she squeezed it gently. “Thanks Vos, who knew you had a heart?”

“Just don’t tell anyone Tachi,” 

********************  
TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The advice Quinlan gives her is almost identical to the advice Siri gives Obi-Wan before he leaves on the Rako Hardeen mission in one of my other stories called “Deception”. It’s not required to have read that one, but I wanted to give a little Easter egg for anyone who has read it. 
> 
> All of my other stories have been fully written before posting to the site, this one I’m writing as we go so not sure how quickly updates will be or how long this story will be - let’s just all enjoy the ride! 
> 
> Thanks again for any comments or Kudos!!


	3. Chapter 3 - Quinlan's Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quinlan and Siri meet Anakin.  
> Obi-Wan learns drinking and grief don't mix.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I have had this story in my mind for a while I finally was inspired to put it to paper after reading the beautifully written story by Meysun called “There is No Pain (I Tilled the Sorrows of Stone)”. I really recommend reading hers as well, you might be able to see where I incorporated the inspiration I took from their story.  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/23579242/chapters/56573209#workskin

Chapter 3:

In the early morning hours just before dawn Siri Tachi and Quinlan Vos made their way back to the Jedi Temple. They hadn’t planned on spending the rest of the day and evening together, but after a few more drinks at Dex’s Diner the rest of the day moved at a fast paced blur and before they knew it the day was gone. 

Quinlan offered tips and tricks to help Siri for her upcoming undercover mission, including using a special Force ability that Quinlan called Sense Motive, it was what Jedi Shadows used to discover when a person is hiding something or not being entirely truthful. It was an ability frowned upon by most of the Jedi because of the implications of impacting free will. It hovered very close to a dark side ability to read minds. Quinlan had explained that there were many abilities she would have to adopt in order to survive her mission that skirted the line between light and dark, and she’d have to find a way to come to terms with going against the Jedi Code. 

“Thinking of becoming a Shadow?” Quinlan asked, his arm around Siri’s shoulders as they made their way up the temple stairs. 

Siri chuckled. “I think that’s putting the cart before the Dewback Quinlan,” 

“I don’t know, you picked up Sense Motive very quickly Tachi, I think you’d fit right in.” Vos stated with a hiccup and Siri could smell the alcohol on his breath. 

“It’s never something I ever considered, I always pictured myself taking on a Padawan in a few years, you know focusing on diplomatic missions...” She placed a hand on his chest to steady her intoxicated friend. 

“Maybe be on the Council one day?” He snickered.

Siri felt her cheeks flush. “I...I never said that,” 

Quinlan smirked. “Sounds too conventional, seriously Tachi no offense but I don’t see you as Council material.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She pushed him off her shoulders, angrily. 

“I mean that in a good way!” He raised his hands up defensively. “Come on, could you see yourself spending hours or sometimes days stuck in that stuffy chamber debating and meditating as a group?” 

Siri shook her head. “Force, no...that sounds like my own personal hell.” 

“Exactly!” Quinlan clapped her on the back as they entered the large temple doors. “I don’t even like giving mission reports, can you imagine having to listen to them?” 

Siri and Quinlan shared a laugh that was louder than it should’ve been given the hour. They shushed one another as they noticed the hard stares coming from the two Temple Guards at the door. 

“Hey, you know who’d actually be perfect for the Council?” Siri said with a slight tipsy slur. 

“Ofy-Wan?” Quinlan giggled.

Siri’s mouth dropped at the use of Kenobi’s childhood nickname and smacked Vos on the arm. “Don’t let him hear you call him that, Vos, you’re a terrible person!” 

“Is he talking about Master Obi-Wan?” A small voice interrupted their giggles.

Quinlan and Siri both startled by the new voice jumped and turned quickly around to come face to face with a young boy standing behind them wearing initiate sleep clothes. His eyes looked sleepy and his sandy blonde hair was sticking up on one side as if he’d been laying on it. He rubbed his eyes as he looked up at them. 

“How in the nine-Correlian Hells does a kid with that bright of a Force signature and limited shields sneak up on us?” Quinlan leaned in to whisper to Siri. 

Siri smacked Vos again and knelt in front of the boy. “Anakin, what are you doing wandering the halls so late?” She decided it best to ignore the fact that he heard them use the nickname that used to terrorize his Master. 

“I had a nightmare and woke up, but Master Obi-Wan wasn’t there.” The boy sniffed as he spoke. “And then I got lost looking for him.” 

“This place can be a bit of a maze sometimes,” Siri softly stated, placing her hand on Anakin’s shoulder. 

The young boy nodded. “The temple is so big, Obi-Wan...Master Obi-Wan gave me a tour, but I still get turned around all the time.” 

It was Quinlan’s turn to kneel next to Anakin. “You know I saw you win at Bonta Eve.” 

“You did!?” Anakin’s eyes went wide.

“Yeah, saw it on the holonews, I was on Tatooine myself for another mission.” Quinlan smiled. 

“Were you there to free the slaves?” Anakin became hopeful. 

Siri and Quinlan exchanged glances. “No, um...I was there for something else.” 

Anakin hung his head and sniffed again. “Oh, I see.” 

The two Jedi Knights exchanged glances again, they weren’t sure how much they should really get into Jedi politics with the child in the middle of the night without his Master’s permission. So, they decided to try and distract him. 

“Quinlan is a Jedi Shadow.” Siri exclaimed. 

“What’s that?” Anakin looked at Quinlan, suddenly very interested. 

“Well, basically I get intel on bad people and bring it back to the Council, like smugglers and crime lords...also, if it’s a good day I get to track down things pertaining to the Dark Side to destroy them.” Quilan tried to explain his extremely complicated job. 

Anakin’s eyes grew wide again. “Wow, that’s so wizard.” 

“Yes, yes it IS so wizard Anakin.” Quinlan pointedly turned to Siri as he spoke. “It’s a very important job in the Jedi order, not everyone can do it.” 

Siri rolled her eyes. “Laying it on a little thick aren’t you Quin?” She turned back to Anakin who was yawning. “Come on kid, let’s get you back to bed.” 

“But what about Master Obi-Wan?” He asked, concerned. “What if he’s in trouble, what if the Sith came back for him?” 

“Is that what your nightmare was about?” Siri asked, softening her features. 

Anakin nodded. “I saw him, he said he was going to keep Master Obi-Wan alive so that way Obi-Wan would suffer like he suffered.” The boy looked down at the ground. “...there were two of them, and they had him, he was hurt really bad. I know Master Obi-Wan says that dreams pass in time, but it was just so real.” 

“Well kid, normally I’d say it might be a vision, but your master killed that son of a womp rat.” Quinlan smiled down at Anakin. “Sliced him right in half.” 

“Nice Quin, real nice.” Siri huffed, placing her thumb and forefinger to the bridge of her nose.

“How do you know the difference between a vision and a dream?” Anakin asked. 

“Your Master will help you figure that out, not every Jedi gets visions.” Siri explained. “But there are techniques to figure out which are which.” 

“I didn’t know there would be so much learning,” Anakin admitted. 

“Yeah, it’s not easy being a Jedi.” Siri said, squeezing his shoulder. 

“Not everyone can do it, kind of like not everyone can win a podrace.” Qinlan added.

“I’m the first human ever to win!” Anakin beamed with pride. 

Siri rose to her feet, keeping her hand on Anakin’s back. “Come on, tell us all about it while we head back to your room.” 

*******************  
Siri glanced up from her datapad for the countless time towards the door. She and Quinlan had been with Anakin for over two hours with no sign of his Master. She glanced over to the other side of the couch and saw the boy resting comfortably while leaning against Quinlan Vos. Siri sighed and rose to her feet, unable to stay put. 

“You’re not ditching me with the kid are you?” Quinlan whispered. 

“It’s been over two hours, what if there really is something wrong?” Siri whispered back. “I’m going to go look for him.” 

Quinlan carefully sat up and then positioned Anakin to lay down on the couch. He covered the boy with a blanket. “Force, that kid is like a million degrees,” he wiped the sweat that had collected on his brow. “Look, of the two of us, who is the better tracker?”

Siri huffed and folded her arms. “Fine, I’ll stay.” She then looked around the disheveled room, particularly noticing the piles of clothing scattered around. “And maybe run a mop through here... this IS Obi-Wan’s apartment right?”

Qinlan carefully avoided knocking into the coffee table that was full of empty mugs and discarded datapads. “It looks like he’s been living in the common room, but even still this is not typical neat freak Kenobi.” He picked up a stained tunic that had obviously been used to mop up a spill. 

Siri turned and moved towards the Master’s bedroom, she opened the door and realized nothing had been touched since Qui-Gon Jinn had last been there. The only evidence of any change was two weeks worth of dust that had collected on the various items in the room. 

“Kriff.” Siri said quietly as her eyes scanned the room. 

Quinlan jumped over the back of the couch and met up with her. “Ah, so he hasn’t moved in yet.” 

“No, he’s refusing to move Qui-Gon out” Siri said as she felt her throat tighten. After a moment she sighed and looked up at her friend. “Vos, he’s either in one of the salles destroying training probes or you’ll find him at the bottom of a Corellian Whiskey bottle.” 

“Yep.” Quinlan agreed. “I’ll text you when I find him.” 

“Thanks Quin.” 

Quinlan quietly exited the apartment, leaving Siri alone with the now snoring Anakin Skywalker. She walked up to look at the boy and noticed he was shivering, she grabbed another blanket off the back of one of the old leather arm chairs and tucked it around the nine year old. She then began gathering mugs that were stained with leftover tea. 

“Where’s a cleaning droid when you need one?” She whispered to herself as she carried the dishes towards the sink.

********  
Quinlan Vos listened to the Force as he made it down along the dim walkway of the lower levels of Coruscant. He found himself being guided to a familiar yet shabby establishment in the Slum District called Trueping’s. He had experience in this bar because it was one the Jedi Council often used to set up undercover missions, Quinlan chuckled and wondered (not for the first time) why the Force had such a messed up sense of humor. 

He strode inside as if he owned the establishment, but carefully concealing his lightsaber beneath his cloak. The Jedi were not typically a favorite in the Slum District, mix that fact with people drinking heavily and it usually meant it wasn’t the best idea to call attention to being one. His keen eyes scanned the dark bar, attempting not to be distracted by the various scantily clad ladies who were inconspicuously looking in his direction. He then found a familiar face sitting at the end of the bar, alone. Quinlan was glad that his friend was smart enough not to dress like a Jedi while visiting this area of Coruscant, but then grew concerned that he seemed to be there without any protection at all. 

The Anacondan behind the bar was familiar with Vos, though neither made an effort to point that out. Quinlan just held up two fingers and the slippery bartender began pouring a bright blue liquid into two small shot glasses. As he approached his friend he saw that he was sipping a Corellian Whiskey on the rocks, Quinlan chucked to himself. 

‘Damn, Tachi called it.’ 

He didn’t disturb Obi-Wan and simply sat down on the stool next to him, leaning on the bar with his elbows. He did a peripheral scan of the newly Knighted Jedi sitting beside him, and admired his forest green long sleeve shirt that was tucked into a pair of black pants, the ensemble was completed with a pair of knee high black boots. Quinlan raised an eyebrow, he knew that Obi-Wan had picked out this outfit to try and blend in, but it was definitely drawing the attention of several of the female (and male) patrons in the bar. He chuckled to himself again. 

“So, who sent you after me, was it Bant?” Obi-Wan finally acknowledged the other Jedi’s presence.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m just here for a drink.” Vos answered, thanking the bartender who had just placed down the two shot glasses. “You’re a grown kriffing man Obi-Wan, I’m not here to babysit you.” Quinlan took one shot. 

Obi-Wan scoffed, and took a deliberate long drink from his glass. 

“But, in the future if you’re going to run out in the wee hours of the night to a less than friendly establishment you might want to make sure you arrange a babysitter for your kid.” Vos said as he took the other shot.

Obi-Wan’s eyes went wide in a mixture of horror and guilt. “He...he was sound asleep.”

“Obi…” Quinlan finally looked at him, giving a face that few had ever seen on the usually irreverent Knight. “You know better man. You above most know what it’s like to have a Master who was, well for lack of a better term let’s say distant at the start of an apprenticeship.” 

“Don’t. Quinlan, don’t.” 

Quinlan put up his hands in a defeated gesture. “Hey, I’m not trying to speak ill of the dead. I get it Obi, I do.” He quietly used the Force to move Obi-Wan’s drink out of reach as he spoke. “But let’s face it you guys struggled in the beginning because he wasn’t processing his own grief. Don’t put another kid through it.” He clapped Obi-Wan on the shoulder. “Don't worry so much, you got this.” 

“I...shit.” He hung his head and then suddenly rose up from the stool, knocking it over. “Anakin… I have to get back before he wakes up.” 

Vos didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was too late, he instead helped steady his friend who wasn’t able to keep his balance. When he realized that Obi-Wan was too drunk to stand let alone walk Quinlan picked up the ginger haired Knight and flung him over his shoulder. 

“Quinlan...don’t need help.” His words slurred together as he spoke.

Quinlan smirked. “Clearly.” 

As Quinlan carried Obi-Wan out of the bar and towards his speeder then sent Siri a text through their personal coms. 

/Found him/

/Bar or Salle? My bet was on bar/

/We should take you to Canto Bight with those betting instincts Tachi/

/...is he ok?/

/Not sure yet/

/Does he need to go to the Halls?/

/Nah, just needs to sleep it off/

/I’ll make up the bed/

***  
The sun had barely crested over the horizon when Siri Tachi was finally able to make it back to her quarters. She was exhausted both physically from cleaning as well as emotionally from taking care of Anakin who had woken up two more times with night terrors. She was thankful that during the last one Obi-Wan had been sober enough to wake up and take over comforting the boy, he had insisted they needed privacy and she should go home for some rest. It was one of the first times in her life that she didn’t argue with him. 

As she palmed the door lock she sensed that her Master was already awake. That wasn’t anything new, Adi typically had to rise early due to Council business, but Siri could also feel another presence in the apartment, one that felt slightly unbalanced. Siri decided she’d try to sneak in, hoping she wouldn’t disturb whatever was going on. 

“Explain to me again Master Gallia why another team wasn’t dispatched if there was even the slightest possibility this had been a Sith Lord?” A booming accented voice stated in a measured yet accusatory tone. 

“There was not sufficient evidence that the assassin was a Sith until after our investigation on Naboo.” Adi explained, her tone calm. “There was no need in the Council’s minds to dispatch another team. Master Jinn and Padawan Kenobi were more than capable…”

“And yet Qui-Gon is dead.” 

Adi sighed sadly. “And the entire Council mourns his loss with you Yan.”

Siri peeked around the corner and saw the distinguished Master Dooku in a heated debate with her Master. They were on the couch which was directly in her path to her room, she knew there would be no way to avoid being seen. She contemplated leaving and heading to the Room of a Thousand Fountains when her presence was noticed. 

“I see that Senior Padawans still enjoy sneaking out all night.” Dooku huffed, glancing over in Siri’s direction. “Come here child, there is no need to pretend you weren’t eavesdropping.” 

Siri hesitated and then moved into their line of vision, she bowed. “Master Dooku, how kind of you to pay us a visit.” She then looked at Adi. “Master my apologies, I was…”

Adi lifted a hand to stop her from continuing. “There is nothing to apologize for Padawan.” She looked back at Dooku, her eyes narrowed. “I know you and your friends are spending time with Knight Kenobi.” She looked back at Siri. “How is he Siri?”

Siri looked between her Master and Dooku, not sure exactly what to say. “As well as can be expected Master, both he and his apprentice are settling in I think.” 

Dooku huffed. “And that’s another thing, how could the Council even conceive that it’s a good idea for Obi-Wan to take on an apprentice so early, let alone one with so many challenges? The boy was an apprentice himself less than a month ago, he’s clearly not ready.”

Siri felt herself stiffen, the protective side of her wanted to defend her friend. Luckily Adi beat her to it. 

“Knight Kenobi is the first Jedi in over 1,000 years to defeat a Sith, he is more capable than most senior Knights.” Adi rebutted, her voice remaining calm. “He is of your lineage, do you doubt his training so much?” 

Yan Dooku sighed, his lineage was something that was of great pride to him (despite Jedi not supposed to take pride in such things). “Qui-Gon coddled the boy, it concerns me that he isn’t prepared for such responsibilities.” 

Siri couldn’t stop the scoff from escaping her lips. 

“Do you have something to say Padawan Tachi?” Dooku turned to look at her. 

She realized she should back down, he was a Master and therefore higher ranking than she was, but she couldn’t stop herself. “If you consider abandoning a thirteen year old on a war torn planet coddling then I worry what you think stern discipline is.” 

Much to Siri’s (and Adi’s) surprise this received a chuckle from the older Master. “A quick tongue this one has, it will get her into trouble one day” 

Adi glanced at her former apprentice and thought to herself. ‘It already has.’

Dooku returned his attention to the Council Member. “Regardless, I do believe Skywalker should be reassigned to another Master. I would like to formally petition the Council this request.” 

“No, you can’t!” Siri blurted out, causing the two Masters to look at her again. 

“Padawan, maybe you should go to your room now.” Adi cut her off from saying anything further. “This is Council business.” 

Siri narrowed her gaze to Dooku, but bowed again respectfully. “Of course, Master.” 

Once she was through the door to her room Siri stayed next to it in hopes of hearing the remainder of the conversation. She worried what would happen to her friend if they took away the last remaining tie he had to his late mentor. 

“You weren’t at his funeral Yan,” Adi seemed to completely change the subject.

This caught the normally stoic Jedi off guard. “I...I was hunting Sith artifacts in Wild Space. I couldn’t get away. You know duty comes before personal feelings.” 

“Qui-Gon’s dying words to Obi-Wan were begging him to promise that he would train Skywalker.” Adi softly explained. 

“Damn stubborn fool.” Dooku shook his head. “But, that is expected behavior of my late apprentice, what I don’t understand is why the Council agreed to it, Kenobi is far too young.” 

Adi sighed. “It was...is a split decision. But, ultimately we had to trust the will of the Force. It is clear that Kenobi and Skywalker’s fates are intertwined. For better or worse. And I think that Qui-Gon saw that before any of the rest of us did.” 

“It is a lot to place on the shoulders of one so young.” Dooku stated, remorseful. 

Adi nodded. “The Force will never ask more of us than we’re capable of.” 

Dooku’s eyes narrowed as he looked at her. “But, the Council will. The Code will. The Republic will.” 

“Yan, you should go and pay him a visit.” She softened her voice. “He is your Grand-Padawan after all.”

“Qui-Gon made it very clear he didn’t want me anywhere near his precious Padawan, not after that mess with Xanatos.” Dooku’s voice had a hint of sorrow behind the dulcet tones. “I suppose both young Obi-Wan and I have been made to keep unreasonable promises at Qui-Gon’s request.”

With that Dooku rose to his impressive height and bowed towards the Council Member. Adi stood and nodded her head in response. 

“The Council looks forward to your report on what you found in Wild Space.” She decided to change the subject back to formalities.

Dooku spoke over his shoulder as he headed for the door. “There was nothing to report, just false rumors of a Sith planet. Besides, I have an appointment today with Master Sifo-Dyas which will occupy most of my short leave here at the Temple I’m afraid.” 

Adi nodded then called after him. “Do reconsider visiting Obi-Wan, I’m sure he’d love to meet you.” 

“I have no doubt that our paths will cross one day Master Gallia, I’m just not sure I’m ready yet.” Dooku admitted. 

“I understand.” 

As soon as Dooku exited the apartment Siri stepped outside her room. She noticed her Master looked just as tired as Siri felt. 

“Master, would you like some Caf?” She asked. 

“That would be lovely Siri, thank you.” Adi replied. 

They sat in silence as Siri prepared a pot of the caffeinated beverage, she then brought a mug over to Adi. “Master, I’m sorry for staying out all night.”

“It’s alright Siri, you’re technically not a Padawan anymore, so unless it’s something the Council needs to know it’s technically no longer any of my business.” She took a sip and smiled up at her former apprentice. “How is Quinlan?” 

“How did you know I was with Quinlan?”

Adi shrugged. “Wild guess. I know he has a lot of experience undercover, I hope he was able to ease some of your tension regarding your assignment.”

Siri cocked an eyebrow, “Yes, it was very insightful.”

“Good, I’m glad.” Adi then moved towards her room. “I must get ready, the Council is meeting at 07:00.”

“Have a good day Master.” 

The Jedi Master stopped and Siri could see a slight slump in her shoulders. “Also, the Council would like you to report to the chamber at 19:00.”

Siri felt her heart in her throat. “Oh, so soon?” 

“Do you not feel ready?” Adi looked back over her shoulder. 

Siri’s thoughts lingered on Obi-Wan and how much she wanted to be there for him. But, she realized that she couldn’t let her personal feelings get in the way of her duty as a Jedi. 

“No Master, I am ready.” She answered. 

Adi offered a sad smile of approval. “At least one of us is, young one.” 

******  
TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I’m not 100% in love with this chapter, and I know it’s shorter than the others, but I felt we needed a transition between the last chapter and what’s happening next. 
> 
> I wasn’t planning on this also being a story about Siri preparing for her undercover mission, but chronologically it made sense and it adds another layer of tension to the whole thing.
> 
> Thanks for reading, and for all the comments & kudos!!


	4. Chapter 4 - Reading with Reeft

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reeft helps teach Ani how to read.  
> Bant teaches Ani how to swim.  
> Siri helps Obi-Wan with his training bond.

Chapter 4:

“Okay, this is a tougher word, just sound it out.” Reeft coached while pointing to the datapad screen. 

“Cah-zzz-mek…” Nine year old Anakin Skywalker attempted to read the screen in front of him while also eating breakfast. “Cah...Coz...Cosmic Force.” He beamed when he received a thumbs up from Reeft. 

“Very good Anakin, but perhaps we should do it without the scrambled Hawk-bat eggs in our mouth next time.” Obi-Wan grimaced as he picked up pieces of food off his robe that had flown out of his Padawan’s mouth. 

“Oh, sorry Master Obi-Wan,” Anakin exclaimed, still with his mouth full. 

Obi-Wan couldn’t help but smile at the young boy. “Go ask the kitchen for a wet rag to clean this up Padawan.” 

Anakin jumped from his seat and ran towards the kitchen, almost knocking a couple of Knights down in the process. 

“Anakin, slow down…” Obi-Wan sighed and turned back to Reeft after it was clear Anakin didn’t hear him. “That boy is always on the move,” 

“Welcome to the next fifteen years of your life.” The Dressellian Jedi laughed while taking a big bite of his breakfast pastry. 

Obi-Wan shook his head while he picked up his mug of tea. “Longer if I can’t get him caught up in his studies.” He tilted his head towards Reeft. “You sure you don’t mind helping him with reading?” 

“I’m happy to help.” Reeft answered automatically. “Master Ibes was injured on our last mission so we’re stuck at the Temple for a while. It’ll give me something to do.” 

Obi-Wan tilted his head in concern. “Is he going to be alright?”

“Yeah, he just needs to get through physical therapy. He’ll recover.” Reeft then looked down at the table. “I guess I shouldn’t be complaining, least of all to you.”

The ginger haired Knight suddenly grabbed his tea mug between both hands, needing it to steady himself. “Reeft, no, please. Just because…” He swallowed the lump in his throat before continuing. “Don’t feel like you can’t talk to me about your Master.” He looked at his friend. “I need at least something familiar in my life right now.” 

Reeft offered a sympathetic smile and Obi-Wan took a drink of his tea.

“Please let me know if Anakin gets to be too much.” Obi-Wan said, putting his mug on the table.

“Nah, he’s a bright kid Obi.” Reeft plopped the last of his pastry into his mouth. “He’ll catch up sooner than you think.”

Obi-Wan nodded as he stole a piece of bacon off Anakin’s plate. “I have no doubt of that my friend, he absorbs all of his lessons like a sponge.” 

As he tore the piece of bacon in half and placed one of the halves into his mouth Anakin ran up to the table with a damp cloth in his hand. Obi-Wan and Reeft looked up and saw Siri Tachi coming up behind the young apprentice with a travel cup of caf in one hand and a datapad in the other. 

“Look who I found!” Anakin excitedly said, then noticed Obi-Wan eating from his plate. “Hey, you said you didn’t want any breakfast Master Obi-Wan!” 

Obi-Wan, not missing a beat, looked at his young charge. “It’s your job to be able to sense when I’ve changed my mind, my very young apprentice.” 

Anakin’s eyes went wide in disbelief, he then looked between Siri and Reeft who were shaking their heads with a smirk. He looked back at his Master who took an exaggerated final bite of the bacon and offered the boy a smile and Anakin shot back with arms folded across his chest.

“This is why I don’t eat in the Refectory anymore Anakin,” Siri exclaimed, placing a hand on her hip. “These two will always steal from your plate when you’re not looking, never leave unattended food in their presence.”

“Did you just instruct my Padawan not to trust me?” Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow and was met by Siri loudly slurping her caf and avoiding eye contact. Kenobi turned his attention back to Anakin. “Tell you what Anakin, you clean up the mess you made while I grab an entire plate of bacon just for you...and Reeft.” 

Anakin nodded enthusiastically and began wiping down the table. Obi-Wan rose to his feet and motioned for Siri to walk with him. 

“Oh, guess I’m not avoiding a lecture afterall.” She smirked and followed him back towards the kitchen line. 

Once they were out of earshot from his young charge Obi-Wan turned to look at his friend. “You look tired.” 

“You’re one to talk.” 

He let out a small chuckled beneath his breath. “Touche.” 

“How’s your head?” She asked

“Not the worst hangover I’ve ever had, but still not great.” He admitted. 

“Gods, the worst for me had to have been the day after…” She tried to recall

“Garen’s 25th birthday?” He asked and she nodded. “Yeah, me too.” 

The two friends shared a laugh which caused Obi-Wan to have to rub his temples and groan. Siri sympathetically patted him on the shoulder. As they moved through the line Obi-Wan began to fill a plate with fruit and bread for himself and another with bacon for Anakin. 

“Thank you by the way,” he said after a moment. “For taking care of Anakin last night.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” 

He stopped and looked at her. “No, some worries, some definite worries.” He sighed. “Please don’t let me do something so irresponsible again.” 

Siri was taken back by the seriousness of his tone, she knew asking for help was not typical behavior for the newly knighted Jedi. “Well, I’ll do my best, but I do have a life outside the Temple you know.”  
“Do you?” Obi-Wan gestured to the datapad in her arms. 

She decided to ignore his implications and changed the subject back to Anakin. “Listen, just because you’re a Master doesn’t mean you can’t go out and have fun. Don’t beat yourself up so much. Next time…”

“There won’t be a next time Siri.” 

She decided to grab a fruit parfait since she was already there. She placed the datapad in her tunic pocket. “It’s just odd that you couldn’t tell he was awake through your bond.”

He kept his eyes forward, his face neutral but she could see the tension in his jaw. “We don’t have a training bond yet.” 

“Obi-Wan that’s like Padawan 101, even I know that.” She watched his face carefully as she spoke. “Why haven’t you set up the bond yet?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” He firmly stated. 

“Obi-Wan Kenobi, look at me.” 

He was hesitant to turn to face her, when he did she could see fear in his eyes. Even though she couldn’t sense anything because his shields were tighter than she’d ever felt from him she knew he didn’t want to discuss the reasons in the middle of the Refectory. She nodded in understanding and reached out to squeeze his elbow in support. 

As they picked up their food to head back to the table Obi-Wan noticed that Bant had joined them. He leaned over and whispered to Siri before they were in earshot of the group. 

“I know you’ll be straight with me,” his voice was no-nonsense. “What is Bant up to?”

Siri’s lips curved into a small smile. “She has everyone joining forces to help out with Anakin.” 

He stopped and sighed. Siri had to turn back and grabbed his arm. 

“I don’t need any help.” He insisted.

“You don’t have a choice in this I’m afraid.” She softly told him. “Besides, technically speaking we’re not helping YOU.” 

“Simantics Tachi,”

Siri smiled and ate a spoonful of her parfait. “Hey, it’s true, we’re helping Anakin...from a certain point of view.” 

“The worst, you really are the worst.” 

“Call it the will of the Force then. It’ll be better for everyone if you just trust it.” She smirked again and nudged him towards the table. “You up for a duel later?” 

He looked at her over his shoulder and teased. “After all of this? I look forward to wiping that smirk off your face.” 

“Yeah, we’ll see what you got Sith-killer.” Siri winked and then turned to leave as Obi-Wan made his way back to the table. 

He placed the plate of bacon in front of Anakin and Reeft and was not surprised to see both dive into it with gusto. Reeft’s metabolism was off the charts due to his species so he constantly needed to eat to keep his energy up, it was something Obi-Wan had grown up with and was used to. But Anakin’s appetite had surprised Obi-Wan the first few days. Then he realized that Anakin grew up never knowing when his next meal would be, so he always seemed to eat as if he was storing up the nutrients for a later famine. Obi-Wan knew he’d have to eventually say something, but with all the sudden changes in both their lives he didn’t have the heart to just yet. 

“Master Obi-Wan, um...she said...um…” he once again was speaking excitedly with his mouth full, pointing at Bant. 

“Bant,” the Mon Calamari reminded the boy of her name. 

“Bant said she can help me not be so cold all the time.” He took another bite of his breakfast, bouncing up and down in his chair. 

Obi-Wan put down his own piece of toast before speaking. “Anakin, you’re talking with your mouth full again, please be mindful.”

“Sorry Master Obi-Wan,” the child sat back in his chair and worked on chewing his food.

The older Jedi offered a small, encouraging smile to the boy and then rubbed his throbbing forehead before glancing over at his best friend. “So, I’m sorry, what is this about helping him to stay warm?”

“I’m going to bring him a sun lamp.” Bant said in her sweet tone. “It gives off natural light like a sun, but it also helps heat up the room.” 

Obi-Wan looked over at Anakin who was leaning over the datapad again with Reeft. “I was already going to ask for some heated blankets, but that’s a really great idea Bant.” 

Bant smiled and took a bite of her special dietary breakfast that looked and smelled like fish mush. “Yeah, I had to replace my humidifier recently in my room and I saw the sun lamps. When Anakin said he was cold I realized he’s used to desert weather.” 

Unable to keep his attention in one place Anakin turned to chime into their conversation, abandoning his reading lesson. “What’s a humidifier?”

“Oh, well you know how Tatooine is all one big desert?” Bant asked and Anakin nodded. “Well, I come from Mon Cala and it’s one big ocean.”

“Wooow,” Anakin seemed eager to learn more about a planet he’s never been to. 

“And Bant’s skin dries out very quickly because she’s used to being under water.” Obi-Wan filled in the blanks. “So, she uses the humidifier to help keep her skin wet in her room.”

“So, you know how to swim?” The boy asked, very invested in the story. 

Bant smiled with a kind chuckle. “Yes, I actually learned to swim before I learned to walk.” 

“I’ve never been swimming.” Anakin looked down at his hands. “But I heard some of the space pilots talk about having to drop off shipments underwater and it sounded neat.” 

Obi-Wan and Bant exchanged a concerned glance. It was becoming increasingly clear how much they had taken for granted in their lives and how much Anakin had been deprived.

“I can teach you how to swim if you’d like.” Bant asked the young former slave.

Obi-Wan winced as he remembered the first time he had suggested a water shower to Anakin instead of a sonic one and what a nail biting experience that had been for the boy. Being immersed in water was not something Anakin felt safe with yet. He was worried this was all happening far too quickly for the boy to process all the changes, something inside Obi-Wan became suddenly protective of his young charge.

“That would be so wizard!” Anakin’s smile was from ear to ear.

“Are you sure Anakin, it’s a lot more water than a shower.” Obi-Wan tried to coax his apprentice to think things through.

“Oh, yeah…” the group around him could see his mind working, trying to think of all possibilities. “Will you come swimming with us Master Obi-Wan?”

The Jedi Knight was surprised by the urgency in the young voice. “Of course Anakin, I’ll always be there should you need me.” 

Anakin seemed very pleased by this, despite the lack of a training bond Obi-Wan could feel it radiating through the Force. He realized he needed to work harder with Anakin on his shields. 

“Great, so we’ll meet by the lake after Anakin’s last class.” Bant exclaimed.

Obi-Wan glanced at the chrono on the wall. “Speaking of, we better get you to first hour, my young apprentice.” 

Anakin nodded, placing one last piece of bacon in his mouth and grabbing his datapad from Reeft before leaving the Refectory with his Master at his side. 

*******  
Later Obi-Wan exited the Jedi Archives, he had been asked by Jocasta Nu to help update archive information regarding the Sith he encountered on Naboo. The Council had insisted he do so while the memory of the event was still fresh in his mind (like he’d ever forget that moment) and he had avoided the task for over a week, but after being cornered by Ki-Adi-Mundi in the hall he realized he had run out of excuses. 

As he made his way out of the archives he waved to Siri who was sitting at a desk surrounded by datapads, but she didn’t notice him because she was so engrossed in whatever she was studying. He realized that like Siri all the other Jedi in the archives were busy with their own assignments. Obi-Wan briefly thought back to his final assignment that Qui-Gon had given him, he had been tasked to learn the intricacies and business practices of the Trade Federation, his job in the negotiations was to supply his Master with facts whenever needed to make a point. It was something Obi-Wan had done countless times before, it allowed his Master to take on the more creative side of negotiations. His heart sunk realizing he never had a chance to use the knowledge he had spent over two full days pouring over. He never had the opportunity to feel his Master’s appreciation through their bond as he stepped in with knowledge to back the opposition into a corner. There were many things that Obi-Wan struggled with during his apprenticeship, but Diplomacy was never one of them. Even as a teenager Qui-Gon would brag to the Council about Obi-Wan’s ability to negotiate and talk people out of a fight. He suddenly wondered if he and Anakin would have that kind of raport one day. Wondered what sort of team he and the boy from Tatooine would make. 

‘Can’t do much without a training bond,’ a familiar self-loathing voice exclaimed in his head. 

He closed his eyes as the voice in his head began to fill him with insults, reminding him that if only he had been stronger and faster his Master would still be alive. After a moment he felt a gentle hand touch his shoulder. He quickly turned around and came face to face with Siri who’s crystal blue eyes held a look of concern that he wasn’t used to seeing on her usually composed face. 

“Siri, are you okay, what happened?”

She took a step towards him. “You tell me Obi-Wan, your shields are slipping and you're projecting like crazy.” She looked around and took note of a few Knights in the hall looking their way, also concerned. 

“I am?” Obi-Wan asked, confused. 

“You’ve been standing here with your eyes closed for ten minutes.” She said just above a whisper. “You don’t remember?” 

He shook his head. “No, I...um…” 

Without another word she laced her arm around the crook of his elbow and began to lead him to a room next to the archives. As they entered the quiet meditation chamber the glow lamps rose to a dim light, sounds of water were heard coming from fountains lining all four corners of the room. 

Siri helped Obi-Wan sit down on one of the meditation cushions and she then took the one across from him, crossing her legs beneath her. Obi-Wan inhaled and exhaled deeply three times before he was ready to speak. 

“I’m sorry Siri,” 

She rested her elbows on her lap, lacing her fingers together and then placing her chin on top of her hands. “About what?” 

“For whatever that was.” He motioned towards the door. 

“Obi-Wan, what I felt was very, very dark.” She was very careful in her choice of words. 

He sighed, his fingers reaching for the fabric of his tunics just so he had something to grab onto. “I had just been helping Master Nu with updating the information about the Sith, it must’ve insighted some sort of reaction.”

Siri shifted so she was sitting on the edge of the cushion, she reached out and stopped Obi-Wan from fiddling with the fabric of his tunic. “There was fear as well Obi-Wan. The same fear I saw in your eyes when I brought up the training bond.” She held his gaze. “What is going on?” 

He took a shuddering breath and ran a hand over his exhausted eyes. “The Sith somehow was able to block my training bond with Qui-Gon during the fight. He spoke to me and taunted me without ever opening his mouth.” 

Siri’s eyes were wide in shock. “Wait, what are you saying?”

“The Sith was inside my head Siri,” he was suddenly unable to look at her. “He knew my thoughts, my weaknesses…we have a bond somehow.”

‘Try again, little one. Lost your Master, little Jedi…’ A dark voice snarled in his subconscious

He closed his eyes tightly and Siri knelt down in front of him, holding his hands in hers. “Breathe Obi-Wan...easy, just focus on breathing.” 

“He’s still there Siri, somehow.” His eyes flew open and she could see the panic. 

“Okay, ignoring the so many questions I have about how he was able to bond with you in the first place, how can he still have a bond with you now that he’s dead?” She felt a shiver run down her spine.  
Obi-Wan looked down, avoiding her eyes. “I know it sounds crazy, I felt the training bond rip apart when Qui-Gon...when he died, the Sith let me feel every moment of that pain, but somehow I can still feel that monster’s presence sitting there where the bond with my Master used to be. All I feel is hate and anger and I don’t know if that’s him or my own thoughts.” 

“Can’t you release those feelings into the Force?” She asked, her knuckles growing white from holding his hands tightly.

He frantically shook his head. “It’s as if the dark side is blocking my ability to let go of any of my emotions. All I can do is try to mask them, and it’s taking all of my energy to do so.” 

“Obi-Wan, blocking your presence like that constantly would eventually lead to Force Exhaustion. You won’t be able to keep this up for long.” She tried to keep her own voice calm, not wanting to add more guilt to his already full plate.

“I know, I just don’t know what else to do.” He admitted.

“And this is why you won’t form a training bond with Anakin.” She stated, not questioned. 

“I refuse to subject him to this darkness.” The fear in Obi-Wan’s eyes suddenly became determined. 

“I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but maybe you should talk to the Council.” Siri suggested, feeling like she was out of her element.

“I’m already on thin ice for using Sia Tok, if they sense this darkness in me they’ll take Anakin away.” The panic returned to his eyes.

Siri offered a sympathetic look and nodded. “Okay, then let ME in.” 

“What? No, Siri that would require us to…” Obi-Wan argued. 

“Repair our pair bond, I know.” She cut him off. “Look, it's either this or go to the Halls of Healing."

Obi-Wan made a face showing his disgust with going to see the healers.

"I am open to other suggestions if you have any.” Siri shrugged.

He stood up and began to pace the small room. Siri sat up on one of the cushions, waiting for him to speak.

“A pair bond is an attachment and could get me into almost as much trouble with the Council as the lingering dark side in my head.” He turned to look at her. “And it’d drag you into it, I’m not sure I could do that to you.” 

“True, but the bond would require less shields to hide, and it can always be severed,” Siri pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. “We already did once before, what’s one more broken pair bond between friends?” 

He turned to look at her, a brief look of longing passed over his eyes. “Siri, I can’t ask you to do this.” 

“You’re not asking me,” she shrugged. “I’m offering.” 

Obi-Wan stood silent for a long moment, folding his arms across his chest and then bringing one to rest on his chin. “I’ll do what I must for Anakin’s sake.” 

“That’s the spirit!” Siri teased and he offered a hesitant chuckle. 

A few moments later the two friends sat on one of the large meditation cushions,facing each other, their knees touching. Obi-Wan’s hands placed on his lap with his palms facing up. Siri slowly placed her hands on her own thighs and moved to lay her palms over Obi-Wan’s. 

“For the record, I’m doing this for your sake.” She said as their palms touched and both of them sank into a deep meditative trance. 

After what felt like hours both Jedi returned from their shared meditation, exhausted mentally, emotionally and within the Force. The lingering darkness left from the Sith apprentice was removed with the care of a surgeon from the shredded remains of Obi-Wan’s old training bond. Siri and Obi-Wan collectively were not able to sever the dark bond from Obi-Wan’s mind completely, but were able to contain it and lock it away. Both knew that while the two of them were a formidable team, it would require a Mind Healer or maybe Master Yoda to eradicate the dark bond completely. It was a temporary fix, but for the first time since the Naboo generator Obi-Wan could sense his own emotions and cast them into the Force. 

Siri fell onto her back on the meditation cushion, pinching the bridge of her nose. Her head swam with overwhelming emotions that weren’t hers through the newly repaired pair bond. She outwardly groaned in response. 

“Shields Kenobi, for the love of the Force…” 

Obi-Wan was sitting on the edge of the cushion, his head in his hands. He looked at her over his shoulder as she spoke. “Sorry Siri, one moment.” 

Siri felt a sudden relief as his whirlwind of emotions was shielded from their open bond. She then sent him waves of comfort as best as she could given her Force exhaustion. It was then that she took a moment to feel the genuine grief and insecurities coming from him before he reinforced his shields and her heart broke for her friend. She was impressed he was even able to function given what he was feeling, there was a strength to him that she knew many people in the order didn’t give him enough credit for. 

She sat up and reached out with trembling fingers. The bond between them dredged up many of her own emotions, ones she had locked away for nearly a decade. She desperately wanted to hold him, but she knew that was not a path either of them dared to tread. She forced herself to place her hand on his shoulder instead.

“I am so sorry for...everything.” Her voice was small. “I’m here if you need anything.” 

He reached up and gently took her hand in his and placed a small kiss to her palm. “I believe you already went above and beyond Siri. And for that I’m eternally grateful.” 

He rose to his shakey feet and stumbled towards the door. “I have to go pick up Anakin.” 

“Of course,”

“We’re all meeting at the lake if you wanted to join us for a swim.” He suggested, his voice hopeful. “Some levity would probably do both of us some good after all of this.” 

Siri made a very unhappy face “I’d love that, but I have a meeting with the Council to go over our failed mission to Kessel”

“That bad huh?”

“Let’s just say anything that could’ve gone wrong with that mission did go wrong.” She said sadly. “I doubt it’ll be a quick meeting, but if I can I’ll meet up with you guys later.” 

Obi-Wan offered a genuine smile and exited the meditation chamber. Siri stared at the door for a moment after he left and suddenly wondered how she was going to handle her upcoming mission with a pair bond in place. She didn’t want to put Obi-Wan through any more pain, but deep down she knew that was unavoidable and she would have to sever the bond in the process. Siri realized it would add an extra layer of authenticity to her cover if someone as close to her as Obi-Wan truly believed she was gone. She took a deep breath and decided to meditate to try and release her anxieties. When that didn’t work she headed for the training salle to work off her excess energy.

*********  
“Are there really a thousand fountains?” Anakin asked, his eyes wide as he took in the beauty of the garden all around him.

Obi-Wan settled himself down on the grass next to one of the larger pools and thought for a moment before answering. “You know my young Padawan, I am not sure. I’ve never actually counted them.”

“I’ve tried counting them, but they all start blending together and you forget which ones you’ve already counted.” Garen Muln smiled as he approached the pair. “I think that’s part of the illusion, maybe there are only a handful of real fountains and a bunch of strategically placed mirrors.” 

“Or maybe it’s just a name, and not meant to be taken literally.” Obi-Wan mused while he and Garen performed their special handshake. 

“Meh, you’re no fun. I prefer the conspiracy.” Garen laughed and then turned his attention to the boy. “Hey, you must be Anakin.” 

Anakin nodded enthusiastically, reaching out to shake the stranger’s hand. “Anakin Skywalker, Jedi Apprentice.” He beamed with a sense of pride.

Garen and Obi-Wan exchanged amused glances. Garen knelt down to be on Anakin’s eye level as he returned the handshake. “I’m Garen Muln, also a Jedi Apprentice.” 

“And Jedi Pilot.” Obi-Wan added watching Anakin’s face light up. 

“There are Jedi Pilots?” Anakin couldn’t contain his excitement which caused the two older Jedi to laugh. 

Garen nodded. “Yeah, my Master is a member of the Starfighter Corps, I’m training to become a member as well one day.”

“I’m a pilot too,” Anakin said with absolute assurance.

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yes, in fact it was Anakin’s piloting skills that turned the tide against the Trade Federation.” Obi-Wan stated, letting Anakin see his admiration. 

“Wow, that’s most impressive kid.” Garen said, his tone suggested he was honestly impressed.

The young boy’s smile was from ear to ear. “Yeah, and I flew a podracer. Master Qui-Gon bet on me to win the race. That’s how I was freed and he brought me back to become a Jedi.” 

Garen suddenly looked towards Obi-Wan at the mention of his former master, the newly knighted Jedi offered a warm smile of encouragement to Anakin. 

“Qui-Gon knew you had Jedi reflexes. He was very proud of you Ani.” Obi-Wan said, his voice calm, but his eyes were sad. 

Garen decided to change the subject. “You know I’m working on rebuilding the engine for a Delta-6, would you like to come help me out one of these days?”

“Can I Master Obi-Wan?” Anakin’s young voice pleaded.

“Yeah, can he Master Obi-Wan?” Garen’s tone matched Anakin’s.

Obi-Wan smiled at the child’s infectious enthusiasm. “Of course Anakin, as long as you’re caught up with your studies.

As Garen and Anakin continued to talk excitedly about starships Obi-Wan closed his eyes and felt the warm embrace of the Force flow through the room. He had always felt a closer connection to it while in the Room of a Thousand Fountains, oftentimes realizing he was able to use it’s powerful connection to the Living Force to help him when his own connection was lacking. He hadn’t stepped foot in the garden since returning from Naboo, every corner of the room reminded him of Qui-Gon, the hours they had spent meditating beneath one of the Uneti trees, or how his master would read on the bench beside a bush of jasmine flowers (his favorite scent). He remembered large hands tugging gently on his Padawan braid as they walked the trails around the garden in a teasing chide because Obi-Wan had made some cheeky remark (as he was so keen to do). Obi-Wan instinctively reached up to brush the hair behind his right ear, the sensation feeling like a phantom limb with the missing bit of plaited hair. He wondered if he’d ever get used to the fact that the long braid no longer existed.

‘Keep your concentration here and now Padawan.’ The voice of his Master echoed through his mind.

He closed his eyes tightly. ‘Yes Master,’ 

As the voice faded into memory Obi-Wan opened his eyes and was greeted with a heart warming sight. Bant, Reeft and Quinlan had joined them at the lake and were all working their way into the water. Bant had her webbed hands outstretched for Anakin who while unsure of submerging himself in water showed no signs of actual fear. Not the first time in their short apprenticeship Obi-Wan found himself impressed by the boy’s bravery, though he had to admit it often made Anakin rush into situations without thinking. Something Obi-Wan realized he’d need to work on with the young boy.

As if Anakin was able to read his mind he turned back to look at his new Master still sitting on the shore. “Aren’t you coming Master Obi-Wan?” 

“I’m right behind you, my young apprentice.” 

He gracefully rose to his feet, but as he was about to wade into the water he was met by a series of splashes caused by Quinlan, Garen and Reeft. The young Jedi knight found himself dripping wet glaring daggers at his three friends accompanied by the amused laughter from his nine year old Padawan. 

And it was the happiest he’d been in over two weeks.

******

The sun was setting on the horizon and it cast beautiful orange and purple hues across the High Council Chamber. The twelve members of the Council were silent, but their eyes were fixed on her. Siri Tachi knew they were speaking within their Council bond which meant they were discussing something they didn’t want her to hear. This frustrated her immensely since she knew in order to have a successful mission she needed all the information available to her.

Her eyes scanned the faces of the Council members, she knew each of them well (some more than others) because of her Master. To her left she could feel her Master’s presence, she knew how Adi felt about this mission and she couldn’t bring herself to look in that direction for fear of losing her own nerve. 

“Padawan...I’m sorry, Knight Tachi,” Eeth Koth broke the silence. “Do you feel you have had adequate time to become familiar with the mission?”

“Yes Master,” her voice did not waver. 

“And you are still willing to accept this mission?” Plo Koon asked, his voice full of concern.

“I am.” 

“You understand that this mission is off the record from the Senate and therefore there can be no other Jedi interference should you need assistance?” Mace Windu sat forward, leaning his elbows on his knees. 

“I understand Master.” Siri met his gaze, she would not show any hints of fear or uncertainty. 

“You understand that Krayn has standing orders to kill Jedi on sight?” Even Piell’s voice was next.

“It is a good thing that I will not be a Jedi.” Siri calmly stated. 

“A joke this is not.” Yaddle chided.

“Apologies Master.” 

“Siri,” Adi’s voice was calm and collected to anyone who didn’t know her, but Siri could sense the incredible sadness in her voice. “Your life will be in great danger every single moment of this mission.”  
Her eyes blinked for the first time since this questioning started and now they blinked rapidly to stop herself from tearing up when she heard the heartbreak in her Master’s voice. “I am aware Master, I will be cautious.” 

“How feel you?” Yoda finally spoke, his question taking Siri by surprise.

“Ready Master.” She quickly answered.

“See through you we can.” The Grandmaster of the Order stated with sleepy eyes.

Siri took a deep breath and accessed her feelings through the Force. “I feel honored that you would trust such an important mission to me, I feel overwhelmed by the enormity of what is being asked of me...and I am afraid Master.” 

“Afraid of the dangers of this mission young Tachi?” Ki-Adi-Mundi asked.

“No Master,” she answered and swallowed. “Afraid of what I’ll be forced to become in order to be successful in this mission.” 

“Your commitment to the Code, to the Jedi tested it will be.” Yoda nodded in understanding. “Tempted by the dark side you will be.” 

Siri could see Adi’s body language stiffen, she figured something was said through the Council bond. 

“Sacrificed much to honor the Code you already have,” Yoda seemed to look right through her. “Worried about your commitment I am not, loyal your heart will always be.” 

Siri bowed her head in humility at Yoda’s words, though wondering if he could somehow sense her recently reformed pair bond. 

“This mission is to gather intel only,” Adi Gallia stated, her words were meant for Siri, but her voice challenged anyone on the Council to defy her. “You are to infiltrate Krayn’s organization, it will take time to earn his trust.” Her face held firm, but her eyes softened. “It could take years Siri to work your way up. You will have no contact with us other than coded messages.” She sighed. “Do you understand?”  
Siri had of course been told all of this already, but she knew her Master had insisted she reflect and meditate on her choice to volunteer for this mission before she gave her final answer to the Council. 

“I understand Master.” She turned to face Adi. “I will use your training and be mindful. I will not fail you.” 

Adi nodded and Siri could feel reluctant acceptance followed by encouragement through their training bond. Siri then turned back to face Yoda and Mace Windu. 

“You will leave tonight.” Mace said quietly.

“Tonight?” Both Siri and Adi exclaimed in unison. 

“Are you not prepared for your mission Knight Tachi?” Plo Koon asked.

In truth Siri wasn’t ready, but not for the reasons the Council assumed. There was little chance she would survive this mission, she didn’t want to leave without seeing her friends one more time. She chided herself because she knew that was a selfish and un-Jedi like way to be thinking, especially since Krayn was the cause of so much suffering. She also knew the horrible truth that her sneaking out during the night could blow her cover. 

“There must be witnesses.” She calmly stated. 

“Witnesses, Siri?” Eeth Koth asked, confused.

“I have a reputation Masters for being a fananitcal strict follower of the Code,” She admitted. “My dedication to the Jedi won’t come into question unless my fall is witnessed.” 

“Siri, no…” Adi began to disagree.

The young knight lifted her hand to stop her Master from continuing. “They must see that Adi renounced me, publicly.” She looked at Adi, her eyes full of determination yet sorrow. “I’m sorry Master, it’s the only way.” 

“This will make your return more difficult for you Siri, more difficult than it needs to be.” Depa Billaba’s voice was laced with concern. “Your reputation could needlessly suffer.”

Siri nodded. “I know, but we have no other choice. If somehow my identity is discovered by Krayn it will be easier to explain that I am a fallen Jedi. It will also be public record in the off chance I am recognized by someone from the Senate.” She looked back at Yoda. “It is the only way to keep this mission secret.” 

“Wise beyond your years, Knight Tachi you are.” Yoda agreed. 

“I assume you have a suggestion then, when and where this should take place?” Mace Windu asked, leaning back in his chair. 

“Outside the archives, as the last hour classes end.” She looked at Adi again. “Tomorrow.” 

“What say you Master Gallia?” Plo Koon asked, gently. 

Siri knew that he was only asking out of respect for his friend and fellow Council member, since technically Siri was no longer Adi’s Padawan; she had no authority to stop the mission from happening. 

“I trust Siri,” she looked into her former apprentice’s eyes. “I always have.” 

“It is settled then,” Mace spoke, hoping to cut the tension. “Tomorrow you will publicly renounce Siri as you Padawan, and Siri will publicly leave the Jedi Order.”

In that moment Siri Tachi began a mission that she knew should she survive would change her life forever.

**********  
TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and your continued comments!! I made some references in this chapter from Meysun’s beautiful story - Obi’s bond with Maul was from their original story (go read it if you haven’t already): https://archiveofourown.org/works/23579242/chapters/56573209
> 
> Also, I spent more time with Obi-Wan’s thoughts in this chapter than I originally intended to...hopefully it doesn’t feel too out of place in this story since most of the rest of it from his friend’s perspective.
> 
> Again, this originally wasn't supposed to be a story about Siri's undercover mission, but it will come into play how it effects Obi-Wan in the next few chapters.


	5. Chapter 5 - Anakin Makes Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anakin has a bit of a meltdown.  
> Bant helps Obi-Wan move into his room.  
> Siri teaches Anakin how to prepare Obi's favorite tea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in one week?!! This is ahead of schedule, but since tomorrow is May the 4th I wanted to give you all a present!! May the 4th be with you!
> 
> // // = speaking through a bond (mostly because I can't figure out how to do italics in this format)

Later that evening the hydraulic doors swooshed open and a dripping wet boy ran through the common room in a blur, leaving a trail of water behind him. Without looking back he rushed into the smaller of the two bedrooms and slammed the door. 

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan was right behind him, a little less drenched than his apprentice. 

“Leave me alone!” Anakin’s young voice was raspy, it was clear he was out of breath from running and probably also from crying. “I don’t want to talk about it Obi-Wan.” 

The young Jedi Master placed his hand on the door knob and did his best to center himself. He realized in that moment just how exhausted he was, between Anakin’s night terrors and his own grief he hadn’t had a full night’s sleep in over two weeks. 

“Padawan, you promised you would talk to me,” He softly called through the door. “Even if you only want to scream obscenities at me.” 

“What?”

“Bad words Anakin,” Obi-Wan amended, remembering he needed to adjust his vocabulary for the young boy. “You can scream all the bad words at me you want as long as you talk to me.”

There was only silence on the other side of the door for a moment followed by a soft, desperate voice. “I want mom.”

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and leaned his head on the cool durasteel door. His heart broke because he knew he’d never be able to give Anakin the things his mother could. He realized this would be another example of him lacking in experience and talent, wounds of self doubt that had not yet been attended to bled freely in his mind. 

//Stop it.// A familiar voice was in his head, but it startled him as he had almost forgotten about the pair bond. //the boy asking for his mother isn’t a failing on your part, just give him some space.//  
He looked up when he felt the Force presence, he moved into the small kitchenette where Siri Tachi was washing root vegetables in his sink. 

“Siri, what are you doing here?” He asked, surprised to see her.

She motioned to the vegetables, “cooking dinner.” 

“How did you even get in, the door lock code…”

“Bant gave it to me when she wasn’t available to water Qui-Gon’s plants when you guys were on Pijal.” Siri smiled. “She asked me to fill in. I also just took care of them, it looked like they hadn’t been watered in a while.”

Obi-Wan looked at the collection of potted plants in the corner of the room next to a worn leather armchair with a colorful knitted blanket hanging off the back. He realized he had been subconsciously avoiding Qui-Gon’s favorite reading nook, he suddenly felt immense sadness and guilt over his neglect of the precious plants. Some his master had raised from seedlings brought back from various missions. Obi-Wan used to tease that Qui-Gon collected them like he collected ‘pathetic life forms’. He couldn’t believe he had forgotten about them. 

//You’ve been busy, no real harm done, they’ll grow back.// Siri said through their bond, walking up behind him and placing a hand on his shoulder. 

//I really need to get better about blocking this bond.// He sighed and then turned around to face her. //You tease me less through the bond, it’s a little unsettling.//

It was at that moment that Siri realized that he was wearing nothing but a towel around his waist (and swimming attire beneath that she assumed). Her eyes traveled over his toned torso and muscular arms that still had a sheen on them from the water. She inwardly cursed the pair bond because she knew it was adding an extra layer to her already complicated feelings for him. He took a step towards her, his chest nearly touching hers. They looked into each other’s eyes, Siri could see the pain etched into the depth of his blue/grey eyes. Obi-Wan tilted his head as he noticed the look in her own eyes.   
“Something’s happened, what’s wrong?” He asked, the concern in his voice evident. 

She inwardly cursed herself for not shielding her own emotions from him better. “Nothing, it’s just the Council meeting was intense.” She decided to give him a portion of the truth, knowing he’d see right through her if she lied. 

//Siri...tell me.//

She shook her head and forced a smile. “It’s nothing, there was just some tension between me and my Master over our last mission. It’ll blow over.”

Obi-Wan reached out and gently brushed a piece of hair that had fallen over her eyes, she felt herself shiver at his touch. 

‘Kriff, this is not good.’ she thought to herself.

//Everyone is treating me like I’m fragile,// She heard him say over the bond. //Promise you won’t keep things from me because you’re afraid I might break.//

She looked down at the floor and then back up and met his gaze. //I promise that will never be a reason I keep things from you.// 

His eyes narrowed in suspicion, he could tell she wasn’t telling him something, luckily for Sir’s sake the door swooshed open and Bant came in. She had apparently taken the time to dress after swimming, but was carrying a small towel, a comlink and a datapad. 

“I grabbed these for you,” she handed the items to Obi-Wan. “How is he?” 

Obi-Wan tossed the towel into the laundry basket located in the corner of the living room which Bant hadn’t noticed was there. And then he set the comlink and the datapad on the coffee table. He placed his hands on his hips and motioned towards Anakin’s closed door with his head. 

“He won’t talk to me.” His voice was more frustrated than he intended. 

Siri looked between Obi-Wan and Bant. “What happened?”

“He wanted to learn how to swim underwater,” Bant began to explain. “He learned everything else so quickly I didn’t think it would be a big deal.”

Obi-Wan raked his hands over his face. “He’s never been submerged before, he’s never even been in water before.” 

“I know Obi, I’m sorry.” 

He took a deep breath and released his anxiety into the Force. “I know Bant, it’s not your fault. I’m his Master, I should’ve known his limits.” 

“Again, what happened?” Siri asked, folding her arms across her chest. 

“He tried to take a breath under the water.” Bant sadly stated. “When he couldn’t breath he panicked and couldn’t find his way back up to the surface.” 

“His first outing and he almost died.” Obi-Wan exclaimed, the defeat evident in his voice. “Why Qui-Gon even remotely thought I could do this…”

“Obi-Wan, he was fine.” Bant softly said, placing a webbed hand on his shoulder. “Kids are resilient, he’ll be okay.”

“Besides, show me one Master who hasn’t almost killed their Padawan at one time or another.” Siri chimed in and received a death glare from Obi-Wan.

“Not helpful.” He growled. 

The three Jedi then heard a shuffle and as they turned to look towards the sound they found a large piece of flimsiplast that had been slid under the door. Siri walked over and picked it up and showed it to the other two with a raised eyebrow. The flimsiplast said two words:

TOO LOUD

“I may officially love this kid.” Siri said with a smirk. “Why didn’t we think of doing this when we were mad at our Masters?” 

“Okay, that’s it…” Obi-Wan grumbled and headed towards the door, Siri and Bant moved to block his path. 

“Obi, why don’t you go and change.” Bant suggested. “Siri will go talk to him.”

“Me, why me?”

“Because you weren’t at the lake.” The Mon Calamari softly explained, trying to subdue Kenobi in the process. “Maybe you can coax him out of his room.”

Siri tossed the note from Anakin onto the coffee table. “Okay, I’ll dig down and find my maternal instincts.” 

“Do you even have those?” Obi-Wan teased, unable to help himself.

She turned and looked at him. “Oh, I’m sorry, if you want Bant and I can just leave you to take care of this on your own.” 

//Please stay.//

Her lips curved upwards as she heard him plead through their bond and then turned towards Anakin’s room. She gently knocked on the door and after a moment of silence used the Force to open it and walked on in. Obi-Wan pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration at her tactics, he had been trying to work on boundaries with Anakin.

Siri closed the bedroom door behind her and glanced around the room. She found Anakin sitting on the floor next to the far side of his bed, tinkering with what looked like a cleaning droid. 

“Master Obi-Wan never comes in without knocking.” He didn’t look at her, but she could sense his anger easily through the Force. 

“Well, I’m not Master Obi-Wan and technically I did knock.” She answered calmly. Siri then waited for a moment for him to respond, when he didn’t she decided to break the silence. “You wanna talk about it?”

Anakin shook his head and sniffed, Siri realized he had been crying. She decided not to point it out because she remembered being a Jedi youngling with a chip on her shoulder not wanting anyone to see her cry. She sat down on his bed with one leg tucked beneath the other and noticed a small star-shaped tooka doll.

“Who’s this?” She asked as she picked up the doll. 

Anakin looked back at her from over his shoulder. “Spikes.”

“Nice to meet you Spikes, my name is Siri.” She turned the doll to face her and then did a goofy voice. “Oh, glad to meet you Siri, wow I’m not used to Jedi being so beautiful.” She bounced the doll around in the air as if it were talking. She then changed back to her own voice. “Oh Spikes, that’s so nice of you to say.” She then changed back to the goofy voice. “It’s true, do you have a boyfriend?” She pointed a finger towards the doll. “I’m sorry Spikes, but I’m spoken for.”

“Jedi don’t have boyfriends and girlfriends,” Anakin sniffed and turned around and sat up on his knees so he was leaning his arms on the bed. “And that’s not how Spikes talks.” 

Siri looked at Spikes and then Anakin. “You’re right Anakin, Jedi don’t have boyfriends and girlfriends.” She handed him the doll. “So, how does Spikes talk?”

“No, it’s dumb.” 

She tilted her head. “I had an imaginary friend when I was your age.” She confessed. “He was a black and white Loth-Cat named Moo-shie and only I could see him.”

“Really?”

“Really.” She brought her knees up to her chest so she could wrap her arms around them. “See Anakin I didn’t have very many friends when I was younger. I was always too competitive and tried to be the best in every class, but that meant that sometimes I wasn’t very nice.” She looked at him carefully. “And that also meant sometimes I would get mad when I wasn’t good at something or if something didn’t come easy to me.”

Anakin was picking fuzz off of Spikes, not looking at her. “I don’t like it when things are hard.” 

“You want to know a secret?” She leaned towards him. “Neither do I.” 

“But, you’re a Jedi, how do you stop from getting mad when things are hard?” He looked up at her and she could see his eyes were puffy from crying. 

“Well, it takes practice.” She admitted. “I am sure you’ve started learning how to release your feelings into the Force?” She asked and Anakin nodded. “Well, that will get easier as you get older, but when I was your age I hated meditation.” 

“Me too, but Master Obi-Wan loves it.” Anakin grumbled. 

Siri chuckled. “Well, he maybe does now, but your Master wasn’t always like that. I bet if you asked he could tell you ways he used to stop feeling mad when he was a kid besides meditation.” 

“I guess,”

“Why won’t you talk to him Anakin?” She said in an encouraging voice. 

“I don’t want to make him sad.” Anakin admitted. “I don’t want him to give me away.” 

Her eyebrows furrowed. “Why would you think he’d give you away?”

“That’s what my other Masters would do if they didn’t like me.” He shrugged. 

Siri realized he wasn’t talking about Jedi Masters. Her heart clenched realizing this sweet, young boy grew up in slave culture and she couldn’t imagine the horrors he had endured. Any doubts she had about her upcoming mission suddenly vanished and she was resolved to help end slavery in any capacity she could. 

“Anakin, I know for a fact that Obi-Wan would never give you away.” She said softly, reaching out to run a hand through his wet hair. “In fact he needs you Anakin. He will never admit this because your Master is very, very VERY stubborn - don’t tell him I said that. But, he needs you, especially right now.” 

“But, he’s a Jedi. Jedi don’t need anyone.” 

“If the Jedi didn’t need each other then why would we all live together in this temple? It’s the collective strength of the Jedi that brings about the most good.” Siri shook her head. “And yes, Obi-Wan is a Jedi. And a very good Jedi. But, you know how you’re just now learning how to be a Jedi apprentice?” Anakin nodded. “Well, he’s just now learning how to be a Jedi Master, so he might need some help from you.” 

“How can I help?” 

“You can start by talking to him when you’re feeling angry or afraid or sad. It helps him to be able to help you work through those feelings.” She placed a hand on his shoulder. “Do you think you can do that for him?” 

“Okay, I’ll try.” 

Siri smiled. “Good. Now, how about you get dressed and then come give me a hand and we’ll make your Master a nice home cooked dinner? Because, I’m sorry to say this Obi-Wan is a great Jedi, but a terrible cook.” 

Anakin nodded and Siri rose up from the bed, she turned to look at him as he placed Spikes back onto the pillow. 

“Spikes only talks to me through our minds.” He said as his cheeks went red, worried she would mock him. 

“Oh, so you have a Force bond with Spikes.” Siri’s voice was kind but not patronizing. “That’s really awesome Anakin, you can only have Force bonds with really important people in your life.” 

His eyes went wide. “Really?”

She nodded. “Yeah, I’m sure you and Obi-Wan will have one soon. It’s called a training bond, all Masters and Padawans have it.” 

“Did Obi-Wan have one with Master Qui-Gon?”

“Yes, he did.” Siri said, without thinking. “It was a very strong one.”

“What happened to it when Master Qui-Gon...you know?” Anakin curiously yet sadly asked. 

Siri felt her face grow pale at the question. “Oh, um...well Anakin Force bonds can be removed. Most Masters and Padawans remove theirs once the Padawan is knighted. But, it’s a very delicate process to remove one. When someone with a bond becomes one with the Force it can tear the bond and that can be very painful.” 

“Is that why Master Obi-Wan is sad?” He asked. 

She wished that she hadn’t brought up this topic. She knelt in front of Anakin so she was eye level. “That’s one of the reasons, yes. You see the broken bond reminds him of Master Qui-Gon.” 

“When we have a bond I’m never going to remove it. Not even when I’m a Master.” Anakin proclaimed. “Cause I don’t ever want to make Obi-Wan sad.”

She smiled. “That is a very admirable thing Anakin. See, I told you your Master needs you.” 

Anakin then tackled her and wrapped his arms around her neck in a messy hug. She could feel the Force surrounding them, it was almost nauseating with it’s sheer power. She returned the embrace, realizing that this child might just be the best and worst thing to ever happen to her friend.

“Okay, are you ready to come out now?” She asked after a moment, releasing herself from Anakin’s hug. 

“I think so.” 

“Good, cause I’m getting hungry.” She rose to her feet. 

********

Obi-Wan came out of the Freshner wearing his usual cream colored tunic and pants, he didn’t bother putting on his belt or his boots since he knew he was in for the evening. He glanced up at Anakin’s door which was still closed and then turned his attention to Bant who was looking around the common room with a concerned look on her face. 

“Are they still at it?” He motioned towards Anakin’s door. 

Bant nodded. “I haven’t heard any raised voices so that’s a good sign.” 

Obi-Wan chuckled and moved towards the kitchenette. “Do you want any tea?” He asked and Bant shook her head. 

Bant glanced down again at the pillows and blankets that were folded at the foot of the couch, she also saw a box with his belongings sitting in a corner of the room. She turned and looked at her oldest and dearest friend, noticing the slump in his shoulders and she had already noted the dark circles under his eyes. 

“Obi-Wan, why are you sleeping on the couch?” She decided to be blunt with him.

He didn’t turn to look at her as he began to fill the teapot with water. “So I can be closer to Anakin when he has his night terrors.” 

Bant folded her arms across her chest. “Okay, then why do you have your laundry and all of your personal effects out here?” Her silver eyes were full of concern. “Why aren’t they in your room?”

“Because it isn’t my room.” He placed the teapot down and leaned on the counter, still unable to look at her.

“Obi…”

“No, Bant I wasn’t supposed to be here.” He finally turned and looked at her. “Qui-Gon was going to renounce me and train Anakin. I was supposed to be either with a new Master or off to the Corps, but I wasn’t supposed to be...here.” He took a shuddering breath. “It was never supposed to be my room, but he left me.” 

Bant had begun training as a healer, she used the Force to create a calm over the room. She then saw Obi-Wan’s tense body language relax slightly. She walked up to him and enveloped him in a hug. Obi-Wan wrapped his arms around her, taking comfort in the familiarity of his best friend’s presence. 

“But you ARE here Obi, and it’s time to move into YOUR room.” Her voice was barely audible. 

“I know, I just can’t bring myself to do it.” He admitted. 

She released him from the hug and looked at him with a kind smile that proved she would make an amazing healer. “That’s why you have friends.” 

Obi-Wan sadly chuckled. “Some Jedi Knight I’m turning out to be, I can’t get my Padawan to speak to me and I also can’t let go of my Master.” 

Bant led him towards the Master bedroom. “When Master Tahl passed I couldn’t get out of bed for a week.” 

“That’s right Bant, I’m sorry here I keep going on and on about Qui-Gon and you’ve lost a Master yourself.” Obi-Wan exclaimed, guilt in his voice.

“First off, this is probably the longest conversation you’ve had about Qui-Gon with me since his passing so you haven’t been going on and on.” She wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “Secondly, I’ve had nine years to process her death, Obi-Wan, and I was only her Padawan for a short time. I only brought it up to say that you’re doing better than you think you are and to tell you not to be so hard on yourself.” 

Obi-Wan did his best to release his anxiety over going into Qui-Gon’s old room into the Force and then opened the door. The smell was a mixture of dust with a hint of spices that had been left over from the incense Qui-Gon loved to burn. His knees trembled as he walked through the door and into the small room, he took note of the various items spread throughout the space until his eyes landed on the nightstand where two holopics were sitting in simple carved frames. Obi-Wan picked up the first frame and in it saw a lanky, awkward sixteen year old version of himself next to his Master who had Obi-Wan in a hug that looked more like a headlock.

It had been Qui-Gon’s birthday and he insisted on going to the Coruscanti zoo because he loved the animals. And Obi-Wan being a moody teenager really didn’t want to go and complained under his breath the entire ride to the zoo. Somehow Qui-Gon had managed to make it an unforgettable day, setting up a special encounter where they got to ride a Blurrg; it ended up being a much needed bonding experience between the pair during a tumultuous time in their relationship. 

Obi-Wan rated that day as one of the top ten best in his life, and with the prominent placement of the picture apparently so had Qui-Gon. He then picked up the next frame and wasn’t surprised to see a beautiful portrait of Tahl.

“Do you think they’ve found each other?” Bant asked, looking at the picture over his shoulder.

The Jedi training in Obi-Wan wanted to remind Bant that one does not keep their conscious self within the Cosmic Force, but he couldn’t bring himself to utter those words so instead he just said.   
“Knowing them, yes, without a doubt.” He couldn’t help the sad smile. Obi-Wan handed Bant the picture. “Here, he’d want you to have this.” 

“Thank you Obi.” She said, clutching the frame to her chest. 

Obi-Wan took a deep breath and looked around the room. Jedi were typically discouraged from having possessions, but Qui-Gon being the ever maverick Jedi was a bit of a pack rat. Obi-Wan shook his head. 

“I don’t even know where to begin.” He admitted. 

Bant put a hand on his shoulder. “We don’t have to do all of this tonight, how about we start with the closet?”

He reluctantly nodded, logically knowing there was no reason to be saving any of Qui-Gon’s clothes, especially when another Jedi could use them. He slowly began to bring out of the closet various tunics, tabards, Obis, and trousers and placed them on the bed where Bant began to fold them neatly. He then picked up the dark brown cloak, immediately he could smell the musky scent of Qui-Gon infused in the fabric, and in that moment he was transported back to being thirteen years old, clutching his Master’s robe while sick and being comforted by strong arms. This robe felt like home to Obi-Wan and despite his desire to always adhere to the code he couldn’t bring himself to part with it. 

“I’m going to keep this one,” he said as he cleared his throat. “Maybe Anakin will grow into it one day.” 

Bant nodded with a smile and picked up the other articles of clothing. “I should get going, I have the night shift tonight in the Halls. I’ll take these down to have them redistribute.” 

“Thank you Bant.” He sat on the edge of the bed. 

She stood over him and very kindly yet sternly spoke in her best healer tone. “You need to focus on some self care Obi-Wan. The last thing that boy in there needs is to worry about his Master collapsing due to lack of eating or sleeping.”

“I will endeavor to try.” He replied.

“Do or do not…”

“I get it. Your orders are understood, doctor.” His tired eyes managed a wink. 

“I’m serious, I will not hesitate to sick Master Che on you.” The Mon Calamari teased as only a best friend could. 

He chuckled and nodded. “Wouldn’t want that. You have my word my friend.”

“Let me know if you need anything else.” She said over her shoulder as she headed for the door. 

“I will.” 

She stopped and looked at him suspiciously. “Mmm-hmm, I’ll be by to check on you tomorrow.” 

He rose to his feet and followed her into the common room. “I don’t have a say in this do I?”

“Nope.” She called over her shoulder as she exited his quarters. “Have a good night Obi-Wan.”

“Good night my friend.” He softly said with a sigh. He loved his friend dearly and deep down he was thankful for her meddling. He refused to let her know that however, for fear of it becoming a habit of hers.

As he turned back into the apartment he sensed (and heard) commotion in his kitchen, he silently made his way towards the noise and leaned against the wall that separated the dining area from the kitchen, watching the scene unfold through the doorway. Siri was in the process of chopping the root vegetables while Anakin was carefully stirring something that was cooking in a pan on the small stove.

“Watch the Temperature Anakin,” Siri stated and Anakin turned the knob on the stove. “The important thing about cooking is not to turn the heat too high for fear of burning the food. It requires patience, this is probably the one area where your Master has none.” 

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. ‘You burn roasted Nuna legs ONE time and they never let you live it down.’ 

The teapot screeched, signalling the water was ready. Siri picked up the sliced veggies and dropped them into a boiling pot then motioned for Anakin to move away from the stove. 

“You see that white mug with the chip on the rim, grab that please.” She instructed as Anakin ran to the dishrack to grab the well loved oversized cup. “That’s Obi-Wan’s favorite mug, so when you make him tea be sure to always use this one.” She then amended. “Unless you have company in which case you use these mugs up here.” She pointed to a set of matching small light blue tea cups hanging above the counter on hooks. 

Obi-Wan crossed his arms and placed one up to his chin as he continued to observe Siri instruct his Padawan on the intricacies of making tea, or more to the point of making him tea. He remembered how he had taken it upon himself to always wake up before Qui-Gon to make him a mug of his favorite tea every morning, somehow he doubted his rambunctious Padawan would adopt that routine, but he appreciated Siri’s efforts. 

“So, that canister there has Sapphire tea,” Siri pointed to one of the glass jars full of tea leaves. “That is Obi-Wan’s favorite tea, don’t ask me why because it’s way too bitter for most normal human beings.” 

‘Just human beings who don’t have any taste buds.’ Obi-Wan silently huffed, it was an argument he’d had way too many times with people. 

Anakin began to pack the tea leaf infuser. “Mom used to have me make her tea sometimes, mostly when I gave her a headache.”

“I’m sure Obi-Wan will have you continue that tradition.” Siri smiled and glanced at his work. “Don’t be afraid to fill it up all the way, he likes it strong.” 

Anakin nodded and continued to pack the infuser. Siri then poured the boiling water into the mug. Anakin then reached for the sugar in a small jar next to the tea canisters, but Siri stopped him. 

“No sugar,” she commented. “Just a spoonful of Alderaanian honey and a splash of Nerf milk. But, you want to let it sit for a moment to allow the flavors to open up.” 

Obi-Wan smiled, surprised Siri remembered how he took his tea. Of course if the cards were reversed he knew exactly how she liked her own tea - a ginger lemon blend from Kashyyyk with two spoonfuls of sugar. A blend of bitter and sweet, much like Siri’s personality. 

“Does he drink tea every day?” Anakin asked.

“I’m not going to lie to you Anakin, your Master has a bit of a tea addiction.” Siri smirked, returning to the stove to stir the meat in the pan. “Sapphire is his favorite, but he’ll pretty much drink anything in a pinch.” 

Anakin turned his attention to the various tea canisters. “So, I could give him any of these?”

“Well,” Siri picked the smallest of the canisters up. “This one is really only reserved for Master Yoda when he visits.” She made a face of disgust as she suddenly could taste the flavor in her mouth. “It honestly takes like bog water, only he likes it.” 

“Gross,” 

“Yeah, dinner invitations to Yoda’s apartment are not my favorite.” She put the canister down and then noticed one that was half full of dried purple tea leaves. “This one,” she pointed to it. “This is jasmine tea, it was Master Qui-Gon’s favorite.” 

Anakin picked up the canister and smelled the sweet aroma of the tea. “That smells really good.” 

Siri nodded. “Yes, it’s a very good tea.” She stirred the contents of the pots again. “You’ll want to give him this if Obi-Wan is sick or injured.” 

Obi-Wan closed his eyes, memories of Qui-Gon always bringing a mug of the jasmine tea to his bedside whenever his health wasn’t at it’s best made his heart constrict. He wondered how Siri knew this particular private detail of his life, he assumed she felt it through their bond, but he wouldn’t put it past his old Master telling her at some point. 

“Or if he’s sad about Master Qui-Gon?” Anakin asked in a voice that was a failed attempt at whispering. 

Siri glanced towards where she knew Obi-Wan was standing. “Especially when he’s sad about Master Qui-Gon.” 

It was at that moment that Obi-Wan decided he needed to make his presence known. He stepped around the corner with his hands on his hips. “Smells delicious, what’s for dinner?”

“I made you tea Master!” Anakin quickly picked up the mug of tea and thrust it into his Master’s hands, spilling a little of the hot liquid over his fingers. 

Obi-Wan grimaced as he felt the tea burn his fingers. “Thank you Anakin, but please be a little more careful when bringing it to me next time, I need these hands to wield a lightsaber you know.” 

Siri smirked as she began to dish up the food. “I hope you’re hungry because I made Mygeeto Burritos.”

Obi-Wan stepped closer to the stove and inhaled fondly. “Oh, I haven’t had these since the last time Qui-Gon and I were on Mygeeto, you are amazing.” 

//Well, you are easy to please.// 

He took a big sip of his tea as he heard her flirtatious tone through their bond, hoping the hot liquid could hide the sudden redness of his cheeks. He then turned his attention to Anakin. “Why don’t you get cleaned up for dinner my young apprentice.” 

Anakin groaned. 

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow. “I am not having this fight with you again Anakin, hygiene is important, plus one day we will be dining with dignitaries and manners can be all the difference in getting a treaty signed or not.” 

Anakin huffed dramatically and stomped into the freshner. Obi-Wan took another sip of his tea and turned back to Siri who was bringing dishes to the table. “I swear I don’t quite understand his affinity for dirt.”

Siri shrugged. “That’s because you have always been insanely anal-retentive about cleanliness and having everything in order.” 

“That’s preposterous.” 

“Please, sometimes I think your main aversion to the Agri-corps was because you’d have to work in the dirt all day.” She kept her tone playful. 

He rolled his eyes. “Oh yes, soil is the real reason I didn’t wish to be sent off to the Agri-corps.”

Anakin rushed back into the room, holding up his hands for inspection. Obi-Wan gave him a nod of approval and then the boy plopped down at the dining room table. Obi-Wan carried his mug of tea over to the table and took his spot across from his apprentice. They both then turned back to look at Siri who was gathering her cloak off the back of the couch. 

“You’re not staying?” Obi-Wan asked. 

Siri shrugged. “I think you two need some time to yourselves.” 

“She can stay, can’t she Master Obi-Wan?” Anakin asked his Master. 

“Well Anakin, I’d love it if Siri would join us for dinner, but we may be keeping her from an assignment from her own Master.” Obi-Wan used the situation as a learning moment for Anakin while still letting Siri know he’d prefer her company. 

The blonde haired Jedi smiled and placed her cloak back on the couch. “I can stay, I don’t want to disturb Master Gallia right now anyways.” 

“Anakin, please grab another plate.” Obi-Wan instructed, keeping his eyes on Siri. 

//Everything okay with Master Gallia?// He asked through their bond as she sat down at the table.

//Don’t worry about it.//

Anakin returned with another place setting and the three Jedi began dishing their food. The young boy immediately began to shovel large bites of the thin wrap made of flour filled with meat and cheese.

“Anakin, please be sure to put some actual vegetables on your plate.” Obi-Wan instructed and received another groan from his young charge. He took a small bite of his own burrito and returned his gaze to Siri who seemed to be avoiding looking in his direction.

//Are you actually okay Siri?//

Her eyes suddenly met his. //If I said I was fine would you actually believe me?//

//Nope.//

She sighed and took a bite of the root vegetables on her plate, without answering him.

//...though if you assured me, of course I’d believe you.// He spoke softly through their bond. //No words are worthless. I just want to know how you actually are.// 

She made sure her shields were strong. //I’ll be fine, things didn’t go well on our last mission and Adi said she needs time to meditate on it. I’m sure it’ll blow over by tomorrow. We just need some space right now.//

Obi-Wan looked at her and nodded so slightly that it would’ve been missed had Siri not been looking directly at him. The Jedi Knight then turned his attention back to his apprentice.   
“Anakin, please chew your food. This is not a race.” 

*****

Obi-Wan quietly closed Anakin’s door and sighed in relief. He then walked into the kitchen where he found Siri cleaning the dinner dishes. 

“Finally asleep?” Siri asked, washing a plate and putting it in the dishrack.

“Seems to be, hopefully tonight he actually stays asleep the whole night. I think I need to talk to Master Yoda on how to help Anakin with his nightmares.” He said with a yawn and then looked at her. “I’ll do those in the morning, you’ve done enough for one day Siri.” He walked up behind her and turned off the water. “Don’t worry, I’ll still be as big of a mess tomorrow. You don’t have to fix everything in one night.” 

She turned around to face him and he tilted his head in concern. Even without a bond he could tell she didn’t want to leave. “Would you be interested in watching a holovid with me? After Anakin goes to bed it gets really quiet and I could use the company.” 

She nodded. “Well, if it’ll help you.” 

“I insist.” He smiled.

**  
The energy field gave the room a sinister red glow, which made the scene enfolding before his eyes look like it came directly from the ninth layer of Corellian hell. Frantic blue/grey eyes tried to remember his teaching, tried to focus on the Force but all he could sense was darkness. Red and green lights clashed in blurs, the two figures wielding the weapons danced around one another. 

‘Why hasn’t this force field dropped yet?’ 

Another series of blows, the taller opponent growing tired. A heartbeat could be heard now behind his ears as he watched. The Force seemed to scream at him to do something, but all could do was watch. A blow to the face, knocking the green saber off balance, leaving his chest unprotected, the sound of lightsaber through flesh and the smell will forever be burned into his psyche. 

“NOOOOOOOOOOOO!” 

Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. Those words have never rang so true in his mind. He pulls his eyes away from the limp form on the ground and stares viciously into the red-rimmed gold eyes of the Sith. 

Pointed teeth snarl up into a smile, one word is uttered. “Revenge.” 

Obi-Wan’s eyes snap open for a moment, his senses are on high alert, searching for danger. It is when he smells the blend of vanilla and lilacs coming from the blonde head resting against his chest does he realize he is safe. He immediately slams his mental shields up, not wanting to wake up the sleeping form next to him nor his young apprentice in the other room. 

He takes a shaky hand and runs it over his exhausted eyes, rubbing any moisture that may have collected in them as a result of his dream. It was the same scene that played out inside his head every night since Naboo, only this time the Sith speaking to him is new. 

He looked down and saw Siri had fallen asleep curled up against him, he had draped an arm around her and appeared to have been holding her tightly as they slept. He began to wonder who initiated the physical contact, and decided at that moment he didn’t care. Having her presence next to him was soothing and the usual fear that accompanied the nightmare seemed to vanish as he listened to her steady breathing. 

The grieving, touch starved, secret romantic in him wanted to drag this intimate moment out longer, but the Jedi Knight who had devoted his life to upholding certain ideals knew he had to avoid such temptations. He also realized he would not be able to sleep much longer while sitting up on the couch without paying for it with a bad crick in the neck the following morning. He sighed when he realized his only option was to move himself to the sleep couch in the Master bedroom. 

He carefully and skillfully shifted out from under Siri’s body and gently laid her down on the couch without waking her. He then took the knitted blanket off of Qui-Gon’s reading chair and draped it over his friend. He looked down at her sleeping face and softly ran his thumb over her cheek. 

“Sleep well luv.”

After a moment he moved into the bedroom and, given his exhaustion climbed into the bed without another thought, he was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. Siri waited until she heard his quiet snores, she sat up on the couch and looked back towards the bedroom door. 

‘There Bant you happy? We finally got him off the couch.’ She thought to herself. 

She then used the Force to quietly close his bedroom door, grabbed her boots and headed to spend one final night in her own bed, trying to ignore her anxieties about what she’d have to do the next day.

"May the Force be with you as my heart always is." She softly said in the direction of his closed door. "Please know I never wanted to hurt you...I hope one day you'll forgive me."   
*****  
TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Anakin’s Tooka doll is not my creation, it was from Meysun’s story that continues to inspire this one. Siri’s imaginary friend however is based on my own black and white cat named Scaramouche who I bounce story ideas off of while I type (one of my friends calls him Mooshie). 
> 
> Mygeeto Burritos are a real thing in the Star Wars galaxy, sure it’s from a Lego game, but it still counts...right??
> 
> I want to thank everyone for the wonderful feedback I’m receiving from this story! I hope I can continue to make the characters believable. 
> 
> I’ve mapped out the rest of the plot and there are only two more chapters left - while I love writing this story I realize that it can’t get dragged on forever without getting old. Guess I’ll have to just write other stories with Obi and his friends down the road...darn. 
> 
> If this chapter didn’t have enough angst for you then not to worry, the next two will definitely make up for it.


	6. Chapter 6: Garen Babysits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garen and Anakin bond over starfighters  
> Obi-Wan tries to explain the Jedi's stance on freeing slaves  
> Siri and Adi have a public altercation  
> Siri says goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a very difficult chapter to write - I wanted to give the appropriate angst/weight behind the situation while still remembering these are all Jedi. I hope it worked. 
> 
> This also ended up being WAY longer than I first anticipated this chapter, I started writing and so much tumbled out!

“Good young Skywalker, now stretch out with your feelings and you will be able to anticipate your opponent.” Cin Drallig watched over the young Padawan as he practiced the basic lightsaber form against a training probe. Obi-Wan stood next to the weapons master with his arms folded and observing his apprentice closely. 

“I appreciate you taking the extra time in working with Anakin Master Drallig” Obi-Wan said in a low voice to the Battlemaster “Sii-Cho was never my strength.” 

Cin Drallig smirked. “That is true, Form I never was where your talents lie Knight Kenobi, you used to trip over your feet if memory serves.” He clapped the younger Jedi on the shoulder. 

“I’m so very glad that is the impression I left you with.” Obi-Wan shook his head.

“But, I hear your Soresu is truly something to behold.”

Obi-Wan quirked an eyebrow. “Oh, I’m not sure about that. It’s early yet in my focus of the form.” 

“Changing a fighting form is not an easy transition. I admire you for realizing a shortcoming and adapting to something more suitable for your Force signature.” Master Drallig said in a familiar teacher voice. “Though you’ll never master the technique if you continue to use a hilt and a crystal that was made for someone’s hand other than your own.” He motioned to the hilt hanging off Obi-Wan’s belt.

The young knight looked down at Qui-Gon’s saber, then back up to Anakin. “I haven’t used it since Naboo Master Drallig, so you need not worry.”

“When do you leave for Ilum to replace your old saber?” The Battlemaster asked, carefully.

Obi-Wan shrugged. “I haven’t really given it much thought Master.” 

“Training sabers will only get you so far as you work on Soresu, that form in particular you must become an extension of your blade.” Cin’s watchful eyes never lost focus on Anakin blocking blaster bolts as he spoke. 

“Maybe I’ll just learn to use this one afterall,” He placed his fingers over the hilt on his belt. “I have some friends who’d be happy if I switched to a green blade.”

“You will do what you feel is right of course.” Master Drallig answered and then called out to Anakin. “Keep your elbow up Padawan!” He sighed and returned to the conversation with Obi-Wan. “You learned first hand that these are more than just a weapon, they are our lives. And the kyber crystals bond to us as much as any Master or student does so I understand you feel loss without your old crystal. But, they also bond to a particular fighting style. That one,” he motioned to Qui-Gon’s saber again. “Was meant for the strength of Ataro. Your crystal never was.”

Obi-Wan bristled at the suggestion that he had been ill trained by his former Master. “I had no issues with Ataro, if my Master felt that is where our strength as a team was then who am I to question it?”

“So why change it now?” Cin Drallig stole a quick glance at Obi-Wan. “I doubt it’s simply to compensate for the  _ Sai Tok _ .” 

The young Jedi had no response.

“Your former Master was incredibly skilled at Ataro, but I was surprised when he insisted you adopt his fighting style.” Cin sighed. “Especially since he made such a big deal about finding his own form instead of just following in Master Dooku’s footsteps and focusing on Makashi.”

“I couldn’t imagine Master Jinn attempting Makashi.” Obi-Wan smiled despite the discussion of his Master making his throat tighten. 

“You want to talk about someone tripping over their feet,” The Battlemaster glanced at Obi-Wan with a kind smile. “Needless to say the experiment didn’t last very long.” 

“From what I heard about Master Dooku I’m sure that was quite the fight.” The younger Jedi smiled back. 

“I was sorry to hear about him leaving the Order.” Cin Drallig turned his attention back to Anakin as he spoke. “Given the timing I can’t imagine it was easy for you to hear.” 

“In all honesty Master Drallig my sorrow for my Grand-Master’s departure is probably less than most in the temple. Truth be told I never met him, so all I have to know him by is his reputation and a few stories from Qui-Gon.” Obi-Wan shrugged. “I always did want to challenge him to a duel though, just to see if the stories held up.”

At that moment the training probe finished the scenario and Anakin lifted his visor. Cin Drallig moved towards the Padawan while speaking over his shoulder to Obi-Wan. “Sith-killer or not, he would’ve wiped the floor with you I’m sorry to say.”

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes at his new nickname, really hoping it didn’t stick. He didn’t like to be associated with that particular moment in his life, nor to be associated with violence.

“I think I got more of them that time.” A sweaty Anakin smiled with pride.

Cin Drallig folded his arms and nodded at the young boy. “Indeed Padawan Skywalker, a vast improvement from yesterday. You catch on very quickly.” 

“When can I get a real lightsaber?” Anakin excitedly asked, waving around his practice saber.

Obi-Wan stepped forward. “In due time my young apprentice, but for now you need to learn the basics before you are ready for the real thing.” 

“One must learn how to walk before they can learn how to run.” Cin Drallig added. 

“Yes Masters,” Anakin’s tone was full of disappointment. 

Cin Drallig clapped Anakin on the shoulder. “Patience young one, at the rate you’re mastering these katas you’ll be the one training lightsaber combat in no time.” He then turned to Obi-Wan. “I must prepare the room for my first class, shall we pick this up again tomorrow morning?”

Obi-Wan looked at Anakin who was putting his training saber and helmet away. “I appreciate it Master Drallig, but that does mean no sleeping in tomorrow Padawan.” 

“I know, I know.” Anakin grumbled.

Anakin ran towards the door, but Obi-Wan stopped him by placing a hand on the back of his neck and turned him back around to face the Battlemaster. Obi-Wan bowed and squeezed Anakin’s shoulder to remind him to do the same. 

As the Master/Padawan team exited the training dojo Anakin looked up at his Master. “Master Obi-Wan since I don’t have a class till later could I go help Garen with the star fighter engine? He told me at breakfast that he was going to be working on it all day.” 

Obi-Wan sighed. “If I recall you haven’t done your morning meditations yet.” 

Anakin groaned. 

“But, I’ll let it slide just this once.” Obi-Wan smiled down at his apprentice, then realized he had already let Anakin skip meditation on multiple occasions, something he took a mental note to not get into the habit of doing. 

_ ‘Besides, there is a lesson here in the importance of helping others.’ He heard his Master’s voice in his head as if to justify the decision.  _

_ ‘At the expense of our commitments?’ He heard his younger voice argue. “That doesn’t seem right.” _

“You will have to double up on meditation tonight before bed then.” Obi-Wan compromised and Anakin nodded in agreement. 

As they made their way into the temple hanger bay Anakin’s eyes went wide as he took in the various ships and speeders. Obi-Wan could feel the young boy’s contentment through the Force, he was glad that something in the temple made Anakin feel more at home. 

They found Garen tucked away in one of the corners of the hanger, wearing a pair of oil stained coveralls and goggles. He was elbows deep inside the engine, trying to secure or take apart a portion of the machine (Obi-Wan wasn’t sure which). Anakin was having trouble remaining at Obi-Wan’s side, wanting to run and help with the engine. The young Jedi Knight shook his head and motioned for Anakin to run ahead of him. 

“Wow Garen, this is so wizard!” He called out as he ran towards the pile of parts. 

Obi-Wan was about to correct his apprentice’s lack of formalities when he realized that Garen wouldn’t care. He then noticed a familiar form lounging across a couple of durasteel crates. 

“Quinlan, how is it you perpetually have nothing to do?” He asked, leaning up against one of the crates. 

“Kenobi, how is it you perpetually have a stick up your…”

Obi-Wan coughed loudly, cutting him off and motioning to Anakin. Quinlan Vos lowered the shaded glasses he was wearing (indoors Obi-Wan noted and assumed it was due to a hangover) and stuck his tongue out at Obi-Wan and then smiled at Anakin. 

“Hey Boonta Eve, Kava are you?” He asked, sitting up to greet Anakin in Huttese. “Kava’s doe old nek?” 

“Nee choo wanna wanga Quinlan,” Anakin answered in perfect Hutese, smiling. “Me tinka sad.” 

Quinlan nodded. “Jeeska je posted.”

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow, despite Huttese being a language he was still trying to master he knew they were talking about him. 

“Careful Quinlan, I don’t need you teaching him any foul words in Huttese.” Obi-Wan folded his arms and leaned against one of the crates. 

“Are you kidding me, the kid is from Mos Espa, if anything he’s teaching ME dirty words in Huttese!” Quinlan smirked, dipping his shades to wink at Anakin. 

Obi-Wan decided to ignore Quinlan’s remark (despite the fact that he knew it was true). “Anakin, why don’t you see if there is a pair of coveralls that’ll fit you.” 

“Yippee!” 

They watched as the boy ran towards the hanger maintenance office. Garen then acknowledged his friend with a nod, holding up his hands that were covered in grease otherwise he’d partake in his and Obi-Wan’s handshake. Obi-Wan gave a nod in return. 

“Thanks for letting him help out Garen.” Obi-Wan exclaimed after Anakin was out of earshot. “It helps to keep some of this stuff out of our quarters. I’m getting tired of stepping on the bolts that keep being discarded on the floor.”

“Hey man, kid’s tiny hands squeeze into tight spots better than mine so you’re actually helping me out.” Garen replied, tapping a hydro-spinner against his palm. “Most Masters aren’t gracious enough to lend their precious Padawans to us for manual labor, so, we thank you.” 

Obi-Wan smirked and threw a nearby rag at his friend who laughed as it smacked him in the face. 

“By the way, I heard you installed a T-14 hyperdrive by yourself while in the field.” Garen whistled in appreciation. 

“It really wasn’t that impressive Gar, I didn’t have to rebuild anything just drop a new one in.” Obi-Wan shrugged. 

“Yeah, sorry I couldn’t help you guys on Tatooine.” Quinlan’s voice sounded genuinely apologetic. “I saw Qui-Gon in Mos Espa...actually I saw your kid break up a fight.”

Obi-Wan chuckled. “You’re kidding.”

“Nah man, he stopped a Dug from beating the kriff out of some lanky aquatic creature that really stood out like a sore thumb.” 

“Let me guess, the lanky creature got in trouble with the Dug for being clumsy.” Obi-Wan chuckled. 

“You called it.”

“...Of course he did.” Obi-Wan pinched the bridge of his nose as he remembered the obnoxious although well meaning Gungan. 

“I overheard your transportation woes, but there wasn’t any way I could help without blowing my cover.” Quinlan explained. 

“I understand Quin, the mission comes first.” He shrugged. “Besides, my Master told me he spotted you, we assumed you were undercover. Was it anything exciting?”

Quinlan sat up with his legs dangling over the side of the crate. “Exciting, I suppose that depends on your definition of the word, but parts of it was interesting. Sadly, I’m about to head back to Tatooine so I can’t share any details yet.” 

“Are you going back to free the slaves this time?” A hopeful small voice asked. 

Quinlan looked from the kid to Obi-Wan. “Seriously how does someone with a supernova of a Force signature keep sneaking up on us like that?”

Obi-Wan knelt down in front of his young apprentice. “Master Vos is going on an undercover mission, it is very dangerous so it’s imperative that few people as possible know the details.”

“But, I won’t lie to you kid. I’m not going there to free slaves.” Quinlan removed his shades. “I wish I was.”

Anakin looked at the ground. “I thought the Jedi were supposed to help people.”

Quinlan and Garen both tried to make themselves look busy in hopes of avoiding having to have such a heavy discussion before lunch. Obi-Wan placed a soft hand on Anakin’s shoulder and forced him to look up. 

“Helping the innocent is at the center of the Jedi’s belief system. And it is what we as Jedi try to do with each of our missions.” His mind was racing to try and explain this complicated topic with a young former slave. “But, the Jedi have to be careful not to abuse our power. That is what the Sith did over a thousand years ago, they had a very destructive Sith Empire. We do not want anything like that to happen again, That is why we serve the Republic, because it would be dangerous for anyone with the power of the Force to be placed in charge of a government.” He tilted his head to the side. “Does that make any sense Padawan?”

“I guess so,” 

“As much as it hurts we can’t just rush in and liberate a planet from an oppressive ruler. Even if those rulers are sleemos like the Hutts.” Quinlan tried to help with the explanation. “At least not without something set up to take their place.”

“Why not?”

“That’s a very good question, my young apprentice.” Obi-Wan smiled. “One of the reasons is there aren’t enough Jedi to rebuild an entire government. We aren’t meant to be soldiers, and even if there were an army of us we’d realistically be using our power to forcibly take over a planet. And that is wrong even if it’s for good intentions. We believe in Democracy, and it’s up to the Republic to negotiate with these planets to bring about the change needed.” 

“It just feels like no one cares.” Anakin’s eyes were watery by this point.

Obi-Wan’s face softened. “If the Republic called in the Jedi to end slavery tomorrow, then believe me Anakin, I would be on the front lines.” 

“We all would.” Garen chimed in with an affirmative nod from Quinlan.

“So, there is nothing the Jedi can do?” Anakin asked, wiping his eyes with his sleeve.

Obi-Wan sighed. “For the outer rim and the planets not yet a part of the Republic unfortunately there is little that the Jedi can legally do. But, that doesn’t mean we aren’t negotiating and working to free slaves within the Republic. There are anit-slavery laws…”

“Oh yeah, Padme talked about those!” The boy’s face suddenly brightened at the thought of the Queen of Naboo. 

“You see, it’s not that the Republic doesn’t care about the slaves…” Obi-Wan found himself glancing up at Quinlan and Garen who both were tilting their hands back and forth in a gesture that meant the statement was questionable. “It’s just a slow process I’m afraid, my young Padawan. But, let’s not lose hope that you’ll see an end of slavery in the galaxy within your lifetime.” 

“Chancellor Palpatine will help.” Anakin said with assurity. 

Obi-Wan ruffled Anakin’s hair. “...yeah, we’ll see, but I truly hope he does Anakin.” 

Anakin nodded and then turned his attention to the engine, speaking with Garen about what needed to be repaired. Obi-Wan leaned back against the crates again, running a hand over his face. 

“Damn, that was impressive.” Quinlan exclaimed. “Only you with the silver tongue can condense complicated politics and explain them on the fly to a nine year old.” He clapped Obi-Wan on the back. “And you were able to hide your hatred of Politicians. Sorry, your hatred of non Mandalorian politicians.” 

Obi-Wan glared at Quinlan. “You have this remarkable talent to be able to give someone a compliment while simultaneously insulting them.” 

“You have your talents, I have mine.” He leaned back against the crates again, putting his shaded glasses back on.

“Garen, is it alright if Anakin stays with you for a while? I’m supposed to be meeting Siri for a sparring session.” Obi-Wan decided to change the subject with Quinlan.

“Yeah, no problem.” 

Quinlan sat up. “You’re meeting up with Tachi?”

“That was the idea.” 

“She’s in with the Council, sounds like it’s going to be an all day thing because they cancelled my briefing.” He explained. 

Obi-Wan placed a hand up to his chin, he could feel the stubble beneath his fingers. He remembered Siri acting odd the previous night. “Do you know what’s going on?”

“Not a clue.” 

Obi-Wan tilted his head. “Come on Vos, there is literally no way for people to keep secrets from you. It’s rather inferrierating most of the time.” 

“Look, I don’t have any details, but I think things on Siri’s last mission went really Tits up.” Vos swung his legs as he spoke. “Like, repercussions from the Senate bad.” 

Obi-Wan found himself reaching out to Siri through their pair bond only to be met with extremely strong shields. He was not surprised by this, but he felt bad for his friend, being partnered with a Jedi like Qui-Gon Jinn Obi-Wan was not a stranger to all day lectures from the Jedi Council. It still was never pleasant. 

“Well, I suppose I’ll make myself useful and head to the archives.” Obi-Wan pushed himself up from the crates. 

“Maybe a nap?” Quinlan suggested.

Obi-Wan laughed. “If Madame Nu catches me falling asleep in the archives again she might just ban me.” 

“Please, you got that old Rancor wrapped around your little finger.” Quinlan huffed. “Yet when I need to research something I get interrogated.” 

“You might want to try learning how to be courteous one of these days my friend. You’ll find it makes your life much easier.” Obi-Wan smiled. “Anakin, I’ll be back to pick you up later for History class.” 

“Okay Master Obi-Wan.” Anakin said as he peeked out from under the engine. 

“Don’t worry about it Obi, I’ll make sure the kid gets to his classes and drop him off at the archives later.” Garen offered which received a curious eye brow furrow from Obi-Wan. “Take the day off, because you look like shavit and clearly need a break.” 

“Remind me again why am I friends with you people?” Obi-Wan said in a joking huff and then dipped his head as a thank you to Garen. 

“Anakin, please be mindful.” He said before turning to leave.

“Sure!” 

With a chuckle beneath his breath he decided not to chide his Padawan for the less than formal response. He then had a fleeting thought if it was a good idea for him to leave his impressionable boy in the hands of Quinlan Vos and Garen Muln, but in that moment he was too tired to care and grateful to have an afternoon to himself. He decided he would treat himself to a nice cup of Sapphire tea, a good holobook and curl up in his favorite reading nook in the archives. 

Everything else he decided could wait. 

*****

“You will have lodging provided tonight in an inn called Trueping’s, it’s located in the Slum District. There you will find the necessities to change your appearance however you feel is best as well as a private comlink with an encrypted direct channel to the Council.” Mace Windu explained, leaning forward in his seat, resting his elbows on his knees. 

“The comlink is a one way communication device, we will not be able to contact you.” Deppa Billaba softly stated. “This way you are the one in control of our communications, only to be used when you are sure your identity will not be compromised.”

“This does mean that we will have no way of keeping track of your whereabouts or progress unless you reach out to us.” Ki-Adi-Mundi interjected. 

“I understand Masters.” Siri hoped her voice didn’t show any of the nerves that were beginning to settle in the pit of her stomach. 

“There will be a limited amount of credits provided as well to get you started.” Plo Koon’s voice was raspy beneath his breathing mask as it always was yet it also sounded very tired. “Beyond that I’m afraid getting credits to you will be extremely difficult, so use them wisely.” 

Siri nodded in understanding, she wasn’t too worried considering she knew her persona would need to find various odd jobs to make her story believable anyways. 

“Krayn’s base of operation is a well guarded secret young one,” Evan Piell chimed in next. “But our intel suggests you should find transport to the planet Florrum, there is an unusually high amount of pirate activity in that system, I’m afraid we have not much else to go on.”

“At least it’s a starting place.” Siri said with more confidence in her voice than she was feeling. “Thank you Masters.” 

She scanned the faces of the Jedi Council, noticing all twelve members had various levels of concern on their stoic faces. They all knew that this mission was a great risk, and Siri could almost feel the guilt within the Force at their choosing an inexperienced member of their order to take such a mission on their young shoulders. There is always a risk of death for a Jedi in any mission, but this was like walking into a Wampa’s cave wearing a suit made of fresh Taun-Taun meat. 

They all kept telling themselves to trust in the Force, while terrifying they all knew logically speaking this mission had to be kept a secret not only from other Jedi but also the Senate. Krayn’s reach extended far into the core of the Republic, and it was clear he had associates in the highest levels of government, so they didn’t know who they could trust. Siri, while just barely made a Knight, was an exceptional Jedi who had a talent for improvising and had exceeded at every undercover mission she had been given (even as a child). She also was relatively unknown to the Republic (as most Padawans are in an effort to keep them protected) so despite the misgivings the twelve Jedi Masters had they knew any other Jedi with more experience would be easily recognizable. It was unfortunate, but Siri was the only logical choice for this mission. They only hoped that if she survived that she would be strong enough to resist the pull to the dark side, knowing that her mission would require her to stray far from the Jedi Code.

Siri’s eyes landed on her former Master who was staying uncharacteristically quiet. Adi had been keeping to herself, seemingly trying to keep a distance between her and her apprentice since the previous day. Siri wondered how much of Adi’s reaction was due to fear or was her already working on her side of the deception. She assumed it was a combination of both. 

“Mind what you have learned, save you it can.” Yoda quietly spoke next, his grip tightened over his gimmar stick. “And when you look at the dark side, careful you must be, for the dark side looks back.” 

Siri bowed her head towards the Grandmaster of the Jedi Order, the most powerful Force user in the galaxy. She could hear the seriousness of his words yet it was laced with affection that Master Yoda only usually spoke with whenever training younglings. Something about his tone made her eyes water, but she had resolved not to allow any tears to fall until she was alone in her room at Trueping’s. 

“It is time then,” Master Windu sighed and all of the other Council members rose from their seats. 

“Masters, could I have a private moment with my Padawan?” Adi requested and was not met with any argument. 

Siri waited in the center of the chamber as the other eleven members made their way out, Plo Koon and Depa Billaba stopping to place a hand on her shoulders and a few last words of encouragement before exiting the room. Siri turned her eyes to Adi who was staring out the large window at the Coruscanti skyline. Dark clouds hovered over the city, casting long, ominous shadows through the room. The two women sat in silence for what felt like an eternity to Siri.

“Looks like a storm is coming in.” She tried to break the nauseating silence.

“I want you to know how proud I am of you Siri.” Adi softly said, ignoring Siri’s attempt at small talk, her voice attempting to be void of emotion. “I always knew you were destined to be a great Jedi Knight.” 

“All because of your training Master Gallia.” Siri folded her arms within the large sleeves of her cloak. 

Adi gave a half smile, still not looking at the girl she raised. “I can only take a portion of the credit young one, your dedication to the Order is unwavering.” She finally turned to look at Siri. “You must rely on that dedication now more than ever.” 

“I won’t let you down Master Gallia.”

The Tholothian Jedi moved towards Siri, placing her hands on both of the younger Jedi’s shoulders. “Please remember whatever is said during the deception...I...I don’t mean any of it. I am so, so honored to have been your Master.” 

Siri looked into the unusually sad eyes of the only mother she had ever known. She couldn’t stop herself from moving into a warm embrace, one she hadn’t experienced with Adi in years. 

“I understand Master, you must use my faults and insecurities to make this believable.” Siri worked hard to hold back the tears. “We mustn’t let personal feelings get in the way...either of us.” 

Adi wrapped her arms around Siri and kissed her on top of the head. “When did you become so wise?” 

Siri lifted her head off of Adi’s chest and looked up at her former Master. “A couple of years ago when you weren’t looking.” 

A soft, sad chuckled filled the empty council chamber, followed by a beat of uncomfortable silence. The sound of distant thunder broke up the serene moment. Adi released the younger woman from the hug. “Come, we’ve delayed this moment long enough.” 

“Are you ready for this?” Siri asked.

Adi shook her head. “The question is, are you ready for this Siri?”

Siri took a deep breath and nodded. She then closed her eyes and called upon the Force, when her eyes opened Adi immediately saw she had dipped into character, rage and betrayal were evident on her facial features and Siri stormed out of the Council chambers, leaving a stunned Adi Gallia in her wake.

****

_ Glowing yellow eyes peered down at him from above, sparks from the red blade singed his ears and his fingers that desperately grabbed hold of the nozzle.  _

_ “You will suffer, as I have suffered.” The Sith apprentice sneered.  _

_ The moment seemed to go in slow motion, it was as if he could see it before it happened - the flow of the Force to aid his jump, the lightsaber flew to his outstretched hand as he flipped over his surprised opponent, the use of the forbidden move that cut the Sith in half.  _

_ Again, the smell of lightsaber meeting flesh would forever be burned into his nose.  _

_ The sound of pained and shallow breathing from the form on the ground, the sound of boots on the durasteel floor, the weight of a body as it is shifted into his lap.  _

_ “It’s too late, too late…” that voice had never sounded so small.  _

_ Desperately in denial. “No,”  _

_ “Obi-Wan…” Midnight blue eyes look into his, fear that has never been seen before now etched into those familiar and comforting orbs.  _ _ “Only by remembering the past are we able to learn from the present.” _

Obi-Wan snaps awake, suddenly realizing he is being summoned by a young voice. 

“Master Obi-Wan, are you okay? Please wake up!” Anakin’s face was flushed as if he had been running.

“Anakin,” the groggy Jedi Knight tried to get his bearings. “I...um...I must’ve dozed off. What time is it?”

“You were scared, I felt it...in the Force, I think.” Anakin seemed worried and confused. 

Obi-Wan sat up and cleared his throat. “It was nothing Anakin, merely a dream.” He offered a small smile. “And remember what I’ve told you?”

“Dreams pass in time.” Anakin grumbled, he didn’t like that answer.

“Padawan Skywalker, do I need to give you another lesson on how to conduct yourself inside the archives?” Jocasta Nu exclaimed, it was clear based on the few fly-aways on her bun that she had been chasing his wayward apprentice. 

Garen was right behind her. “Man, that kid is fast.” 

“Madame Nu, my sincerest apologies.” Obi-Wan stepped in for his apprentice. “I was supposed to meet Anakin and I wasn’t there, he was concerned.” He looked down at his apprentice who was avoiding looking at the Jedi Archivist. “It won’t happen again, will it my young apprentice.” 

“No sir.” 

“What should you say to Master Nu?” He coaxed.

Anakin looked up at her with bright blue eyes. “I’m sorry Madame Nu, I will try to be more mindful next time.” 

Jocasta Nu saw the sincerity within the child’s eyes and she could not help but soften her features. “This is a place of quiet study and reverence, young one, do try to remember that in the future.” She then turned to address Obi-Wan. “And Knight Kenobi, while your presence is always welcome here in my halls if I hear snoring again I will personally drag you back to your quarters.” 

Obi-Wan sheepishly nodded, embarrassed. “Duly noted Madame Jocasta.” 

Madame Nu looked at both the new Master and Apprentice and shook her head as she turned to leave.  _ ‘This lineage is going to be the death of me.’ _

“Sorry Garen, I hope he didn’t give you too much trouble.” Obi-Wan asked as he stood up, receiving a glare from his young padawan. 

“We had fun today, didn’t we Anakin?” Garen smiled and Anakin nodded. 

“I got to see a Delta-7 prototype Master Obi-Wan!” Anakin beamed, the previous encounter forgotten.

“...That’s great Anakin, how were your classes?” Obi-Wan asked, rubbing his tired eyes.

Anakin just shrugged. “I don’t know if Master Ti likes me very much.” 

Obi-Wan tilted his head and patted Anakin on the shoulder. “Trust me Anakin, she likes you very much, just be mindful that it’s her job to make sure you’re paying attention which as you know sometimes wanders.”

Anakin grumbled.

“You guys want to beat the evening meal rush and head down to the Refectory?” Garen decided to change the subject. “I don’t know about you, but I could eat as much as Reeft right now.”

“I’m not sure that’s a bar you want to try and jump Gar,” Obi-Wan chuckled. “But, sounds perfect my friend, sound good to you Padawan?” He asked and Anakin nodded excitedly. 

Garen then took stock of Obi-Wan, noticing how tired he looked despite the fact that he had clearly taken a nap - in the middle of the archives - for the second time in two weeks. Garen realized that maybe Bant hadn’t been too mother-hen about his condition after all. 

“Hey man, this is going to sound like a dumb question, but humor me…” Garen said as they made their way to the archive exit. “Are you actually doing okay?”

“I must really look bad for YOU to even venture to ask me that question.” Obi-Wan grumbled quietly, hoping Anakin wouldn’t overhear them. 

“Well, you’ve looked better.” 

Before Obi-Wan could answer all three of them sensed a strange disturbance in the Force and noticed a group beginning to gather just outside the archives. Obi-Wan placed his hands on Anakin’s shoulders in hopes that he wouldn’t get lost in the crowd as they made their way to the source of the disturbance. His eyes then turned towards the anger he was feeling in the Force, he was stunned to see it emanating from one of his best friends. 

“Padawan, please, this is not the appropriate place to discuss this.” Adi Gallia folded her arms across her chest.

“Oh no, you gave up the luxury of getting to call me that.” Siri hissed in an accusatory tone. “Don’t you dare try to go back on it now.” 

“You still hold the ranking of a Padawan even if you are no longer mine,” Adi kept her voice calm. 

Obi-Wan and Garen exchanged worried glances. 

“And since you will not be nominated for the trials I will address you as such.” Adi continued. “If you would like to discuss it further might I suggest going back to the Council chambers.” 

“Why should I bother being there when the twelve of you just make decisions without hearing both sides of a story? There seems little point in having my presence there.” Siri was shaking. “We both failed that mission Adi, why am I the only one being punished?”

“You’re not being punished.” 

“No?! How exactly am I not being punished, I don’t see you being demoted from the Council. I don’t see you having to start over.” She began to pace as she spoke. 

Anakin tried to see over the people standing in front of him, he began to grow frantic at the energy within the Force. Obi-Wan noticed and placed a hand on his shoulder. 

“Garen, could you maybe take Anakin to get some dinner?” He whispered quietly. 

“Yeah, sure thing.” Garen nodded, thankfully taking the hint. “Come on Anakin, we don’t need to deal with this drama.” 

Anakin wanted to protest, he was worried about his Master and his new friend Siri. But, the negative emotions in the Force were making him feel ill so he followed Garen. As soon as they were gone Obi-Wan turned back to the fight. He tried to reach out to Siri through their pair bond but was met by tight shields. 

“Just tell me why, why did you renounce me?” Siri pleaded, her voice breaking. “Give me probation sure, censure me even, but to dump me like the last twelve years didn’t matter to you just seems cruel.”

Adi straightened her stance, as if preparing for battle. “You are acting on emotions Siri, you need to center yourself.” 

“Enough! I just spent twelve hours hearing how I don’t deserve to be your apprentice anymore Adi, so I think I deserve to know the reasons why.” She almost growled and a chill ran down Obi-Wan’s spine. 

The Council member closed her eyes before speaking. “Because there is little more you can learn from me at this point Siri.” 

_ ‘But, he is capable. There is little more that he can learn from me.’ _

Obi-Wan’s heart felt like it would rip through his chest as memories came flooding back to standing in the center of the Council chamber about to be renounced himself. He suddenly had the urge to step in and defend Siri.

“Banta-shit Adi, you just want to be free of a Padawan.” Siri cursed. “Why not just nominate me for the trials?”

Adi sighed. “I don’t foresee you passing your trials Siri, at least not yet.”

A collective gasp was heard despite the room being full of Jedi. 

“What? I don’t believe you.” Siri looked hurt. “I have always been at the top of all my classes, I have worked tirelessly to do what you’ve asked me to do as an apprentice...give me a logical reason why not.”

“You are arrogant, you are aggressively combative, you obsess over perfection instead of accepting your flaws,you are either unable or unwilling to stay in the moment, and you allow your passions and anger to dictate many of your more recent choices.” Adi continued and Siri looked as though she was being punched repeatedly in the gut. “You refuse to let go of your attachments…”

Obi-Wan’s eyes suddenly went wide, worried their pair bond had been the catalyst for this situation.

“...How dare you.” Siri’s voice was low and forbidding. “You know exactly what I’ve given up for you...for the Jedi.”

Adi raised an eyebrow. “Have you?”

“Kriff you and the whole Kriffing Council.” Siri spat.

Adi then sighed. “Lastly, you don’t seem to be remorseful when it comes to taking a life.” 

“That isn’t fair...you know I had to kill him to save you.” Siri genuinely was shocked Adi would throw that in her face. “He was a Crime Lord, the galaxy is better off without him.” 

“A Jedi is not an executioner.” 

Obi-Wan felt his cheeks grow hot, he suddenly felt immense guilt. He couldn’t understand why he wasn’t being held to the same standard as Siri in this regard. 

“Of all the hypocritical, self-righteous excuses.” Siri stalked towards her former Master. “Jedi kill when it is necessary, why am I being singled out?”

Adi closed her eyes and struggled to say the next phrase. “Because, you took pleasure from the kill.” 

Another collective gasp and Obi-Wan shook his head in denial. He had seen Siri’s thoughts through their bond, there was no way she could’ve had such darkness inside of her...could she? 

Siri’s face was impassive as she stared down her former Master. “You think you know me, that twelve Jedi who barely leave the temple have any clue what the rest of us put ourselves through for you, for the precious code?” 

She knelt down and pulled a vibroblade from her boot and most of the Jedi in attendance immediately ignited their lightsabers as a precaution. Adi motioned for them to back away, keeping her eyes on Siri. The blonde former apprentice grabbed her Padawan braid and stretched it out to it’s full length, Obi-Wan shook his head in protest when he realized what was happening. 

Siri’s voice was cold and resolute. “I have given EVERYTHING to this order and to YOU, my life, my childhood, my love…” 

Obi-Wan felt his heart clench in his chest. 

“And yet it was still not enough…The Council asks us to give and give of ourselves and yet instead of creating support when we inevitably can’t live up to their standards they just dismiss us without a second thought.” Siri used the vibroblade to cut off her Padawan braid. “You renounce me Adi, well I renounce the Jedi Order.” She then dropped her lightsaber on the ground. “I’m done here.”

Siri then threw the braid at her former Master and raced to the nearest turbolift. Obi-Wan felt stunned as the crowd began to dissipate, he watched as Adi bent down to pick up the severed braid, he could see the pain on her face. He then felt Bant’s presence next to him, he looked down at her and she nodded up at him. 

“Go, I’ll keep an eye on Anakin.” 

He dipped his head in thanks and then raced after Siri, hoping there was something he could do. 

****

Obi-Wan realized that her shields were finally down, he could sense her anger and betrayal consuming her end of the bond. He tried to send waves of comfort to her, but it was almost as if he could hear her sarcastically laughing at him for caring. 

//Siri, where are you?//

//Stay out of it Obi-Wan.//

//You know I can’t do that...where are you?//

When she didn’t answer fear gripped his heart. He closed his eyes and focused on the Force and was able to pinpoint her location on the roof of the temple. 

“No...” it came out in a whisper and he used the Force to speed through the halls towards the nearest roof access stairwell. 

The storm was crashing all around him as he made his way onto the slippery rooftop, he frantically searched in the darkness for a familiar figure.

“Siri!” He called out, his voice being carried on the wind. 

“Go back to your Padawan, Kenobi.” Her voice could barely be heard over the rain. 

He rushed to her side, holding his arms out as if to stop her from jumping. “Siri, please...come back inside.” 

Siri didn’t turn to look at him. “The temple now knows the truth, they saw the person I have tried to hide from them all these years...the real me.” She finally looked at him. “You know I have to leave.” 

“No, that wasn’t you...it can’t be.” 

She smiled sadly and looked at him over her shoulder, the drops of rain running down her face. “You just refuse to see it because you don’t want to believe it.” She tilted her head. “I can’t be mad at you, the Jedi seem to be really good at ignoring what they don’t want to see.” 

“You don’t believe that.” 

“How do you know what I believe or don’t believe? I barely know who I am now, there is no way you could know.” Her voice was barely heard over the pouring rain.

“Because I know you, I know your heart.” His voice was earnest.

“I have spent twenty three years being told what to believe!” She spat. “And we’re told constantly that we need to be perfect and obedient servants, and then we slip up once and we’re passed aside for something better?” She shook her head. “You above all know what that feels like.”

He nodded. “Yes, I do. But that doesn’t mean we give up.”

“Then you’re stronger than I am...I’m done living a life like that.” She wrapped her arms around herself.

“So what, you’re just going to run away? Give up on your commitments?” He shouted over the rain as it grew harder. 

He stepped forward and took her hand in his. “Please, just do me a favor and picture your life ten years from now, or twenty years from now...where do you see yourself, truly see yourself?”

She avoided his eyes, hoping the rain would hide her tears when she heard the frantic tone in his voice. She shook her head as he continued. 

“If you truly feel it’s not in the service of something greater than yourself then go...If that was what I thought you truly wanted then I would let you go right now.” He held her shoulders, forcing her to look at him. “But, if you’re just looking for an easy way out then you’re not the Siri I know and love.” 

“Easy way?” She couldn’t help the tears now and she hated herself for it. “You think this is an easy way out...nothing about this is easy! So, don’t preach to me Obi-Wan.” 

“Ever since I’ve known you there has always only been one goal that mattered above everything else...to be a Jedi.” He reached up and wiped the tears with his thumb. Despite the fact that her face was drenched from the rain. “You mean to tell me that no longer matters to you? Do you even care about what we gave up for that dream?”

She couldn’t look at him, the topic was too painful. “I have to go,” 

“And who says that I can’t follow?” He asked, not releasing her shoulders. “You want to run, okay let’s run as far as we can.”

She looked at him with wide eyes, she could see he meant what he said through their bond. “Are you out of your mind? Don’t even joke about that.” 

“Who’s joking?” He placed his hands to cup her face. “Everything in this temple reminds me of what I lost, and if you leave it will only feel more like a prison. There is little keeping me here.” He sighed. “ I was accepted as an apprentice solely out of guilt then I left the Order and then almost renounced...By all accounts I shouldn’t be a Knight, maybe I will be doing the Force a favor by not trying to force something that isn’t meant to be.”

She knew he was hurting and full of grief, she had no idea he was so close to the edge. She now cursed herself for lingering to say goodbye to him. 

“That isn’t true and you know it...what about Anakin?” She finally asked. “No, Obi-Wan, you’re too much of a Jedi to follow me.” She leaned up and pressed her forehead to his. “But, I appreciate the dream, even if it was only for a moment.” 

“Siri, please don’t leave me.” His voice was a whimper. “I can’t lose you too.”

“I never wanted it to be this way...” She brushed her thumb over his cheek, it was her turn to wipe the tears. 

“Then why are you making it this way?” His voice was almost a whisper. 

She looked into his eyes, and spoke through their bond one last time.  _ //I had no other choice.// _

She used the Force to push him back, his boots sliding on the slick roof. As he regained his footing he noticed the sorrow in her eyes. He then felt a white hot pain inside his head as she severed the pair bond. He cried out in pain, held his head and dropped to his knees, feeling as if he would pass out. He tried to look for Siri, but she was gone and he was left alone in the rain. 

The last thing he remembered as he slipped into unconsciousness was the taste of copper as blood dripped down from his nose to his lips.

*****

_ TBC _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I warned you there’d be angst in these chapters. I know, I know...poor Obi-Wan. I just hope this chapter didn’t feel too out of character for everyone involved! 
> 
> Please, please take care of your emotional/mental health (especially if reading this triggered anything) - go read some fluff to balance it out.
> 
> Any comments are most welcome, I love to hear what you think!! 
> 
> BTW - The reference to Siri killing someone is made up by me, the only mention of Siri "leaving" is because she and Adi failed their mission to Kessel, no other details are given so I thought about what could actually be bad enough for the Council to basically demote her.
> 
> Huttese Translations:  
> Kava are you = How are you?  
> Kava’s doe old nek = How’s the old man?  
> Nee choo wanna wanga = Hi  
> Me tinka sad = I think sad  
> Jeeska je posted = Keep me posted


	7. Chapter 7 - Bant saves a life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bant performs a miracle  
> Siri becomes Zora  
> Obi-Wan makes a decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: I can’t believe the love that this story is receiving!! Over 100 kudos and over 1800 hits so far, not to mention all the wonderful comments! Thank you sooo much! 
> 
> I’ve had so much fun exploring this pivotal time in Obi-Wan’s life, and I especially want to give another shoutout to Meysun for letting me piggyback off of and gain inspiration from their fabulous story. https://archiveofourown.org/works/23579242/chapters/56573209
> 
> So, this chapter ended up being WAY too long so I decided to break it up into two chapters. This means there will only be one more chapter after this one and an epilogue... but, I do plan on spending time with all of these characters in future stories so please watch out for those!  
> Thanks again for reading, it means so very much to me!!

**Chapter 7**

The rain came down in sheets and the large drops stung her face, but it was a welcome feeling compared to the pain that radiated from inside her head and the guilt weighing down her chest, but she knew she couldn’t look back, she couldn’t stop. 

She leapt from one section of the roof to another, fighting the urge to go back and make sure that Obi-Wan was okay. She shook her head, she couldn’t think about him now, she knew she must focus on the mission, no matter the personal cost and every moment she lingered at the Temple the likelihood of running into another Jedi trying to stop her became more and more probable. Her throat catches another sob as she tries to push down the feelings of remorse. -  _ He’s a Jedi, he’ll understand _ she kept trying to force herself to believe, vowing if she survives this mission she would find a way to make it up to him one day (if he lets her).

Suddenly in front of her she spotted a looming figure standing at the edge of the roof, he slowly turned to face her, holding an object in his hands towards her. She was able to let go of the breath she had been holding when she saw the familiar face of Quinlan Vos. His expression changed between disappointment, sorrow and compassion as he looked at her. Siri stopped and looked up at him, her wet hair now sticking to her face and neck.

Quinlan held out a familiar lightsaber towards her. “Adi wanted me to bring this to you.” 

Siri could hear the seriousness of his tone, she knew once he had touched the saber he had seen everything through his retrocognition. She slowly took the hilt and hid it inside her robe, she found she couldn’t meet his accusatory gaze. 

“If you don’t sever it, he’ll be able to find you.” Quinlan’s voice was uncharacteristically angry. 

Siri’s vision swam with unshed tears and the pain throbbing inside her skull. “It’s already done.” She inhaled a shaky breath to steady herself. “South Eastern roof…” Her voice became more urgent as she continued. “Please hurry.” 

With just a nod of understanding the Kiffar Jedi ran past her in a blur. Siri knew if she looked back that she wouldn’t be able to leave and there were too many lives at stake to risk it. She had to make this sacrifice worth it, she couldn’t live with herself if she failed this mission after hurting one of the most important people in her life at a time when he needed her the most.

She called upon the Force to mask her presence from anyone else who might be looking for her and silently jumped down to the street below. 

*****

Quinlan Vos let very few things get under his skin, with the gift of retrocognition which allowed him to see memories just by touching objects he had learned at an early age that he couldn’t take things personally. Oftentimes that made him look unsympathetic or incapable of taking anything seriously. Nothing could be further from the truth, but Quinlan knew he couldn’t (for his own sanity) allow himself to grow close to very many people. The rule of attachment was less of a guideline and more of a means of survival for him. When you are able to see someone’s secrets just by touching an inanimate object it was hard for people to let their guard down around him. He understood this, and never begrudged people’s reactions. So, he kept his circle of friends limited and even they were always kept at an arm's length. And when he saw that Obi-Wan and Siri, two of the only people in his life he actually cared about (though he’d never let them know that) had foolishly rekindled their old pair bond without thinking about the consequences it infuriated him. 

He was probably the only person who truly knew what each of them had gone through the first time their bond had been severed when they were teenagers, and that was only because he had inadvertently handed one of them their cloak or brushed against their saber during a sparring match. He couldn’t believe they’d recklessly put themselves in this position again, not to mention the fact that Obi-Wan was now suffering through the second ripped mental bond in the span of two weeks he worried there could be lasting damage. 

“Kriffing idiots,” He cursed as he raced to find Kenobi.

He climbed up to the top of the South East side of the building and his heart lurched at the sight of his friend lying face down on the roof. Qunlan was kneeling by his side in a flash, turning him gently only to see blood pouring out of his nose. 

He pulled out his com, ready to contact the healers when a thought occurred to him suddenly. He realized if it was discovered that Obi-Wan had a pair bond it could risk his place in the Order not to mention his mentorship of Anakin, and that would destroy him. He cursed beneath his breath, frantically bringing up the group channel he shared with his friends. He hoped it was as private as Garen claimed it was.

“Garen, Reeft, I need immediate assistance on the South East roof.” He called into it. “Bant, prepare Obi’s bed and get your med kit.” He paused, waiting for a response which in his opinion took way to long. “Um...hello?”

“Yeah, we heard you Vos,” Garen’s voice was short. “We’re on our way, there’s just a lot of stairs.” 

A soft moan forced Quinlan to look down at the form lying in the rain. “Hang in there Kenobi, we’ll get you fixed up.” He sighed. “I hope.”

He found himself searching the horizon in the direction Siri had left, he knew the enormity of what she was facing and now she had to try to repair a severed bond on her own on top of that, he felt intense sympathy for her in that moment. 

“May the Force be with you little sister.” Quinlan stated beneath his breath as he sensed Garen and Reeft’s arrival. 

“Seven hells, Tachi must have one hell of a left hook to lay him out like this...seriously though, what’d she do to him?” Garen asked when they saw their friend’s limp form. 

“Later.” Vos looked up at the two Padawans. “Right now, we need to get him to his bed.” 

“He needs to go to the Halls.” Reeft exclaimed. 

Quinlan looked up at the two of them, hoping they would be able to read it on his face so he wouldn’t have to say it outloud. Garen, usually slow to pick up social cues, seemed to understand. 

“Karabast, it’s always the quiet ones...” He exclaimed and Quinlan nodded his head. Garen ran a frustrated hand through his wet hair, pushing it off his forehead. “Okay, Vos and I’ll carry him, Reeft you be the lookout.” 

Reeft, still not understanding the situation agreed with the plan - he would trust Garen with his life so he just went with it. They lifted their friend, Quinlan carried him by the arms and Garen by the legs and they made their way back into the temple, praying they didn’t run into any Masters.

*****

Bant’s stomach plummeted when she saw Garen and Quinlan rush into the apartment carrying Obi-Wan. She had been sitting on the couch with Anakin attempting to focus on his homework, but was up in a flash and following them to Qui-Gon's, now Obi-Wan’s bedroom. 

“We need to get these wet clothes off of him.” She commanded in her best healer tone and the boys went to work at stripping their friend down to his shorts. Bant leaned down to listen to his heart beat and check his pulse. 

“Blood pressure is 72/45, that is WAY too low. Heart rate is steady but low...temperature is 102.4. AND he doesn’t seem to be responding cognitively.” She closed her eyes and reached out with the Force. “And his presence in the Force is growing dim.” She opened her eyes and looked up at Garen and Quinlan. She took out a biometric scanner and hovered it over Obi-Wan’s head. She checked the results with a frown. “There is fluid building up inside his skull and it’s putting pressure on his brain, it's like he's bleeding out. What happened?”

Garen avoided her gaze and Quinlan rubbed the back of his neck. “It could be a severed bond.” 

Bant gave a quizzical look. “But, Master Che fixed his bleeding training bond two weeks ago. There was no evidence of fluid on the brain then.”

“...yeah, it might’ve been a new bond.” 

“Might’ve been?” Bant was fighting to remain calm. “If I’m going to treat him then I need to know what’s happened.” 

Before Quinlan could answer a small figure rushed into the room in a panic. Anakin saw the unconscious form lying on the bed, and tears immediately sprung to his eyes. 

“Master Obi-Wan? Wha...what’s happened to him?” He grabbed Obi-Wan’s hand tightly. “Did the Sith come back? ...please wake up Master Obi-Wan...Wake up!”

“Someone needs to take Anakin out of here,” Bant softly but urgently stated. 

Garen knelt down next to the boy. “Hey Anakin, you want to take a ride in the Delta 6? I’ll even let you take the wheel.” 

Anakin shook his head, gripping tighter to Obi-Wan’s hand. 

“Come on kid, your Master needs his rest.” Reeft tried to coax the boy.

As he reached down to pick the child up to take him out of the room, Anakin began to scream and the Force screamed with him. Various items in the room began to levitate and fly off the shelves, glassware shattered and anything metal in the room caved in on itself as if being crushed by an invisible hand. 

“Okay, someone’s going to notice this if we can’t get him to stop!” Garen exclaimed, ducking to avoid being pumuled by various objects floating around the room. 

Bant grabbed Anakin by the shoulders. “Alright Anakin you can stay, but you have to calm down now otherwise we won’t be able to help Obi-Wan.” 

Anakin immediately nodded, his mood quickly shifting back to concern instead of frantic and all the objects in the room dropped to the ground and the Force once again felt calm. The four friends exchanged glances and the unspoken phrase between them was  _ ‘good luck during his teenage years Kenobi.’ _

“Anakin, I need you to keep holding his hand and then try to focus on your Master in the Force.” Bant suggested, rising up to her feet. 

“What good will that do?” Anakin asked.

“It might help Obi-Wan find his way back from inside his mind if you focus really hard on him...okay?” She cupped his cheek with her webbed hand. “Keep calling for him through the Force.” 

Anakin looked up at her and then back down at Obi-Wan’s silent face. He nodded in determination and bit his bottom lip as he closed his eyes. Bant then turned and moved the other three boys out of the room so they could speak. 

“What is this about another bond?” She folded her arms across her chest.

Quinlan sighed. “He and Siri had a pair bond, I almost caught her right before she left the temple. She told me she severed it and that she left Obi-Wan on the roof.”

“I’m going to kill her.” Bant’s voice grew very protective. “How could she do this to him?”

“Hey, it takes two to bond.” Quinlan defended Siri, though not quite sure why.

“Yeah, but only one to sever a bond.” Reeft growled. 

Bant sighed and looked back towards the bedroom. “His mind was still healing from the rupture of the training bond he had with Master Jinn. I’m not sure what this will do to him, I haven’t been trained for something like this.” She brought her attention back to her friends. “He needs a Mind healer, or maybe Master Yoda...but, this is beyond my skill.” 

“Kriffing Tachi.” Garen huffed, returning from the ‘freshner with a towel to dry himself off.

“Bant, if the Council discovers his pair bond, they could take Anakin away from him.” Quinlan’s voice was softer than any of them were used to hearing from him. “He’s already lost Qui-Gon and now Siri. If he loses the kid, that’d just kill him.” 

“But if something happens to him and we’re discovered covering for his attachment then we’re putting ourselves at risk.” Reeft pointed out. 

The four friends looked at one another solemnly before Garen stepped up. 

“He’d do it for us,” The dark haired Jedi said with confidence. “I don’t care how much of a stick in the mud/neurotic about the rules that kriffing Gundark is, he’d risk himself for any one of us.”

They all nodded, knowing what Garen said was true. Their friend was many things, but loyal and selfless to the point of self sacrificing was probably the top of the list. 

“you know I’m in, I just wanted to make sure we're all on the same page about what we’re getting into.” Reeft said after a moment. 

“The Council already hates me,” Quinlan shrugged. “So, I’m in.” 

“Bant?” Garen turned to the Mon Calamari.

Bant stood in the center of the group in contemplation, she looked back towards the bedroom. “I have an idea, but it’s unorthodox and risky.” 

“I’d be worried if it wasn’t.” Garen mused.

“Anakin mentioned that he was excited to start a training bond with Obi-Wan, which means they haven’t created one yet.” Bant continued. “If we could help Anakin create the bond while the rest of us attempt to go in through the Force and close off the bleeding bond, which would help the pressure on his brain it should stabilize him.” 

“But, that would mean that the Padawan has control of the training bond, what’s going to keep the kid from severing it when he becomes a hormonal mess of a teenager?” Garen asked. 

Bant shook her head. “Nothing would stop him if he decides to rip the bond. We...Obi-Wan will just have to trust Anakin.” 

“I wanna help.” A small voice stated from the bedroom doorway. “I won’t hurt Master Obi-Wan, ever. I promise.” 

Bant looked at Anakin with a fond smile then back to her friends. “I don’t know of any other options, we have to trust in the Force and trust in Anakin.” 

“How are we going to guide a nine year old in forming a training bond when none of us have ever created one?” Reeft interjected and the group let out a dejected sigh. “We’re all just Padawans ourselves.”

Quinlan coughed.

“A bunch of Padawans...and Quinlan. So, you know, worthless when it comes to training bond creating.” Garen added, receiving a sarcastic thumbs up from Quinlan.

“Wait, I might have something.” Bant rushed towards the neglected reading nook and pulled out a green bantha hide bound book filled with filmsiplast pages. “Obi-Wan and I came across this while cleaning out Master Jinn’s things.” She opened it and began to read. “It was a journal he kept, it’s full of training tips. I think he meant to give it to Obi-Wan one day.” 

Anakin’s eyes went wide, he was excited that there was something left by the man who had freed him from slavery. 

“Okay, here, it looks like this has the basic instructions on forming a training bond.” Bant pointed to a page in the book and then looked back up at her friends. “Garen, Reeft you both work on this with Anakin to get him ready. Anakin,” she addressed the boy. “I need you to listen to them very carefully, this is going to be very difficult for you to attempt as a Padawan, but I know you are strong in the Force and can do it.” 

“I can do it.” The boy echoed, his confidence was almost overwhelming.

Bant looked up at Quinlan. “Vos, there are some items I’m going to need from the Halls, think you can sneak in and grab them?” 

“Bant, please, give me a challenge.” 

“Okay, I’m going to prep Obi-Wan.” She sighed. “I’d say he only has about another thirty minutes before the pressure on his brain causes permanent damage. So, we don’t have much time.” 

Everyone nodded and rushed to their various tasks.

*****

Exhausted blue/grey eyes slowly opened as consciousness returned, he felt dizzy and nauseous which given the many procedures he had endured over the years he recognized them as the lingering effects of anesthesia. His body was numb and his mouth extremely dry and every movement felt like it was in slow motion. He then became vaguely aware of a warm presence curled up beside him, he looked down to find Anakin sleeping against his side, his face buried in the crook of his arm. He groaned softly and gently wrapped his arm around the child before he took in the rest of his surroundings, he was surprised given the familiar feeling of medical treatment that he wasn’t located in the Halls of Healing but rather Qui-Gon’s now his room. 

He turned his head gently, realizing a vivid, dull ache in his skull behind his right ear, he turned his neck as far as he could and he found Bant asleep in the desk chair that had been pulled up next to his bed. He reached out in the Force and discovered Garen and Reeft’s presence out on the couch, both also asleep. His tired eyes then found their way to the foot of the bed where Quinlan Vos stood, seemingly standing guard. 

“Siri?” Obi-Wan’s voice was rough and he found the ability to speak difficult with the heavy sedative in his system. 

Quinlan’s only answer was the solemn shaking of his head and before Obi-Wan could react he found himself drifting back to sleep. 

******

She shivered as she looked around the dark hotel room - “hotel” would actually be too kind a word to describe the hole in the wall excuse for accommodations that she now found herself spending the night in. The room consisted of a sleeping cot (which Siri desperately tried not to think about what drunken acts of depravity that took place on that mattress), a desk with a rolling chair that had tears in the leather that were clearly made by knife point. Posters decorated the grungy walls of various sporting events as well as scantily clad women and were illuminated by the flickering neon sign from outside the window. 

“Charming.” She said to the small droid that had let her into the room who then left in a huff. 

She raked a hand over her face and rubbed her temples, the pain inside her head was now dull, but constant. She knew that since she had been the one to rip the bond her mind had a chance to prepare for it so the pain would be less for her. She wondered if Quinlan had made it to Obi-Wan in time, she desperately wanted to contact him, but knew that was a luxury she no longer had. 

She shivered again as her body reminded her that she was standing in soaking wet clothing, she decided it was best to take a hot shower and try to center on the mission at hand. Her life at the temple, and those she inadvertently hurt with her departure would have to wait until she returned...if she returned. 

She shivered again. 

Siri pushed her emotions down and decided the best way to tackle this mission was to take one step at a time, the last thing she needed was to catch a cold due to remaining in wet clothing so a shower was priority, followed by altering her appearance. 

Thirty minutes later Siri looked at her face in the mirror of the ‘freshner. Her blonde hair that had once cascaded in length to the middle of her back when it was worn down was now a very short undercut, with longer pieces piled on top of her head while the sides and back had been buzzed with clippers. Freeing herself from the weight of her long hair already made her feel like a new person, she couldn’t help but shake her hair around and let it fall wildly around her face. After that she used the provided hair dye grease to darken her blonde locks and eyebrows until they became an ashen red color. Her skin looked particularly pale next to the new darken hair color and her eyes seemed to glow. 

She then lined her eyes with thick black eyeliner, deciding this would be the only beauty makeup her alter ego would wear. While she knew she might have to rely on her feminine wiles to gain an advantage in a situation, that would never be her only weapon. She knew in order to be taken seriously in the underworld she would need to be feared as well as desired. 

“Something is missing…” She thought to herself out loud and then looked through the disguise supplies that were provided to her. She took out a pot of red grease makeup that was used to create fake tattoos and began to draw scars on her pale cheeks that resembled bird talons. As she looked at her reflection again she noticed the scars gave her a delicate features a ferocious and savage appearance. She responded with a wicked smile at her reflection.

She walked back into the bedroom, pulling clothing out of the bag provided by the Council. She had several choices, knowing that this bag had been put together by members of the Jedi Shadow, she decided to start with something fairly simple, she didn’t want to draw too much attention to herself at first. But, she knew she would accumulate more weapons and armor as she became more accepted in this new role. 

She slipped into a form fitting dark green unisuit (so dark that it looked black unless under bright lights). She zipped the suit all the way up to her neck, where it closed just below her chin. The unisuit was sleeveless so she decided to also wear a long black leather trench coat over it, lifting the collar up around her neck. Fingerless gloves adorned her hands, as well as a wrist gauntlet that hid a cable launcher. Her feet were buckled into thick black leather knee-high combat boots, and she attached a utility belt that hung suggestively over one hip. She placed her vibroblade as well as a small knife onto her belt, and then strapped a holster to each of her thighs, both contained a small blaster. 

Her eyes then traveled to the discarded lightsaber hilt sitting on the bed, she gingerly picked it up and let the metal cylinder roll between her hands. Her thoughts traveled back to the surface level, to the Jedi Temple, she desperately wanted to be back in her warm bed, or playing Sabbac with her friends. But, she knew such thinking would only prove to be a distraction, and she would have to put her life as a Jedi (and the people she loved) to the back of her mind. She wrapped the weapon into a piece of soft leather and placed it at the bottom of her satchel next to the private Council comlink. 

She closed her eyes and called upon the Force, listening to it’s warm assurance and realizing it was the only companion she had in this mission. Finally after several moments of meditation she flung her eyes open and her posture immediately changed as she sashayed towards the door. 

It was time for the galaxy to meet  _ Zora _ .

*****

_ The smell of stilled swamp water filled his lungs as they waited for word from the Gungans, a strange blurriness to the landscape made it difficult to see anything beyond what was in front of his nose with the exception of a tall, proud man standing in the sun, basking in the Living Force all around them.  _

_ A soft hand was suddenly placed on his shoulder, an affectionate smile of a father turned towards his direction. “You’re a good apprentice Obi-Wan, and you’re a much wiser man than I. I foresee you’ll be a great Jedi Knight.” _

_ A wry smile. “Given your lack of prophetic visions I’m not sure how much confidence that gives me Master.” _

_ A familiar tug on his Padawan braid and another soft smile. “One day Padawan-mine I hope you have an apprentice who questions your abilities as much as you do mine.”  _

_ He glances down with a chuckle and a shake of his head, ready with another easy quip as they fall into their usual teasing pattern, but as his eyes look back up he sees his Master with a gaping, burning hole in his chest, a look of pain and surprise on his face. The apprentice only has a moment to catch him and help him to the ground.  _

_ “It’s too late, too late…” _

_ “No,” the protest is immediate.  _

_ “Obi-Wan…” His trembling fingers caress the Padawan’s cheek, brushing away a tear. “Attention to the moment gives knowledge.” He struggles to breath. “Even a Jedi Knight is still a living being with the same failings.” _

\---

“Obi-Wan, can you hear me?” The sound of Bant’s voice began to cut through hazy and unsettling dreams. 

His eyelids fluttered and eventually lifted and he looked up into the exhausted and worry-worn silver eyes of his best friend. 

“Water…” his raspy voice requested.

The Mon Calamari nodded and brought a glass up to his lips, tilting it. “Easy, not too much.” 

Obi-Wan did his best to obey her orders, but as soon as the cool liquid reached his parched lips he found it difficult not to drink the entire contents of the cup. Bant stopped him however by moving the glass away from his mouth after a few gulps. She then wiped the excess water that dripped down his chin. 

“How do you feel?” She asked, and he could hear the concern in her voice.

“Garen’s 25th has nothing on this hangover.” He grumbled and Bant couldn’t help but laugh. He then looked up at her. “Wha...what happened?”

“When your bond with Siri was ruptured it caused it to bleed out just like your bond with Qui-Gon, but because you weren't fully healed from the last rupture it caused a build up of fluid which put pressure on your brain.” Bant did her best to keep her emotions out of her medical explanation. 

Obi-Wan closed his eyes at the mention of his severed bond. “Bant, It...it’s not what you think...”

She held up one of her webbed hands to keep him from explaining himself. “In order to drain the fluid I had to perform a bit of a drastic procedure. Quinlan, Reeft and I had to go into your mind through the Force and do our best to stop the hemorrhaging, I then had to use the Force to drain the fluid.” She stopped to give him a moment to process the procedure. “It was touch and go for a while. We were afraid you might not come back to us.”

“...but, I’m not in the Halls.” He looked up at her in shock. “Where’s Master Che?”

She sadly shook her head. “This procedure was off the books.” 

His eyes went wide with worry. “Bant, no...what did you do?”

“We all did what was necessary.” Her expression was stern, but her eyes were soft and full of worry. “Let’s just say you owe us one.”

Obi-Wan looked incredibly guilty, he knew the risk his friends had taken for his sake. He looked up at her. “I owe you way more than one my friend.”

“Yeah, but who’s counting?” She reached out and squeezed his hand. After a moment she continued with her recap of his treatment. “Once the physical pressure was off your brain we were able to help with the psychological effects of the severed bond. That proved a little more challenging if you can believe it.” She sighed. “Your Force presence was becoming lost in the voids created in your mind by both the damaged bonds, so we needed a new one to tether you back together and hold you in place.” 

Obi-Wan gave her a quizzical look and suddenly felt a presence inside his mind that he was not expecting. One that had just realized he was awake and was unable to hide it’s excitement. 

“Anakin created a training bond?” His mouth was agape. “How was that even possible?”

Bant moved towards the desk and picked up an old green leather book, she laid it down on Obi-Wan’s lap. “Turns out we had a little help from Master Qui-Gon.” 

He traced the binding of the book with shaky fingers, the flood of pent up emotions threatening to crest. Obi-Wan felt as if he had been selfish, and lost in his grief which he knew was a dangerous road for a Jedi to travel. He didn’t know why he had so many people who cared about him, but he refused to let their sacrifices be in vain. 

Bant saw the emotions in his eyes, she reached out to squeeze his hand again. “I have to get back to my shift in the Halls. But, Garen has been making sure Anakin gets to class and they both will be back later. But, he said if you need anything to just com him.” She smiled and rose to her feet. 

“I can’t thank you enough Bant, though I’m not sure I’m worth all this trouble.” His eyes were focused on the book sitting in his lap, he couldn’t look at her. “You all took too big of a risk.”

“Is that what you truly think? That you aren’t worth it?” She didn’t know whether to hug him or smack him. “You would do the same for any of us.” 

“Of course I would,” he answered without hesitation.

Bant sighed, she above all had seen the evolution of Obi-Wan’s insecurities and lack of self worth over the years. “I really wish you wouldn’t talk about my friend like that.”

His eyes finally met hers and he sadly nodded. “I will endeavor to try not to.” 

“Do or do not…”

“Sure, throw that in my face.” The corners of his mouth turned up into a mischievous smirk. “I think this more than proves you’re ready for the trials.”

“Too bad this doesn’t count as my trials because I can’t imagine anything being more difficult.” Bant admitted, trying to keep her voice even.

Obi-Wan gripped her hand. “What would I do without you?”

Bant shrugged. “All of you would be dead in a ditch somewhere no doubt.” 

“That is probably the truest statement I’ve ever heard.” He stated and leaned back against his pillow, weariness taking over. 

“Now, you are to remain in bed for three days, and then light duty for another seven. I will make sure it’s documented in your file that you have been diagnosed with the flu and must rest.” She eyed him carefully. “Given the circumstances I fully expect you to actually comply with your recovery orders this time, because it’s not just you on the line if you end up in the Halls because you pushed yourself too fast.”

Obi-Wan rolled over, tucking the blanket over his head. “I have no idea what you’re insinuating.” 

“Mmm-hmmm.” Bant smirked and headed towards the door. She stopped and looked back at him. “Get some rest. I’ll be back to check on the broken bond the morning," She sighed. "We are not as powerful as Master Che and Master Yoda so it might just be a temporary fix and I'm afraid despite our efforts you might need to have it looked at by a Mind Healer...I'm sorry."

Obi-Wan peeked out from beneath the blanket. “Bant, I…” He really wasn’t sure what to say at that moment. “No, I am sorry... for everything.” 

“Obi, I’m just glad you’re okay.” She sighed. “The rest of it, well that’s between you and the Force.”

As he was left alone with his thoughts and the aching pain inside his skull he turned towards the window in his bedroom and noticed it was still raining. He wondered how he had let himself get to this point - he was tired of his insecurities and grief dictating his life. He realized something needed to change, he couldn’t continue to be a burden on his friends. He made a promise to himself, and to the Force that he would always be the Jedi and friend they needed. He realized in that moment that it was up to him not to let any of these people down ever again (if he could help it). 

He took a deep breath.  _ ‘There is no emotion, there is peace…’ _

But the usual calming effect of those familiar words did not bring him the peace he craved. He sighed and tried to find another way to calm his restless thoughts and emotions.

He closed his eyes and reached out to his new training bond, unable to stop the smile coming to his lips when he felt the surprise and unabashed affection on the other end. He knew first things first he had a Padawan to focus on, he was a Jedi Knight now and it was time he started acting like one. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind he wondered where Siri was, he knew realistically he should let her go, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do that...not when there was hope in saving her. She was there when he needed her, how could he abandon her now?

That gave him two things to focus on instead of his grief - training Anakin and finding Siri. 

He felt content with his new resolve as he drifted back to sleep.

*****

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: Okay, so I edited the original medical procedure because it just didn't sit well with me because it was just too unrealistic. Hopefully this makes much more sense and is a bit more plausible than Bant basically performing surgery. Thanks guys!! 
> 
> Everything Qui-Gon is saying in the dreams are quotes from various Jedi Apprentice books. The dreams will come more into play during the next chapter.
> 
> Any comments/kudos are incredibly welcome, I really love to hear what you guys think!!


	8. Chapter 8 - Nurse Reeft

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan comes to terms with a lot of stuff

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: I can’t believe this is technically the last chapter (besides an epilogue) to this story! The amount of attention and love that this story has received has been overwhelming and I am truly thankful for all the kind words. 
> 
> Hopefully the ending meets your expectations! I’ll have a longer note at the end of the chapter, but for now - enjoy! 

**Chapter 8 - Nurse Reeft**

*****

_ The black boot connected hard causing a moment of confusion along with pain, footing was then lost and he found himself falling from a great height. The Force guided him to the platform below with a bone crunching thud against his left shoulder - giving him only seconds to react and grip the edge of the catwalk.  _

_ ‘Hone your focus. Add speed, timing, strategy, surprise. Do not forget the Force is with you.’  _

_ His Master’s words rang in his ear...his Master - he’s left his Master alone with the monster!  _

_ New resolve is felt, pushing the pain down as he pulls himself up. Eyes scan frantically to the platform above, two figures locked in battle.  _

_ //Master wait, I’m coming!// _

_ No answer, realization now that the Sith is dictating the battleground, leading his Master to a narrow hallway. The Force surrounds him now for a huge jump, already exhausted limbs brace for the graceful landing, but the jump means there is little Force energy to assist in running - he has to be fast enough on his own.  _

_ He’s not fast enough.  _

_ His Master is kneeling, meditating - of course he is, he is living in the moment as a Jedi should. Eyes move from his beloved Master to look into the depths of yellow and red orbs as the Sith paces his confinement like a caged animal. The familiar feeling of fear and doubt collect in the bottom of his stomach.  _

_ //Do not meet hate with hate. Meet it with purpose.// _

_ He hears his Master’s voice through their bond for the last time as the red ray shields drop and the sound of lightsabers clashing echoes through the room. The shields cycle through again, he is trapped behind a wall of red. _

_ //Please Master, hang on...//  _

_ “If you don’t know which way to turn, review what you know.” His Master’s voice is loud above the noise of the battle.  _

_ A breath catches as a slip is made in defense, nothing can be done as red plasma enters soft flesh.  _

_ “NOOOOOOOO!”  _

\---

“Nooooo!” A voice echoes as he awakes from the dream, it takes a moment to realize it isn’t his voice. 

Obi-Wan untangles himself from his blankets and rushes to his Padawan’s room. He notices Reeft already there, attempting to wake his young charge from a fitful slumber. Obi-Wan in one swift move is already gathering his apprentice into his arms as he sits on the edge of the bed. 

“Anakin, Padawan wake up, it’s only a dream.” He softly coaxes but receives no response. 

He looks up at Reeft who shrugs, unsure what to do in the situation. Obi-Wan can feel the sweat soaking his apprentice’s sleep clothes as he rubs circles along Anakin’s spine, attempting to send calming waves through the Force. He then remembers their training bond and attempts to reach the child there. 

_ //Anakin, you’re safe...I’ve got you.// _

_ //Master Obi-Wan? No, stay away, he’ll get you!// The young voice rasphed  _

_ //Who Padawan, who will get me?// _

_ //The Sith! He’s coming for you!// _

Obi-Wan hugged Anakin tighter as the boy’s limbs flailed against his body. He wanted to tell the boy that there was no chance the Sith could come back for him, but in the throws of a vivid dream he knew that wouldn’t convince the boy. He decided to try a different course of action. 

_ //Then we’ll take him together Padawan, but I need you to wake up because I can’t fight him alone.//  _

_ //Together?// _

_ //Yes Padawan-mine, promise me that we’ll always take the Sith on together...don’t you dare leave me behind.// _

Obi-Wan found himself startled by the intensity of his emotions behind his plea to Anakin, realizing his pent up frustration that Qui-Gon had left him behind to face the dangerous Sith on his own. He reached up and ran his hands through Anakin’s hair as he held the boy tighter, taking a deep breath and releasing his own anger at Qui-Gon’s actions into the Force. 

After another moment two innocent albeit tired blue eyes looked up into his. 

“Master, you’re awake!” The boy exclaimed and wrapped his arms around the older Jedi’s neck in a tight hug. 

Obi-Wan was almost caught off guard by the intensity he felt through the Force as Anakin’s presence was fully awake now. He took a beat to steady himself and then patted the boy on the back.

“I am Anakin, thanks to you.” 

The round face moved so he could get a good look at his Master. “And Bant, and Garen, and Reeft...even Quinlan, they all helped.” 

Obi-Wan’s eyes glanced up at his friend who was doing his best to excuse himself from the private moment. “Yes, thanks to all of you. I’m not sure how I’ll even begin repaying all of you.” 

Anakin tilted his head in mild confusion. “Mum always said ‘what’s the point in having family if they don’t help each other’?” 

Deep down he knew this was a training moment, where he should be the Jedi Master and remind his apprentice that this thinking borderline attachment, but in that moment Obi-Wan felt his throat constrict which was a feeling that had become far too familiar for his liking over the course of two weeks, however this time it didn’t have the associated feelings of grief or guilt. He realized that Anakin was speaking the truth - the risks and gestures his friends had taken since his return from Naboo were out of love, and only a family would love so unconditionally. 

Obi-Wan shifted so he was leaning against the headboard, bringing Anakin to lay down next to him. Anakin laid his head down on his Master’s chest, listening to the steady heartbeat. Reeft decided it was time for him to leave, realizing for the first time in weeks that he knew his friend would be okay. He reached out to squeeze Obi-Wan’s shoulder as he left the room as was greeted by a silent “thank you”. 

Once alone Obi-Wan took a moment to look around the room, realizing Anakin had already made it his own. What was once an organized space with minimal personal effects suddenly looked like a droid workshop with clothing strewn about and a sunlamp in the corner which was currently dimmed. 

Obi-Wan realized he was once again going to be the one picking up after his teammate, but somehow that felt familiar and he hoped would help steady him as he transitioned from one partner to another. 

As he sat back, listening to Anakin’s soft breathing he looked around the room for a familiar object. 

“Anakin, where’s Spikes?” 

One sleepy eye opened at the sound of his Master’s question. “Hmmm, oh, he’s with you...to help you sleep...for your bad dreams.”

Instinctively Obi-Wan denied his own nightmares. “Jedi don’t have nightmares, Anakin.” 

“Oh, so when I’m a Jedi I won’t have bad dreams anymore?” The young voice sounded hopeful. 

Obi-Wan sighed. “I’m sorry Anakin I was trying to say what I think I should say as a teacher, not what I know is true for me as a Jedi.” He found himself playing with Anakin’s stubby Padawan braid as he spoke. “A Jedi can have nightmares, but it’s our job to try to learn what we can from them and then release them into the Force.” 

“Like emotions?”

“That’s right,” a small smile crept to his lips. “You know what Master Qui-Gon used to tell me about dreams?”

Anakin shook his head, excited to hear wisdom from Qui-Gon Jinn. 

“Jedi are taught to value dreams, but not to trust them. Dreams can confuse as well as illuminate. A Jedi should test a dream much as he tests unstable ground. Only when he’s sure of his footing should he move on. Dreams can be random energy, nothing more. Some Jedi see things in dreams, and others do not.” Obi-Wan felt a single tear escape his eyes as he could hear his deceased Master’s voice in his head. 

“Siri said you can teach me to know what’s a vision and what’s just a dream…how do you know that difference?”

Obi-Wan felt a sharp pain in his head at the mention of Siri, but he quickly shielded it from Anakin. “It takes time and training Anakin, but you’ll get there.”

“...and meditation?” He grumbled.

“Yes, meditation does help.” Obi-Wan couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at Anakin’s aversion to sitting still. “But, there are other methods, exercises.” He felt Anakin begin to drift back to sleep, complete with a loud yawn. Obi-Wan smiled. “But, all that will have to wait until Bant says I’m well enough for full duties. For now, if you have a nightmare I need you to not hide it from me...okay?”

“Okay Master Obi-Wan.”

The older Jedi shifted in order to lay Anakin back down to the bed, he placed his hand on the boy’s head and sent a Force sleep suggestion to his young charge and tucked the blankets around the small body. “I’ll go get Spikes for you.” He carefully rose from the bed and headed towards the door. 

“No, he likes your room better.” Anakin said as he pulled the covers over his shoulders. “Says I’m too messy.” 

Obi-Wan couldn’t help the raised eyebrow, considering the dolls apparent dislike for soap he found Anakin’s story a bit far fetched and not well thought out. But, he smiled at his apprentice’s thoughtfulness. “Okay, then Spikes can stay with me, but if you need him I know he’ll be happy to come back.” 

He turned to leave as he sensed the nine year old slip back to sleep through their bond. As he glanced back at the boy a gentle yet stern feeling through the Force caused Obi-Wan to realize that his desire to train Anakin no longer felt like an obligation, in those quiet moments of bonding he found himself truly wanting to guide this boy - HIS Padawan to Knighthood and beyond. In that moment it felt as if a weight had been suddenly removed from his shoulders and his path felt less uncertain. 

His body however was still recovering from two severed mental bonds and he nearly collapsed as Anakin’s door shut. Reeft was there just in time to catch him. 

“Okay, you’re still on bed rest my friend.” Reeft draped Obi-Wan’s arm over his shoulder and guided him back to his bedroom. “I don’t need you relapsing on my watch.” 

“Thank you nurse Reeft.” He couldn’t help the quip. 

“Oh I’m so glad to see that your special brand of humor wasn’t lost when we were inside your mind.” Reeft rolled his eyes as he helped Obi-Wan to his bed. 

Obi-Wan gripped the Dressellian’s forearm as the blankets were adjusted around his chest. “Reeft, how long has she been gone?”

His friend hesitated, his frustration with this conversation evident. “Three days.” 

“Who’s on the team looking for her?” Obi-Wan’s exhausted eyes peering into his. 

“Looking for her? Why would anyone be looking for her?” Reeft huffed. “She’s the one who left, she’s the one who denounced the Jedi...she’s the one who hurt you.” 

“She overreacted obviously, but she was renounced - in front of everyone.” Obi-Wan’s heart broke, remembering the scene outside the archives. “How could the Council...her friends just abandon her?” 

“She made her choice Obi,”

The pain inside his head began pounding behind his right ear again, becoming unbearable. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to keep the room from spinning. Reeft seemed to notice this and picked up a bottle of pills from the night stand. 

“Here, Bant said these will help with the pain.” He offered them to Obi-Wan with a glass of water and the human Jedi accepted them gratefully. 

“I’m...I’m sorry Reeft,” he finished taking the pills and looked up at his friend. “I know how this must look given...well, given everything.” He laid his head back down on the pillows. “It’s just...she’s alone out there, Reeft.” 

“She has the Force.” Reeft sighed, not sure what to say.

“You’re right.” Obi-Wan finally admitted. 

“What is this really about Obi-Wan?” Reeft asked, tentatively. He hoped he wasn’t crossing a line.

“It could’ve been me,” The exhausted Jedi stated. “Had Qui-Gon not…” he took a quick breath to steady himself. “If Qui-Gon had lived, he would’ve renounced me and would the Order have turned their backs on me too?”

“You wouldn’t have left,”

“You sure about that? I’ve left before...” Obi-Wan closed his eyes again as the pain hit him. “From a certain point of view Siri and I both lost our Masters, why am I granted compassion and she abandonment?” 

“You took the loss of your Master and made a promise to guide another Force sensitive child to the ways of the Jedi, SHE turned her back on the Jedi - leaving you to die might I remind you… and from what I’ve heard has now fallen in with Pirates.” Reeft stated sadly. “It’s two very different circumstances. 

His eyes snapped open. “Pirates, what...no, you can’t be serious.” 

“It’s the intel Quinlan has heard.” 

“So, someone was looking for her.” Obi-Wan felt hopeful. 

“Before he left for Tattooine Quinlan tried to find her.” Reeft admitted. “We didn’t want to get your hopes up.” 

It felt like a slap in the face, but Obi-Wan sadly understood why he had been kept from the information. He hadn’t exactly been acting like a Jedi with regards to his attachments over the course of the last few weeks. He had needlessly put his friends in a precarious position, and knew they had his best interests in mind when they decided to keep this information from him. After a moment he slowly nodded. 

“I should get some rest…” His voice was soft as he pulled the covers over his shoulders.

“Yeah, I’ll be in the next room until Garen gets here at 0700 if you need me.” 

Obi-Wan nodded, he knew it would be fruitless to try and convince his friends that they didn’t need to watch over him like an invalid. He knew he couldn’t risk relapsing, no, he’d have to be patient and focus on the moment. 

_ ‘Don’t center on your anxieties Obi-Wan…Activity can endanger. To wait and to watch is the more difficult task, yet it is one we must master.’ _ The memory of the melodic baritone voice filtered through his head.

_ ‘Yes Master.’ _

Reeft watched for a moment to make sure his friend was okay, he let out a sigh of relief when he sensed Obi-Wan fall asleep.

*****

*2 Weeks Later*

It was exactly one month ago that his life had changed. Exactly one month ago he held his dying Master in his arms and made a daunting promise. One month since he felt his Master’s Force presence and gentle caress on his cheek, one month since he had killed out of anger. Though he wore the same boots he had stepped onto Naboo a Padawan and left as a Knight, nothing in his training had prepared him for that fateful day one month ago. 

But he was healing, in the last two weeks he found it easier to say his Master’s name and to tell the story of his duel with the Sith. He found himself calling the bedroom his instead of Qui-Gon’s, and he was beginning to enjoy the role of mentor. It would take time to release all of his emotions surrounding that day in Theed, and truth be told he may never be fully able to let go of that day, but he was learning to live with it. 

He was physically healing as well, Bant had granted him active duty status after a week - her procedure had worked wonders, despite her insecurities regarding her abilities to heal him. There had not been a relapse and while there would be scars there didn’t seem to be any lasting physical damage to his mind. It was no surprise to Obi-Wan that Bant was nominated for her trials shortly thereafter, it was as if taking the lead on healing him had opened her up within the Force and she was quickly becoming as competent a healer as any of the Masters in the Halls. Obi-Wan was secretly planning a celebratory dinner in her honor.

The month had proved to be bittersweet for Anakin and tested Obi-Wan’s patience. Once the initial excitement of joining the Jedi order had dwindled a fog of homesickness had soured the boy’s mood, and much to Obi-Wan’s chagrin he had sent his Padawan to his room to meditate (Anakin’s most hated punishment) on more than one occasion. Likewise, he had a door slammed in his face more than once by the child - and after a very tense argument was told he should’ve been the one to die instead of Qui-Gon. That particular day Obi-Wan found himself taking his frustrations out on training probes in the salle until he was about to collapse. 

But, there were good days too, Obi-Wan had to remind himself. More good days than bad with Anakin. The Jedi Knight was incredibly surprised how quickly Anakin soaked up knowledge; a month ago the boy couldn’t read or write and now he was almost caught up to the children his age. He was always eager to learn lightsaber techniques from both Master Drallig as well as from Obi-Wan himself and was almost ready to go to Ilum to find a crystal and construct his own lightsaber. And the boy loved hugs Obi-Wan had learned over the course of their first month. So unlike Obi-Wan the child from Tatooine craved affection and touch, and it was something Obi-Wan had to consciously remember whenever the child wrapped his arms around his unsuspecting Master’s waist. He knew in the back of his mind that Anakin would grow out of this need for physical contact so he decided to let it go and try to offer moments of connection whenever it was appropriate while reminding Anakin of the times it wasn’t appropriate. 

They worked together on developing their training bond, Obi-Wan knew it was unconventional for the Padawan to have created the bond (not unconventional, more like unheard of), but for some reason it felt right for their partnership. Anakin was the brighter star of their Force signatures - one that threatened to be a supernova if not contained. Obi-Wan’s presence acted as a magnetic field that was created to control the power of the nova - even Yoda one day remarked that the boy felt less dangerous in the Force since being bonded with Obi-Wan. It was truly a special connection, that much was certain and Obi-Wan wondered (and even in private moments feared) what would happen should Anakin ever decide to sever it. He knew he’d have to trust in the Force and in his Apprentice. 

Obi-Wan had even picked up a few solo missions, none that took him away from Anakin for too long (who enjoyed spending time with his new pilot buddy Garen while Obi-Wan was away). It had felt strange and even wrong to be sent on missions without Qui-Gon, which he admonished himself for those feelings because he had been sent on solo missions as a senior Padawan many times, but it was the stone in the pit of his stomach to know he wouldn’t have a cup of tea and Qui-Gon’s curiosity waiting for him when he got home. But, the missions were a good distraction from his lingering thoughts and grief so he was thankful for them. Things were finally beginning to feel normal, or at least began to form a new normal. 

But today was exactly one month since Qui-Gon’s passing, since the Sith, since the promise. Obi-Wan knew today would be tough, and suspected his friends had a plan to help him get through it. A pain rose in his heart as he briefly wondered what role Siri would’ve played on this day, she probably would’ve kicked his ass in a duel he realized with a smirk. 

He hadn’t told his friends, nor the Council that his solo missions had been taking longer than necessary because once done with the mission he was following leads, trying to track down Siri. No matter how he tried he couldn’t get rid of the gnawing feeling that she was in trouble, that she was alone and that she needed the Jedi. He couldn’t give up on her, just like he knew had the roles been reversed she’d never give up on him. 

Obi-Wan came out of his room and heard a commotion in his kitchen, he followed the sounds and found Anakin steeping a cup of tea. The aroma hit him like a punch to the gut and he realized that his Padawan was preparing a cup of Qui-Gon’s favorite tea, the flavor that Siri had suggested he make whenever he was sick (or sad). 

Today was going to be really difficult, Obi-Wan realized. 

“Good morning Master!” The boy’s smile was infectious. 

He returned the smile. “Good morning my young apprentice, I’m surprised to see you up so early.” 

Anakin handed Obi-Wan the tea in his favorite mug with a sheepish look on his face. “Oh, well, I just thought you might want some tea.” 

He didn’t mention that he had tea every morning, instead took a sip with a grateful nod. As soon as the familiar blend hit his tongue he felt strong palms resting against his fevered forehead and gently caressing his hair. Remembered late night conversations and debates about the Cosmic VS. Living Force. There was nothing but comfort inside this mug and he took a deep breath to savor the smell and the memories. 

“Did you want to meditate with me Master?” Anakin’s voice broke him out of his spell, his question almost causing Obi-Wan to choke. 

He was shocked that the boy who hated meditating would offer the activity out of selflessness. He was once again in awe of the heart that existed within such a small frame. 

“I...oh Anakin, you know nothing would delight me more, but today doesn’t need to be all about me.” He placed the mug on the counter and knelt in front of the boy. “How about instead of doing what I’d want to do today we do what Master Qui-Gon would want to do?” 

Anakin’s eyes went wide. “You mean it?” 

“Absolutely, let’s both take today off.” He placed a hand on Anakin’s shoulder. “Qui-Gon always used to say  _ ‘Even in the middle of a mission, don’t neglect to taste the pastries.’ _

Anakin made a face at this. “What does that mean?” 

“It was my Master’s way of cryptically telling me not to forget to enjoy the moment.” Obi-Wan chuckled. “I say we honor him today by living and enjoying ourselves.” 

Anakin fell into Obi-Wan’s arms and the older Jedi could sense the affection and sorrow through their bond. Qui-Gon Jinn would always be a folk hero to Anakin, he was the man who had freed him from slavery and brought him to the Jedi. He was the man who died for Padme (whom Obi-Wan realized the boy thought about constantly). He was also the man who had trained his own Master whom Anakin placed on a pedestal. In the short amount of time they had spent together Qui-Gon became a father figure to Anakin, and Obi-Wan was his big brother. 

And the two brothers together mourned the loss of their father, but took solace that they had each other. 

“Go, get dressed...we’re going to the zoo.” Obi-Wan released Anakin from the hug after a moment. “And then I’m taking you for the best Nerf burger on the planet.”

“Yippie!” Anakin cheered as he dashed to his room, knocking over a pile of droid parts just inside his door. 

Obi-Wan grimaced at the sound of clattering metal and then chuckled as he took a sip of the tea. “That boy is going to be the death of me and it’s all your fault Qui-Gon.”

*****

She pushed down her fears as she stood in the alleyway in the busy Coco District. She had not expected that her mission would bring her back to Coruscant (at least not so soon). There was a small part of her that feared the Jedi were looking for her, though she had to trust the Council would deter any official searches, but it was the unofficial searches that had her concerned. 

She didn’t know if she’d be ready to face anyone who knew her as Siri Tachi, but she knew that she had little choice and had to trust her instincts. Luckily so far no one had even looked twice at her, and she was doing her part to hide her Force signature being so close to the temple. 

The tracking fob in her hand beeped and she motioned it towards the crowd, searching for her mark. She had been sent on an assasination assignment by her current Pirate crew leader, Hudso Shaku whom she had learned had connections to Krayn. She knew it was her chance to make a name for herself in the underworld and hope to catch the Pirate Slaver’s eye. 

If she could assassinate someone in the vicinity of the Jedi Temple without being caught then it would be assumed that there was little else she couldn’t do.

She had been teamed up with another pirate who was also eager to make a name for himself, but he was not as subtle as she would’ve liked and that annoyed her to no end. She glanced up at the young Weequay pirate and placed a finger to her lips in hopes he’d take the hint to stay quiet.

“Ah, Zora my dear you blend in better if you mingle with the crowd. Sneaking around like this makes you look like you’re up to no good.” Hondo Ohnaka slapped her on the shoulder.

She sighed, realizing he had a point. “Fine, the fob says he’s in that apartment building.” She pointed to the tall building across the street. 

“Not his apartment, tisk, tisk...a mistress perhaps.” Hondo was practically giggling and Zora rolled her eyes. 

“I don’t give a bantha shivat where he wants to stick his manhood, but that doesn’t mean I won’t enjoy cutting it off and mounting it on my wall as a trophy.” Zora smirked. 

Hondo got very quiet and sullen. “Remind me never to get on your bad side Zora.” 

She looked at him over her shoulder and winked. “Hey Hondo, don’t ever get on my bad side.”

They waited for another moment and Zora placed the fob back on her belt. “You take the front entrance, I’ll take the back.” 

She watched as Hondo sauntered his way across the street, tipping his hat towards a group of Twi’lek women. Siri made her way towards the back of the building a moment later, walking calmly to ensure she wasn’t drawing attention to herself. As she drew closer to the back entrance a familiar smell assaulted her nostrils and made her stomach growl. 

_ ‘Dex’s Diner.’ _ The realization hit her like a ton of bricks and she couldn’t stop herself from glancing across the street at the small restaurant. 

It was then that she noticed a familiar group sitting together in one of the booths next to the window. Her heart thudded loudly in her chest as she stared at her friends laughing and enjoying the evening together. She saw young Anakin taking enthusiastic bites of his burger, talking with his mouthful in Garen’s direction. She also saw the group raise their glasses towards Bant who’s cheeks seemed to turn more pink at the attention. 

And then her gaze turned to Obi-Wan who was not only alive, but was actually smiling. 

It took all of her Jedi training not to rush towards them, to remember to stay in the moment and focus on her mission. The mission to assassinate a Senate Aide next door to where her Jedi friends were eating. 

She also knew the smart assassin knew it best to choose the appropriate time to strike. And this was not it. 

“Hondo,” she called over her ear comlink. “Abort the mission, there are Jedi in the vicinity. We’ll have to regroup and come up with another plan.” 

She lingered to watch her friends for a moment longer, saving the image of their happiness to her memory for darker times. Then a familiar set of blue/grey eyes snapped in her direction and she and Obi-Wan were both frozen looking at one another. 

\---

Obi-Wan noticed a strange figure across the street, a woman with dark red hair dressed in black leather. He wouldn’t give her another glance, but the Force was insisting he look closer. He suddenly rose from the booth, stepping over Garen and Quinlan who weren’t happy. 

He ignored their protests and ran towards the door of the diner and out into the street. But, the woman was gone before he made it outside. 

He closed his eyes and called upon the Force, his heart thumping inside his chest. He then felt the familiar presence of Quinlan Vos next to him. 

“I saw her,” Obi-Wan dared to breath. “I saw Siri.”

Quinlan sighed. “She’s gone man, you gotta let her go.” 

“It was her...I am sure of it.” Obi-Wan insisted, his eyes scanning the crowd. “She’s still on Coruscant.” 

“No, it wasn’t her.” Quinlan’s tone was firm. “Obi-Wan listen to me, she’s not coming back.” 

“I can’t leave her,” his voice was almost pleading. 

“Kriff, Obi-Wan, you’ll be expelled if you keep this up.” Quinlan urged. 

Obi-Wan shook his head. “It’s not about that Quin, we can’t just abandon her. Now, we actually have a chance to find her, let’s go!”

Quinlan took Obi-Wan by the shoulders to stop him. “I’ve already tracked her down Obi-Wan.”

“What?” He looked up at his friend with a look of shock and anger. “And you just left her out there?”

“She’s gone man...she...she fell.” Quinlan lowered his gaze. 

“You’re wrong, the Siri I know…”

“She’s not the Siri you know, not anymore!” He shouted, causing onlookers to turn their heads. “She has turned to the dark side Obi-Wan. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you can’t keep looking for her.” 

He felt his knees buckle, but Quinlan held him up. “I...I can’t leave her.” 

“You have to, you’re a Jedi.” 

“I want to see your report Quin, I need to know what she’s done.” Obi-Wan stated beneath his breath. 

“Don’t punish yourself Obi, no good will come of it.” Vos said, putting his improv skills to good use. 

Obi-Wan kept his gaze to the spot he had seen the woman. “I need to know, I need to know there isn’t hope...that she’s gone. Otherwise I can’t stop looking for her.” 

Quinlan sighed and nodded. “Okay man, I’ll get the reports.” He then wrapped an arm around Obi-Wan’s shoulders. “But for now, let’s do Qui-Gon proud and focus on the here and now, let’s get back to dinner. We’ll cross the rest of it as it comes.”

Obi-Wan finally dragged his eyes from the spot in the street and glanced back at the diner, he noticed the concerned look on his friend’s faces. He nodded to Quinlan. 

“You’re right, we’ll cross the rest of it as it comes.” He sighed. “I’m ready.”

*****

To Be Concluded

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: When re-reading Jedi Quest Path to Truth (which is the story where Obi-Wan discovers Siri’s undercover mission) I was struck by a simple line that had such heartbreaking implications: “Obi-Wan had tried to find her,” - I just couldn’t get the image out of my head of Obi-Wan refusing to give up on her until he learns that she joined a Slaver’s crew which then there was this line: “Siri had battled her dark side and lost.” - which in his mind means she is truly gone and he feels betrayed…*sobs* damn, this storyline is just so crazy tragic when you stop and think about it, I just had to include it in my angsty story (because Qui-Gon’s death wasn’t enough emotional pain for Obi I guess). 
> 
> All of the quotes from Qui-Gon are from the Jedi Apprentice books. 
> 
> I also wanted to set up some conflict between Obi-Wan and Quinlan since they aren't on the best of terms in TCW...hope it came through okay.
> 
> Thank you again for reading!! I do have an epilogue planned for this story so we get a chance to see how it all works out. As always I appreciate any comments you have!


	9. Chapter 9 - Four Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loose ends are tied up  
> Deceptions are discovered  
> Reunions are had

**Chapter 9: Four Years Later**

Obi-Wan sat in the lavish sleeping quarters on the Senate transport, his eyes focused on the blurry lines of stars outside the porthole window as they continued their trek through hyperspace from Nar Shaddaa to Coruscant. His hand rested on his chin, absently stroking his beard as he tried to make sense of the last few days. No matter how talented a Jedi is at releasing their feelings into the Force there are just some missions that will always carry a heavy toll. Not since Naboo had Obi-Wan felt the weight of his own personal feelings after a mission so heavily.

It started with an emotionally exhausting visit to Ilum so Anakin could finally acquire his official Kyber Crystal and build his lightsaber. It had taken much longer for the Council to accept that Anakin was ready to handle the responsibilities of a full powered lightsaber, not because of a lack of talent in wielding the blade but more out of a lack of restraint in using it. 

_ ‘Kriffing Ilum…’ _ Obi-Wan sighed as his thoughts lingered on their trip to the snowy Kyber caves. 

He had seen Qui-Gon in the cave while he waited for his apprentice to find his crystal, or rather he had been forced to see a repeated vision of his former Master’s death as if it were a holovid stuck on a loop. Ilum was notorious for causing Jedi to face their worst fears, it was a test and in the back of his mind he realized that it was a reminder for him to learn to let go of his attachments. 

But instead it brought back the nightmares and the heavy feelings of grief that he had long thought he had dealt with thanks to the help of meditation, and a few sessions with a Mind Healer (at Bant’s insistence). It had even seemed to cure his sleepwalking, thank the Force. But now they were back with a vengeance and he knew he’d have to deal with them at some point.

Anakin’s visions of the Sith seemed to have also returned, to the point that the boy had manipulated a training droid to take on the form of the Zabrak so he could defeat it. Mace Windu and Chancellor Palpatine had been there to witness him besting the droid version of the Sith Apprentice, claiming that he wanted to show he was as good a swordsman as his Master, but Obi-Wan knew the truth. The boy was convinced that Maul had somehow survived, and he was preparing himself for an inevitable altercation with the terrifying horned creature. 

Obi-Wan was always quick to point out to Anakin that in his dreams it was always only Obi-Wan who seemed to face Darth Maul, trying to remind Anakin of their pact to always face the Sith together. That alone had been the trick to get the child to calm down and back to sleep four years ago, but it seemed to be harder and harder to convince a teenager of anything. The twenty nine year old realized he might need to get Yoda involved if Anakin’s visions became worse as he grew older.

Things had been going great for the Master/Padawan team, okay maybe  _ great _ was a little optimistic, but things were going well enough as far as Obi-Wan was concerned. He had even started to figure out ways to handle Anakin’s growing mood swings, discovering that the phrase  _ “you seem a little on edge”  _ was somehow the trick to getting the boy to open up and talk. Sure, Anakin didn’t seem to have very many friends his own age, but Obi-Wan’s own friends had grown close to Anakin over the last four years so it wasn’t as if the boy was alone. 

Things were good, Obi-Wan had told himself. That was until Anakin ran a mysterious errand with the Chancellor and suddenly said he was contemplating leaving the Jedi, followed by a mission that seemed to put the young inhabitants of a devastated planet against the older generation in a never ending war - which Hit way too close to old memories of Melia/Daan for Obi-Wan’s comfort. Insecurities of his place within the Jedi, his sudden knighthood without the official trials, his inexperience with Anakin during those first few months all came to a head during that mission. It was as if his past was coming back to haunt him, and he didn’t know exactly how to react. 

And then to top it all off he then met Zora.

_ /The Pirate had landed just a few feet from Anakin and kept their blasters level, but did not shoot again. Obi-Wan’s breath caught in his throat as he took in the features of the fearsome adversary, something in the Force told him to look closer than just at the outward appearance. They had short, dark red hair that was braided and adorned with glittering, sharp objects making it stick out wildly. They wore a tunic and leggings made of various animal hides that clung close to their body, and also wore strategically placed armor that covered their shoulders and chest. They had frightening red scars on their cheeks, causing the symmetrical face to look off balanced and ferocious. They had drawn thick black eyeliner around their eyelids which enhanced the Pirate’s eyes...those crystal blue and familiar eyes.  _

_ Siri, the Pirate was Siri...or rather Zora as the Council had told him right before he and Anakin had left for their mission.  _

_ They had told him that Siri had joined Kryan’s crew over two years ago and rose the ranks to become his second in command (a title she shared with a vicious Wookie named Rashtah). It was clear she had fully succumbed to her dark side, as Quinlan had shown him years prior. He hadn’t wanted to believe it, even after seeing the report from Quinlan, he even secretly continued to search for her for months, but as the Council went on to describe her rise to power in the Krayn’s crew Obi-Wan felt the pain of her loss as vividly as the day she left him on the roof with a bleeding mental bond.  _

_ And here she was, standing between him and his Padawan with blasters pointed at each of them. And he had so much he wanted to say to her, but his brain couldn’t seem to process a coherent thought.  _

_ “You will not shoot him Siri,” he managed to say finally. _

_ “I am Siri no longer,” her voice was deeper than he remembered, and a different cadence. “I am Zora.” _

_ “There is still Jedi in you,” he felt as if he was speaking faster than his brain was processing everything. “Even though you have betrayed EVERY part of our code.” His tone was ice cold. _

_ Okay, that was probably not the right thing to say given their history and the precarious situation, but it had left his mouth before he could stop himself.  _

_ Her expression was stoic, if what he said had hurt her it was not apparent. She stood her ground between Anakin and himself.  _

_ “There are so many things I do not miss about the Jedi…” she began, her voice held none of her old spirit or kindness. “One is their self-righteousness.” She sneered, giving a poignant look in Obi-Wan’s direction. “It’s so...boring.”  _

_ Obi-Wan suddenly wondered if there was anything she DID miss about the Jedi. _

_ His heart began to crumble as he saw the absolute hatred on her face, though thinking back her eyes had looked remorseful, and perhaps even held a bit of longing? Everything after she spoke happened so quickly and Obi-Wan had to struggle to save himself as Siri...no, Zora pushed him inside the transport and turned on the turbines which shot him out into space. Leaving Anakin alone with a notorious slaver and what he thought was a fallen Jedi./ _

Bringing his mind back to the current moment Obi-Wan groaned as he laid down on the sleep couch pinching the bridge of his nose. He had spoken so bitterly to Siri on that ship, he had wanted to hurt her he realized. He had felt so betrayed at the idea that she would throw away the life they had sacrificed their own relationship for without a second thought. He had come to the realization that he was not behaving as a Jedi, he was allowing personal feelings get in the way and it came at the cost of his Padawan’s safety. He wondered (not for the first time) if he had made the right choice in honoring his last promise to Qui-Gon, wondered if he was really up to the task to train Anakin.

Even now that Anakin was safe and Siri’s mission was at an end which meant she was coming home, he found that he still felt anger and betrayal over the entire ordeal. But he wasn’t sure who to direct his indignation towards. 

The Council was an obvious choice, after all they had been the ones to send a twenty three year old who had barely been knighted on a dangerous deep undercover mission long term. And they also had come up with the cover story which caused her Jedi peers to believe she had fallen to the dark side, possibly damaging her reputation. But due to his gift with the Unifying Force Obi-Wan had always been good at seeing the bigger picture, his mind was able to understand the many pieces to a puzzle which sometimes those gifted with the living Force couldn’t always see. This was the main reason he had butted heads with his old Master, especially about the Council, he was able to see all sides to a conflict and how they might affect the future.

That still didn’t explain why they couldn’t have told him about her mission, especially when there was a chance he’d run into her on his own mission...no, he realized had he known he could’ve inadvertently blown her cover. It was his natural reactions that helped sell her deception, and as painful as it had been he knew ultimately he had to be kept in the dark for the success of her mission (and for her own safety). 

He also realized he couldn’t hold it against Siri for not telling him on the day she ripped their pair bond, every layer of authenticity to her story kept her secret safe, and there was no way she would have kept the bond between them otherwise he would’ve been able to easily find her. He suddenly felt immense sympathy for Siri, all those years on her own, having to repair the torn bond in her own head alone. Obi-Wan realized who to direct his anger towards, and it was himself for ever doubting her commitment. 

He also realized that meant he also owed Quinlan Vos an apology. Their friendship had become incredibly strained in the last several years, and while Obi-Wan wanted to cling to the idea that they had grown apart because they were two radically different Jedi (and Vos’ personality seemed to only grow louder as he got older), but he knew that the distance between them started because of his anger towards the Kiffar for convincing him not to continue his search for Siri. Quinlan had only been trying to protect their friend and he had reacted poorly in response.

There was so much he needed to say to so many different people. He closed his eyes to try and come up with a plan of action, he was always better when he had a strategy in place. He’d speak to Anakin first, it was his duty as a Master to check on his pupil, especially after a difficult mission. And boy, had this been a difficult mission for Anakin. He would make sure the twelve, almost thirteen year old was okay before he even ventured to speak to Siri (outside of the small talk they had already shared). But, of course it appeared as if the Force had other plans in mind. 

The knock on the door shook him from his thoughts, but the voice caused so many emotions at once he struggled to answer. 

“Obi-Wan, are you decent? ‘Cause I’m coming in either way.” The familiar teasing voice made him feel like he was back on missions with Qui-Gon, Siri and Adi from years past. 

“I just...I need a moment…” He found he struggled to say her name. “Please.” 

Silence hung between them. “I know first hand how much damage a punch from a Wookiee can do, I just wanted to check on your arm.” 

“I’m fine, no need to concern yourself.” He grimaced at his tone, he knew he was being childish. 

“If you say so,” her voice sounded small, so unlike Siri. “I’ll leave you to it.”

Obi-Wan closed his eyes, it was times like these where he longed for Qui-Gon’s advice.

*****

Siri slowly turned away from the door, feeling a bone deep exhaustion through her entire body. She also felt an odd sense of unease at the quiet and lavish ship; she had grown accustomed to the constant and loud sounds of both pirates and slaves over the course of four years. She sighed to herself, wondering how difficult being in the peaceful Jedi Temple was going to be. She had no idea how she was even going to sleep. 

She glanced back at Obi-Wan’s quarters and then down the hallway where she could hear Anakin and Chancellor Palpatine playing a game of Dejarik. Siri knew they had over eight hours yet to Coruscant and she had no one to talk to. It wasn’t as if she wasn’t used to being alone, in fact she had grown comfortable in her solidarity. She had decided early on in her mission that there was no way she was going to make friends with any of the pirates (though despite herself she came close with Hondo Ohnaka) and for her safety and mental wellness she wouldn’t dare get close to any of the slaves. She hadn’t had a friendly conversation in so long that she wondered if she even remembered how. So when Obi-Wan wasn’t in a mood to have a heart to heart talk she was secretly glad. 

She honestly didn’t know what she was going to say to him beyond the long overdue apology. 

Siri found herself making her way to the kitchen, pouring herself a cup of caf, briefly thanking the crew member who had decided to make another pot despite the late hour. As she took a sip her thoughts drifted to the last time she had seen Obi-Wan on a rain soaked rooftop. It felt like a lifetime ago, yet it was etched so vividly in her memory.

_ /“Siri, please don’t leave me.” His voice was a whimper. “I can’t lose you too.” _

_ “I never wanted it to be this way...” She brushed her thumb over his cheek, it was her turn to wipe the tears.  _

_ “Then why are you making it this way?” His voice was almost a whisper. / _

She closed her eyes at the memory, it was one that had haunted her nearly every night of her mission (when she wasn’t plagued by images of the horrendous acts carried out by her very own hand). She realized the pained expression in his eyes that night was the same when he saw her again as Zora. 

_ /Zora strode into the communications center, taking a bite of Jogan fruit as she smirked at her fellow First Mate. She and Rashtah had been vying for Krayn’s favor for over a year and it looked like things might just be going her way.  _

_ “Wow, an intruder? Were you asleep on your watch Rashtah?” Zora jabbed, enjoying the angry glare from the Wookiee. “Now I forget, does Krayn like to reward incompetence?”  _

_ Rashtah let out a series of curse words in Shyriiwook and pulled up the security screens. Zora watched over his shoulder, her keen senses attuned to the shadows in the security footage. She had sensed a familiar presence in the Force, but she was certain she had to have been hallucinating.  _

_ Then, she saw him. His hair had grown out and he hid his youthful face behind a beard, but it was unmistakable who had boarded Krayn’s ship. _

_ ‘What. The. Everloving Kriff?’ She thought to herself while keeping her facade up.  _

_ “Alert Krayn, I’ll head them off.” Zora exclaimed to her Wookiee partner and left without an answer.  _

_ She knew if Krayn or Rashtah found them first then one of two things would happen, either her cover would be blown and the four years of pain she had inflicted on people would be for nothing, or he’d kill Obi-Wan.  _

_ Or there was a third option - he could force her to kill Obi-Wan to prove her loyalty.  _

_ There was no way she’d allow any of those scenarios to happen. She called upon the Force to aid her tracking while still masking her presence from Kenobi and Skywalker. _

_ ‘Was that really Anakin? Wow, he’s grown so much’ A fleeting thought crossed her mind as she jumped onto the catwalks above the hanger./ _

Siri took another drink of caf as her thoughts drifted. She had often dreamed about coming back to the Temple and reuniting with her friends. She knew that her public fight with Adi coupled with her actions on the roof would mean she had some damage control to do with regards to her reputation, but the way he spoke to her...she wondered if she’d ever be able to mend what had been broken. 

_ /“You will not shoot him Siri,” his voice was surprisingly steady. _

_ “I am Siri no longer,” she did her best to stay in character though she could feel her hands beginning to tremble. “I am Zora.” _

_ She could hear Krayn coming, there was precious little time. She knew she could hide Anakin as one of the slaves (though she desperately didn’t want to put the boy through that), but Obi-Wan was distinctly Jedi...she couldn’t hide him, couldn’t protect him from Krayn’s wrath. Not to mention the mission had to come first.  _

_ Always, the mission had to come first. She had to figure out how to get him out of the ship...now. _

_ “There is still Jedi in you,” his familiar eyes bore into her, the pain in them so much like that night on the roof. “Even though you have betrayed EVERY part of our code.” His tone was meant to hurt her, and it cut down to the bone. _

_ Siri could hear Krayn coming closer, she had to find a way to get him to safety. She couldn’t let her personal feelings get in the way. She’d have to hurt him in order to save him. _

_ “There are so many things I do not miss about the Jedi…” she worked hard not to drop her character. “One is their self-righteousness.” She sneered, giving a poignant look in Obi-Wan’s direction. “It’s so...boring.”  _

_ Krayn was on top of them now, she had only one chance, if she used the turbines to flush his ship into space it’d look like she meant to kill him...there was a possibility it could kill him, she just had to trust that his training would save him.  _

_ ‘Forgive me my dear friend.’  _

_ Her thoughts betrayed the look of hatred on her face as she forced Obi-Wan back into his ship and turned on the turbines, dumping him into space. She then turned and focused both blasters on Anakin who seemed to just now recognize her.  _

_ She looked up and saw Krayn, she quickly snatched Anakin’s lightsaber from his belt and hid it beneath her tunic.  _

_ “What’s this?” Krayn bellowed, motioning to Anakin. “Have you caught the intruder?” _

_ “It’s nobody...just a slave” Siri continued to adopt the uncaring and menacing voice of Zora. _

_ ‘Force, I’m so sorry....’ she thought to herself as she saw the anger rising in Anakin’s eyes. /  _

Siri was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t sense the other presence entering the room, she also hadn’t noticed that she had been sitting there for almost two hours and most of the rest of the ship had gone to bed. 

“This seat taken?” A familiar accented voice startled her. 

She looked up at Obi-Wan who had two mugs in his hands, he offered one to her as he sat down. She took it, discarding her cup of caf that had gone cold. She drank the hot lemon ginger tea and sighed in pleasure.

“It’s been so long since I’ve had a good cup of tea.” She commented, deciding to keep the conversation light in order to not scare him off. She then lifted the mug and pointed to it. “I can’t believe you remembered how I take it.” 

“Don’t be silly, of course I remembered.” He offered her a half smile and sipped from his own mug. 

They sat in silence for a moment. 

“You changed your hair back…” Obi-Wan motioned to Siri’s once again blonde hair. 

She nodded. “Yeah, I just needed to wash this mission off...quite literally.” She ran a hand through the short undercut. Though, I guess it’ll take time for it to grow out.

“I like it, the short hair suits you.” Obi-Wan looked at her over the lip of his mug. “I must admit, I do like the blonde better than the fake looking red though.” 

Siri leaned back in her seat and crossed her legs. “Yes it’s well documented that you prefer blondes.” 

He shook his head and playfully smacked her arm. She giggled in response, both enjoying how easy it was to fall back into their old rhythm. As his hand lingered on her arm though everything came rushing back to them and both returned their attention to their drinks. 

“I’m so sorry…” Obi-Wan finally said. 

She looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “What in all the Corellian hells are YOU apologizing for?” 

“I gave up on you, on trying to find you.” His voice was terribly sad. “I should’ve known you’d never leave the Order.” 

“Oh, Obi-Wan…” 

She placed her mug down on the table and reached out to grab his hand. He hesitated at first and then wrapped his fingers tightly around hers. 

“I’m the one who should be sorry Obi-Wan,” her voice was remorseful. “I just left you there on that roof…” her eyes began to fill with tears. “When you needed me the most and...and I wasn’t there.” 

“Hey…” he placed his other hand on top of hers. “The mission always has to come first, we both know that.” He squeezed her hand. “I’m not going to lie to you though, I almost died after you severed the bond, but…”

“What?!” 

He smiled. “I’m kidding...I mean, well it wasn’t good, but I pulled through.” 

It was her turn to smack his arm. “I see your sense of humor has grown even more inappropriate over the years if that’s even possible.” 

“Well I have to laugh these days to keep from crying.” He halfheartedly joked.

She nodded. “Masterhood troubles?” 

“Let’s just say I have a new appreciation for Qui-Gon being able to raise three teenage boys. It’s no wonder he didn’t want another Padawan after two.” He chuckled and took another sip of his tea. “And it’s only going to get worse I fear.” 

Siri returned the chuckle. “Come on, that kid loves you, you do know that right?” 

“Bah,” 

“No I’m serious, you have no idea how much he defended you to me when he thought I hated you.” She smirked. “Of course little does he know I in fact really do hate you.” 

“The feeling is more than mutual, my darling.” He raised his mug as if to toast her. 

They sat in silence for another moment, this time feeling more comfortable.

“Qui-Gon would be so very proud of you.” Her tone was serious and Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. “You really do still doubt that?” 

Obi-Wan shrugged. “The last time he saw me I had failed him, I failed to save his life and then I killed out of anger. And yesterday my own Padawan, the one he trusted me with also killed out of anger. I’m not sure there is much for him to be proud of.” 

“Anakin killed Krayn out of self defense,” 

“Like I did with the Sith?” He tilted his head to the side. “Just because its defense doesn’t mean there aren’t other motives beneath the surface.” 

“Both of you did what had to be done in the moment.” She reached out and gently rubbed his shoulder. “And wasn't Qui-Gon all about living in the moment?”

“I highly doubt that’s what he meant.” Obi-Wan let out a small snort. “Besides, Anakin’s actions in killing Krayn meant that your mission, everything you endured was for nothing.”

“My mission was to infiltrate Krayn’s organization and discover his connections to various levels of government officials...which I uncovered plenty of connections by the way. Whether Krayn lived to be brought to justice by the courts or not doesn’t have any effect on my mission.” She sighed. “And even if Anakin’s actions had nullified my mission’s information I still can’t call it a failure because so many people have now been set free as a result.” 

“I just can’t imagine what you went through.” His voice grew soft and concerned. "Are you sure you're okay?" 

“It’s not so much what I went through that lingers, it’s more what I did…” She admitted, looking down at her hands. 

“And what was it you did?”

Siri looked up at him and shook her head. “I’m not ready to talk about it, frankly I may never be.”

“I am here should you ever change your mind.” His eyes were kind and made her heart hurt. 

“You may not like me very much once you hear it.” She looked away from him. 

He moved and knelt down in front of her and placed his hands on either side of her face, forcing her to look at him. “That’s not possible Siri,” 

Her eyes began to fill with tears as she looked into his. “That’s a name I’ve not heard in a long time…Say it again.” 

“Siri...my dear Siri.” He leaned up and kissed her forehead. 

Unable to stop the tears Siri slid off her chair and knelt on the floor with him, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. Obi-Wan placed a hand behind her head and the other around her waist and pulled her close, feeling her tears on his neck. 

“This is so stupid…” She said between sobs. “Ugh, I hate this.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone that you have human emotions.” He smiled and she let out a muffled laugh between tears. 

Eventually the two friends found themselves sitting on the floor in the ship's small kitchen, catching one another up on the previous four years. It wasn’t until the Captain announced their final approach to Coruscant that they decided to come back to the moment instead of reliving memories of the past. 

“We’re playing Sabacc tonight.” Obi-Wan said as Siri was about to head to her quarters to grab her travel pack. “You should join us, I know Garen would love a rematch.” 

Siri looked down to the ground. “Oh...I’m not sure everyone would want to see me, I know how protective they can be and according to you I practically left you for dead. Even though the excuse was that it was for a mission, I’m still not sure I’ll be accepted back with open arms.”

“I think you underestimate them.” 

“I think you underestimate how much you mean to them.” She turned to leave. 

“My quarters at 1900 should you change your mind.” He watched her leave and then turned to go collect his Padawan. “And I hope you do.” 

*****

Finally back home Obi-Wan sat down on his bed, drying his freshly washed hair with a towel. He could hear his Padawan tinkering with an unfinished droid in their common room, a table had long been set up in the opposite corner of what was once Qui-Gon’s reading nook. It made the small space cramped, but it gave the overactive mind of his Apprentice something to do so Obi-Wan adjusted to the disorder. Apparently Anakin proved more difficult than Qui-Gon in managing to keep his mess only to his personal space. And the new Master learned he needed to pick his battles with his young charge so he made sure to always wear shoes in the common room to avoid stepping on forgotten nuts and bolts. 

Obi-Wan found each year that passed it became easier to think about his former Master without feeling the companion of grief and longing. He was able to relive memories and tell funny stories without getting choked up. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever not feel pain when thinking back on that day on Naboo, but time made the pain feel more dull and manageable. It helped that he had Qui-Gon’s journal full of words of wisdom and training tips by his side, it felt like he could still turn to his old Master for guidance. He honestly didn’t know how he would’ve managed to get through Anakin’s first year of training without it. Obi-Wan had even begun making his own notes at the back of the leather bound book, planning on bestowing it to Anakin one day. He smiled to himself, allowing the brief amusing thought of Anakin having to deal with his own challenging Padawan...he couldn’t wait to be a fly on that wall. 

He brought his thoughts back to the present as he placed the towel down and proceeded to get dressed. His room looked more like his own now, he had eventually been able to donate most of Qui-Gon’s old clutter and trinkets to various departments within the Temple, only keeping the ones that truly held sentimental value. Now the simple bookcase in the corner was filled with its intended purpose - books along with various simple frames containing holopics of important people in his life. Obi-Wan knew possessions while not forbidden to a Jedi were not encouraged so instead of collecting trinkets he tended to collect memories. One shelf was nothing but a collection of journals; he had kept a journal for every year that he was an apprentice to Qui-Gon Jinn, and now was keeping one for every year that he was a Master to Anakin, they were filled with stories of their missions as well as beautiful drawings he did by memory of places they had visited and people they had met. 

As he sat back down on the bed to pull on his boots his eyes traveled down to the bedside table. There was the same picture that had been by Qui-Gon’s bedside of him and his late Master at the Coruscanti zoo, next to it was a picture of him and Anakin upon their first visit to the same zoo one month after Qui-Gon’s passing. Obi-Wan studied the two photos and smiled, memories of both trips overlapping in his mind. He then noticed a familiar (and still horribly disgusting yet well loved) Tooka doll sitting between the two picture frames. Anakin had lent him his prized possession after his bond had been severed, and always insisted it remained with Obi-Wan, though the boy always clung to it on the nights where he had crawled into bed with Obi-Wan after a particularly bad dream. Now that Anakin was approaching his formidable years he didn’t seem to care that the doll permanently stayed with his Master. 

“How was your day, Spikes?” Obi-Wan asked the doll as he pulled on his last boot, he waited as if allowing the doll to reply. “Yes, yes I’m glad to be home as well.” 

As he rose to his feet Obi-Wan’s eyes landed on the remaining object on the bedside table, it was a familiar lightsaber hilt. He lifted the silver cylinder in his hand, taking note again just how big it was for his palm, knowing he had made the right decision constructing a new one for himself. But, he liked having it near him instead of forgotten down in the archives. The familiar energy from the kyber crystal inside had a particular calming effect on him. He knew keeping it was a sign of attachment, but he’d made his peace with that, he had a strange feeling within the Force that he was meant to guard this saber and it’s crystal for something yet to come. 

_ “Keep your concentration here and now where it belongs.” _ the voice he’d never forget rang through his head and he smiled as he placed the saber back on the nightstand. 

“Yes Master,” he whispered. 

A door chime brought him back to the moment and he moved to answer it. He motioned for Anakin not to bother extracting himself from the pile of droid parts as he made his way towards the door. The smile upon his face was genuine and the happiest it’s been in years as he saw three of his best friends on the other side. All of his friends were no longer Padawans as Garen and Reeft had both been knighted within the last four years, which meant that all of them seemed to be sent on constant missions. This was the first time all of them had been back at the Temple together in over two years and they were not going to squander it. 

Exchanges of greetings were extended. A huge hug from Bant, a shoulder hug from Reeft and the completion of a complicated handshake with Garen that they had developed as initiates. Obi-Wan couldn’t wait to hear tales of their adventures, knowing the game of Sabacc was more of a formality for their gathering together. He watched as each of them greeted Anakin, glad to see his apprentice was equally happy to see his friends, especially given the difficult mission they had just completed. 

As Obi-Wan turned to close the door he sensed a familiar presence at the end of the hall. He looked up and saw Siri hesitate to approach. He offered her a knowing smile and gestured with his head for her to approach. It hadn’t taken long for it to spread through the Temple that Siri had been working undercover and that her fight with Adi and exodus had been staged. But, Obi-Wan knew it would take a while for everyone to be comfortable around her again. 

Siri cautiously made her way inside his apartment, holding something behind her back. As soon as the others noticed her it was as if the air had been sucked out of the room. Obi-Wan moved to the middle of the group, ready to play mediator if the need arose.

“I don’t even know where to begin to apologize…” Siri finally broke the silence. “But I brought Kowakian Rum as a peace offering.” 

Siri held out the bottle and Obi-Wan couldn’t help the laugh that escaped due to the tension in the room. Reeft warily nodded in response, moving to plop down on the couch, Bant’s expression was extremely guarded but as always kind, and Garen moved from Anakin’s side towards Siri. 

“Your first solo mission was spent four years undercover as a pirate…” He took the bottle out of her hand. “Kriffing overachiever.” 

Siri looked up at him with tears in her eyes as Garen enveloped her in a hug. Reeft quickly jumped off the couch and followed suit, wrapping both Garen and Siri in a tight embrace. Anakin was next to follow, along with Obi-Wan. Bant shook her head and couldn’t help herself, she ran into the group hug eagerly. 

In the back of his mind Obi-Wan knew this probably wasn’t the most Jedi of behaviors, but in that moment he didn’t care. His family was together and he had learned how quickly that can change so he decided to finally take his Master’s advice and live in the moment.

*The End* 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: This chapter was incredibly difficult to write, partially because there were more loose ends to tie up then I realized, but also because that meant I am done with this story and I had such a blast writing it. I want to thank each and every one of you who took the time to read it - I can’t believe I’m almost at 3,000 hits! And if you took the time to leave a kudos or better yet a review I can’t thank you enough!! 
> 
> I have several other stories in the works, but since writing this particular group of friends was so much fun I am going to try and come up with something involving all of them again soon! - Please let me know if there is anything in particular you’d like to see.
> 
> I wanted this chapter set from mostly Obi-Wan's perspective since the rest of the story was mostly from his friend's side of the story...I hope it worked out! I also felt like the story needed to end on some fluff given all the angst I've put our dear Kenobi (and Siri) through. 
> 
> For those interested you can read the Jedi Quest book where Siri’s undercover mission is discovered by Obi-Wan here:   
> https://www.wattpad.com/297725-jedi-quest-path-to-truth/page/17  
> Any of the dialogue I used in the flashbacks was pulled from that book (I just added the flavor text). 
> 
> The scene where Anakin creates a training droid to look like Maul plus the mission that follows it (where Anakin is considering leaving the Jedi) is in reference to the Obi-Wan and Anakin comic book mini series - it's technically the first cannon story of their early days together so I wanted to fit it into this timeline. 
> 
> I read a theory that Luke's second saber crystal was actually Qui-Gon's old crystal found in Ben's hovel when he goes to Tattooine to rescue Han in Return of the Jedi - I really liked that idea so I decided to hint at it here. 
> 
> Thank you again for reading, please drop me a note and tell me what you thought about the whole thing!!

**Author's Note:**

> I always felt like Obi-Wan being basically thrown under the bus to make room for Anakin was just glossed over (besides some other great fanfics) - especially since he'd been trying to prove his worth basically since the start of his apprenticeship, I just can't imagine the hurt he would've felt in that moment. 
> 
> So I wanted to give him a chance to vent about it to his friends before coming to terms with it.


End file.
